single father A single father is a phenomenon in the pastunusual. And these days it's not so rare. Recently, somehow confused the concept of purely male and exclusively female responsibilities. Now many ladies are fond of a professional career or personal life. And they do not consider that the upbringing of children is the main goal of their life. They can confidently delegate to their father and go home, not particularly bothering with the problems of their former family. I must say that men with children are more likely to arrange their personal lives better than women in the same situation. What to do, so the world works. Representatives of the stronger sex in it in demand more than we. Some of the women even knowingly seek to get acquainted with the single fathers, believing that they are more reliable than other men. In this there is reason. Not everyone can independently bear responsibility for their children. However, the relationship with such a father has its own nuances, which it is better to know in advance.

Difference of single fathers from other men

What are the single fathers? They are the same as the single mothers. Some of them were widowed, someone took the children from their wife who was not attentive to them, and someone decided to raise them independently so as not to pay alimony. In any case, not every man is ready to take daily care of the child and a constant sense of full responsibility for him. It turns out that the father of a loner is something special, more reserved, understanding, tolerant and purposeful. It seems to be worth the relationship with such a man mass. He will not begin to hang out where, after work, he will try to provide the family as best as possible, and certainly will not dare to commit treason. At the same time, there is in alliance with such a man and quite a serious minus - a child for him, most likely, will be more important than his wife. Therefore, she will have to adjust, changing her habits and aspirations. In general, the view that any single father dreams of finding a mother in the first place for his child is not entirely true. Someone does not look for her at all, considering that he will manage himself. And someone dreams about the beloved, who will share with him both trouble and joy. Women who intend to connect their lives with a man raising children, often make the same mistake. Trying to win the man's heart, they struggle to pretend to be a caring mother. The attempt to immediately find an approach to the child is commendable, but not expedient. Not only does this not always work and often looks insincere. Such actions can irritate a man and his discrepancy with his rules of upbringing, and a lack of attention to him. It is possible that a man is primarily looking for a loving girlfriend. Well, then a good mother for her children. So how to be a woman counting on an alliance with a single father? fathers of a loner

How to find an approach to a man with a child

If our chosen one is a single father, relations with him should be built according to certain rules.

  • Rule one. Before you win the child's affection, you need to establish a warm and trusting contact with his father. This will help to find out what role he defines a woman in his life;
  • Rule two. In communicating with the child, do not force events and not impose their care on him. It is necessary to behave as naturally as possible and not to do something that does not correspond to personal nature. This can alienate both the child and his father;
  • The third rule. Correct your behavior in accordance with the manner of education, developed by a man. It is not necessary to stand in a pose, imposing to it the principles of education. The father is with the child almost from his birth. His punishment and encouragement are familiar and perceived as a norm. And the actions of an extraneous woman, even if they are well-intentioned, can be taken with hostility;
  • Rule four. Do not compete with the child, seeking to win his attention and the love of his father. Unfortunately, this happens quite often. A woman is secretly jealous of her man to his child and tries with all his might to take hold of the heart of the chosen one. Such actions create a tense atmosphere in the relationship and the consequences of their prediction are difficult;
  • The fifth rule. Do not interfere aggressively in the relationship of the pope with his child. This can be perceived as a threat from a woman;
  • Rule six. Patiently and calmly, if a man wants to spend time alone with his child;
  • The seventh rule. Do not require the child to love and confess. Let this happen by itself. And if it does not happen, do not be offended and do not stay away from the man;
  • Rule eighth. Do not explicitly show your love for a man in the presence of a child. This can cause jealousy in him.

Of course, there are children who are ready to recognize their motherany woman who appeared in their house. If only it was not too harsh and cruel. Usually this applies to those who do not remember their own mother and very much suffer from her absence. The pity and indulgence of adults and some arrogance of mothers who have a mother make a child doubt their own usefulness. So he dreams that one day a woman will come to the family. It does not matter what it will be. The main thing is that this will eliminate doubts and feel equal to other children. However, children of this kind are few. Most of the children, who are raised by one father, are opposed to joining his life with a member of the weaker sex. The reason for this attitude can be childish egoism, the fear of losing the pope's love, the reluctance to share it with someone else, the fear of destroying his little world. A great role is played by the fact that children growing up in fairy tales and stories about evil stepmothers are simply afraid of the presence of such a "wicked witch" nearby. In a word, the relationship with a single father often reminds a bit of a walk through the minefield. Each step and every act of a woman, at least at first, will have to be analyzed. From this can not escape, because it will be closely watched inquisitive children's eyes. And if, in the opinion of the child, something is wrong, a lasting alliance with his father may be a big question. Of course, this does not mean that it is almost impossible to create a good family in this case. A single father is also a man, just communicating with him has his own specifics. For example, a child can remember his mother well and even meet with her. He will certainly compare with the mother present in the house aunt. It is not easy to sustain this. But, with the right approach to the situation, it is possible. Children grow up, and their views on life change. Over time, they will learn to calmly perceive their dual position, and everything will fall into place. In general, the union with the single father is good for women who are not going to give birth. But those who already have their children or intend to acquire them, may well decide on this type of relationship. Perhaps, he will be the best option for finding happiness.

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