No matter how you learned about the treasonbeloved spouse - guessed it yourself, someone "enlightened" you, or the husband himself confessed ... In any case, this news must have hit you like a ton of bricks, crushing your weight and knocking the ground out from under your feet. Of course, any woman in this situation hopes that you can do something that would help save the family, no matter how much the pain and insult in the depth of one's heart was not burned. You want this and you; you can not, with the weight of the grief that has fallen upon you, gather your thoughts and decide what to do now and how to survive the betrayal of a loved one, how to go beyond pain, forgive an unfaithful spouse and save a marriage.
What to do when you learn about treason
We understand that you need us not so muchwords of consolation, how much clear leadership, what and how to do. It is to help you gather your thoughts faster and understand what to do right away, and what - a little later, we offer you not an article-reasoning about the change and its causes, but an article-instruction with an outline of the optimal actions in your situation . Let it serve you as a beacon, to the light of which you will go, getting out of the abyss of grief.
- Think twice before announcing to your familyor the husband's family about his infidelity. It may happen that you have already established your relationship with your spouse, and someone from family members will never be able to forgive him or you: him - for betrayal and debauchery, and you - because you accused him of something or for having forgiven him.
- Knowing what type of betrayal has occurred, sometimesmakes it easier to understand. Was it accidental and only for one night, or was it a novel? Has this happened in connection with the crisis of middle age, or is this generally characteristic of your man's behavior? In different situations, the reaction to treason will be different.
- On the other hand, in most cases,there is a simple answer to why someone becomes unfaithful. This may be a symptom of some problems in the marriage, but it can also refer to something in the past of your spouse.
- You have to go through the process of mourning. You will experience denial, anger, depression, and only then will the acceptance of what happened. You must understand that this is how our psyche is arranged; but this does not mean that you can never forgive your husband if you are now, for example, at the stage of anger. Because in due time there will come a stage of acceptance, and you can forgive it and save the marriage. So do not rush to make hasty conclusions and do not make decisions in the heat.
What you need now
- Complete sleep
- Healthy Eating
- Free expression of emotions
- Readiness to Forgive
Four steps to preserving marriage after treason
Your marriage should not be destroyed just because your husband was caught cheating. But you both have to work hard so that the family does not fall apart. We are ready here to give you a guide to action.
How to restore trust
Of course, trust after treason is seriously undermined, so it's worth talking about its restoration in more detail. A few more instructions to help you:
- Recognize that the restoration of trust takes time. It will not happen in one day or even a month.
- You can not completely forget about betrayal, but you can completely part with the pain after betrayal. Only this also takes time.
- Share your feelings with each other. Such openness will help you to get close again, and intimacy will revive trust.
What you need now
- The desire to save a marriage
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