At the beginning of their relationship, two people in love andthoughts do not allow that someday this euphoria of feelings can end. So what if for others love passes later? For others… But for them it will be different! For them – love until the end of life. Oh, it would be good if in most cases it really remained forever. But it does not! Time passes and one of the lovers (or even both) increasingly often flashes in the head: “We need to break up – it will be right.” It should be noted that the fact of breaking up does not necessarily have to be put into practice. People are so arranged that sometimes they need to be apart and take a break from each other. However, sometimes a couple really should end the relationship. Otherwise, the once brightly burning love risks turning, at best, into indifference and alienation, at worst – into hatred. How can you understand that a breakup will be the best way out of the situation? And how to break up with a guy so as not to feel an unpleasant aftertaste?
Signs that the relationship has reached a dead end
Yes, unfortunately, it also happens that one day wewe understand – the relationship has reached a dead end. And the question of what to do next becomes more painful with each passing day. There are no particular reasons for breaking up. But the former tenderness, the desire to be together every minute, the desire to know about each other, all have disappeared somewhere. This can be explained by a banal truth – romance always ends sooner or later. And monotonous everyday life comes to replace it. So what should we say now every time “let’s break up” as soon as these very everyday life comes? You can easily end up with nothing! Of course, breaking up as soon as you realize that the romance in the relationship has disappeared is not worth it under any circumstances. Our feelings have the ability to change their intensity and move to a new, calmer quality. This is normal for their further strengthening and development. You can’t burn with love forever, there is a huge risk of one day burning to the ground. Therefore, if suddenly the relationship has become less hot, hastily concluding that it has exhausted itself is unreasonable. This is not a significant reason for separation. What signs will tell that the relationship between a man and a woman has exhausted itself?
- Partners are bored together. I do not want to discuss any films, books, events. Do not attract visits to two of some events. Time is more interesting to spend in a circle of friends, but, without seclusion from society;
- The main reason for discussion are abstract, superficial conversations, and not a lively discussion about joint plans for the future. Conversations relate, in the main, to the everyday aspects of life;
- Man and woman exist, as if in differentworlds. Each has its own interests, which come into contact only occasionally and briefly. Partners prefer to have a rest apart and feel much better than having a couple. And neither of them express any displeasure at the same time;
- The two do not miss each other at all. It does not matter to them how the affairs of the one who was very dear before were going. Whatever happens to him, does not cause any special emotions. And if one partner tries to tell something about himself, the other is irritated and tries to interrupt the conversation as soon as possible;
- A man and a woman do not give any pleasure to please each other with gifts. They either do not give anything at all, or give only because it's customary, while getting rid of something standard;
- Partners feel more comfortable when notare close by and can do their own things. They do not have the desire to help each other, solve common problems and even know where, who and how to spend time;
- The guy and the girl do not feel an acute needin communication and call up now only to discuss some business and everyday moments. News they prefer to tell friends and girlfriends, and if you need some advice, they also turn to them;
- The couple does not stretch to regular physicalcontact. A man and a woman do not kiss when they meet and part and almost never hug. Sex in relationships can still be present, but it becomes quite rare and monotonous;
- Partners are increasingly pronouncing "I", not "we". The most basic of their life plans are different, each rushes forward in its own way.
Well, these are probably all the main signs thatneed to break up. However, they are by no means an indisputable indicator of a complete breakdown of the relationship. There are many couples who have passed such a period of alienation and successfully continued their life together. Nevertheless, it is these signs that very often lead to people breaking up completely and then regretting it. So how can you avoid mistakes? How can you make the word "break up" go away?
Is it possible to maintain a relationship?
It must be said that when between a man and a womanthere is no warmth, they do not burn with the desire to always be together - this is not a reason to run away in different directions. There are many unions based on calculation. They exist quite successfully for years, and no one in such unions is particularly nervous about the lack of passion and mutual attraction. In addition, a wall of alienation can also arise between loving people. The reason for this is unspoken grievances, betrayal, inability to discuss problems, spiritual immaturity. Therefore, before making a final decision, it is advisable to frankly discuss the state of affairs, asking the question point-blank: "Should we break up or not?" Even if the answer is not pleasing, it will finally determine what is really going on. Yes, it happens that one person still hopes to restore the relationship, while the other categorically does not want it. The best way out in this case is to break up. Further existence side by side will most likely only aggravate the situation. Of course, parting is not always easy. Often, when the final point is made, it suddenly turns out that there is something that connects a man and a woman. It was just not taken into account before. And this “something” can be very significant. Sometimes we do not realize how strong the moral and social connection is between us. And we understand this only after we have separated. Well, we will have to go through a difficult period. Or not allow it. Everyone decides for themselves. In general, if in a union both can still laugh together at the same things, all is not lost. Focus on your feelings, set your priorities correctly. You and only you must understand whether you need this person. If yes - start with yourself. Change your attitude to the state of affairs. You will always have time to break off the relationship, it is better to try to improve it.
How to part properly
If you still understand that furtherthe relationship with the guy will not lead to anything, you need to think about how to break up with him correctly. Especially if you understand that his feelings for you have not faded, and yours have already been given to another person. It is in this case that parting is inevitable. You cannot do without it even when you understand that the person next to you is not the one you need. He does not take your opinion into account, finds a reason for jealousy where there is none. Or maybe he is even cheating, but he himself is in no hurry to leave for his own reasons, understood only by him. So how to properly break up with a person who was recently dear to you, how to competently explain to him that your life together is over? Let's consider this issue in more detail.
- If your partner is impulsive and vulnerableaffects, the best option is a written explanation. Outline the essence of the problem in the letter, explain why you took this decision. Yes, and do not forget to thank the man for the best moments of your life together (for certain you have something to remember), ask not to make scandals and just let you go;
- With a calm guy you can discuss the situationtete-a-tete. Of course, it will be very difficult to start a conversation. However, it is better to tell everything as it is, to be honest and not to start a conversation from afar. It is best to correctly and concisely express your claims, not giving reason to justify. After all, you have definitely decided to leave, and another long conversation will lead to nothing;
- Leaving go. Remember this saying? If you constantly return, for example, for forgotten things, it will become another nervous shock for both you and the partner;
- Leave immediately and forever. Only this way will be correct. But never leave without explanation. A man should know what he earned your disgrace and deserved it at all.
Of course, all the above tips will not helpguarantees that the breakup will pass without scandals. The man may start to take revenge on you or press on your pity. Constantly call, ask to come and help with everyday problems. Never give in to provocations, if necessary - change your phone number. Not intending to return, do not give hope. Time will pass and he will calm down, and your life will enter a new direction. We advise you to read:
