How to generate interest from the interlocutor
Each person is individual.We are all endowed with some qualities that are unique to us. Everyone has their own goals, views on life, principles and priorities. It is absolutely normal for everyone to want to feel some significance in society. This desire is the main key to success and good luck in communication. In order for communication to be called successful, it is enough to show concern for what your interlocutor says. The ability to support a conversation, to be interested in the thoughts and opinions of the interlocutor, the ability to listen attentively, to be sincere and friendly in conversation, perhaps this is what will help you learn to communicate with people. It is not for nothing that they say that the ability to listen and hear the interlocutor is valued much higher than the ability to speak. Not everyone has the ability to listen, and even fewer people have the ability to hear. This does not mean that when you meet, you need to pounce on your interlocutor like an old friend. Not everyone will like this, and it can even scare them away. Be very careful in your judgments, they should not be categorically indisputable. It is better to leave the last word to the interlocutor than to yourself. If you want to make a good impression on the interlocutor, give in to him in an argument: the relationship will not deteriorate, and you will remain with your opinion. In no case should you show arrogance in a conversation. When speaking, weigh every word. You must understand that an arrogant tone, a desire to exalt yourself above the opponent can greatly offend him, and then the opinion of you will not be the best, and it is unlikely that he will want to communicate with you again. Try to never stay on the sidelines, be closer to people. Each person will be much more pleased to communicate with someone who is on the same wavelength with him, so hiding in a corner will not be the best solution.
What you should pay attention to
Avoid talking if possible,containing complaints about your boss, colleagues, work in general or your fate. Remember that everyone has enough problems without you, so no one will want to listen to someone else's. People communicate for pleasure. An important psychological moment in a conversation is the pose in which you and your interlocutor are. It has been proven that by adopting the pose of your interlocutor, you thereby open him up to communication, create comfortable conditions for him. In a conversation, try to always be yourself. Unnaturalness in communication, the desire to show yourself as a completely different person from the outside can look very funny and ridiculous, although it may seem to you that you fit into this image perfectly. In any case, you won’t be able to play for long, and sooner or later people will find out what you really are. So why throw dust in the eyes, deceive your interlocutor already at the initial stages of communication. Naturalness and ease are the basic rules of behavior in communication. Often, some complexes of a person serve as an obstacle to normal communication. It is always worth remembering that all people are far from perfect. Everyone has their own pros and cons, advantages and disadvantages, however, this does not prevent them from communicating well and being the life of the party. If you yourself, when communicating, feel good and confident, others will definitely notice and appreciate it. It is very important to look into the eyes of your interlocutor during communication. A person who looks away during a conversation is unlikely to inspire trust in the opponent. Thus, you will either show how uninterested you are in what the interlocutor says, or what a dishonest person you are. It seems like nothing special, but still this is a very important moment in communication, capable of disposing to a conversation or, on the contrary, pushing away. If you do not know a person well, after learning his name, try to repeat it during the conversation, address him by name. This will be a very polite sign on your part. Probably, everyone found themselves in a situation when an unpleasant pause occurs between conversations. To avoid such an awkward moment in communication, it is worth forgetting about short answers like "yes" and "no". Answer your opponent's question as fully as possible and also ask questions that require a more detailed answer. This way, your conversation will flow naturally. But do not overdo it here either. Communication should not turn into an attack of questions. The interlocutor should feel comfortable, and not as if he is being interrogated and is simply forced to answer.
A few more tips
Of course, the more knowledge you have,the more you will be able to interest the person. Diverse interests cannot fail to attract your interlocutor. It is always interesting to communicate with someone who can tell some stories, tell about some interesting facts, etc. Learn to express your thoughts and ideas correctly, adapt them to someone else's perception. Remember that not everyone has exactly the same image in their head when they tell a story as you do. To do this, try to convey to your interlocutor the image that arose in you, provide information more clearly, explain everything that is necessary. Do not rush to answer questions right away. A sustained pause will help you not only collect your thoughts, think about the answer, but will also show interest and mystery on the part of the person with whom you are talking. Excessive gesticulation in communication can push the interlocutor to think about your lack of self-confidence. Extraneous hand movements can greatly distract from the essence of the conversation, while no one will appreciate the importance of your words, they will simply not be paid attention to them. Avoid using words and phrases with ambiguous subtext. Your words can be interpreted incorrectly, and can even offend the interlocutor. Say clearly what you mean. Not everyone can adapt to their interlocutor. This is a rather important point in communication. Observe your opponent, the pace of his speech, try to repeat it as much as possible. Communicating in the same manner will turn your conversation into a constructive conversation. Using filler words will not make your conversation more beautiful. If possible, limit your use of them. A person is unlikely to be pleased to listen to unnecessary and meaningless words. As a result, it will turn out that you say little on the matter, the conversation will become boring and uninteresting. By the way, even in a business conversation, it is sometimes appropriate to demonstrate your sense of humor. If you use it in a timely manner, you can defuse a tense situation and make communication relaxed. When communicating, take into account the age of your interlocutor. Let's say you are talking to a person who is much older than you. Here, accordingly, you should avoid slang expressions that may not be familiar to your interlocutor.
Let's sum up the results
Of course, the main teacher is experience,which does not come immediately. To get it, you need time and the right conditions. The main thing is to be as self-confident as possible, to be able to "carry" yourself, to put yourself in society. Expand your social circle, including completely different people: by age, and by views, and by life positions. Any communication starts small. Thanks to some communication skills, you will be able to become an authoritative person in your circles, to whom everyone will listen with interest. It is not for nothing that they say that self-love gives birth to the love of others for you. Only when you yourself begin to respect yourself, others will do the same towards you. The ability to communicate will definitely lead you to success. Communication skills are simply necessary in everyday life. Never be afraid to come out of the shadows, to start communication first. Be polite and friendly, and then you will be able to win the sympathy of the interlocutor. Good luck and success.
