For several decades, sexologists,psychologists, and ordinary people are racking their brains over the question: what is the most ideal age difference between a man and a woman? Someone argues that for complete happiness, husband and wife should be peers, someone argues for a difference of 4-5 years, and someone is sure that family well-being does not depend on how much older or younger one of them is spouses. Agree, despite the strong public opinion that it is not good for young girls to marry men of old age, and boys to marry "adult ladies", we can all bring a couple of examples of quite happy unions of people with a big age difference. And they do not interfere with the opinion of social scientists, nor the devastating articles in fashion magazines: they live happily themselves, on envy of other, more equal in age marriages. However, however you look, and yet such marriages are more likely, an exception, though a confirming rule. No matter how loyal we are to uneven marriages, for ourselves personally and for our loved ones we are still considering more traditional options. Who wants to have a native child connect his life with a man of 20 years older than himself? Yes, and we ourselves, choosing a life partner much older or younger than ourselves, at heart we are afraid that such an alliance will not bring anything good. Why? There are quite a few reasons, and besides the minuses, of course, there are pluses. Let's talk about how the difference in age can affect marriage.
Male 5-6 years older
It is believed that it is 5-6 years is the optimalage difference between spouses. In this situation, a man who has had time to gain some life experience, already more responsibly approaches the issue of relationships in marriage. In couples with such a difference, more children are born than in other unions, this is proved by many sociological studies. Indeed, only to the age of forty the representatives of the stronger sex begin to treat their fatherhood consciously, which allows the woman to give birth to not one but several children. Parental couples or unions with a large age difference often lack either financial means or the desire to have many children. Since childhood we have been training boys to think that it is necessary to create a family only when they are on their feet and will be able to provide their future wives and children financially. Realizing that a successful man should plant a tree, build a house and raise a son, the guys do not particularly strive to unite themselves in marriage for a certain moment. According to statistics, most men decide to start a family at about 30 years old, and they choose a wife several years younger than themselves. And these marriages are considered to be the strongest and most successful, because their existence is not hampered by the difference in interests between the spouses, nor by the absence of "initial capital", since men usually receive a certain material independence by that time.
A man 10-15 years older
The society is quite loyal to marriages, wherea man older than a woman is no more than 10 years. If the age difference is greater, the attitude towards such marriages is rather negative. Probably, this is just a stereotype of thinking, because during the Soviet Union it was exactly equal marriages, and any deviations from the norm were considered indecent. Now families, where the difference in age between a man and a woman is 10 years, are gaining popularity. A man by a certain age manages to build a career, to cease to depend on the opinion of relatives in relation to his own family. A more rich experience than a young wife, allows him to build relationships not so much on emotions as on the understanding of female psychology. A husband who is older than his wife for as long as 10 years is much less likely to make those stupid mistakes that are so characteristic of young boys at the beginning of a family relationship. They are more tolerant of the shortcomings of their second half, wiser in matters of everyday life and the resolution of conflict situations. In addition, their sexual experience allows you to keep your favorite woman around, giving her a completely "mature" pleasure in bed.
Male 20 years older
Another couple of hundred years was quite natural,When a young girl married a man who was her father. From such marriages expected stability and material prosperity. Now the situation has radically changed. Now the rule of agreeing on marriages between parents is left in the past, the girls choose their own partners. And if a young lady decides to combine her life with a man of age, then accusations are immediately poured on her - from her stupidity to the mercantile spirit. Few can believe in true, disinterested love between a young beauty and an aging man. Many scientists have concluded that such an unequal age marriage can reduce the life of spouses: constant gossip, gossip and the general negative attitude of others causes the husband and wife to have stresses that do not have the best effect on their health. On the other hand, a man over forty, married to a very young girl, suddenly begins to look, and even feel much younger than his years. He is allegedly fueled by her youth and energy, throwing off a dozen years. You can not say the same about his wife. As a rule, a woman who is married to a man who is much older than herself begins to fade before her eyes. On the one hand, she subconsciously strive to outwardly match the age of her spouse, on the other - energy "replenishment" of her husband does not pass without a trace, and the girl begins to rapidly grow old. Of course, a partner at a respectable age has both experience and an advantageous financial situation, but the moment is near when an attractive man with a light gray hair on his temples will become an old man with all the ensuing consequences. Unfortunately, many girls are not able to realistically assess their chances of spending all their lives with an elderly husband, taking care of his health and enduring his senile fancies. And they, undoubtedly, will appear - the age will make itself felt. You'll have to put up with the need to lead a lifestyle of your husband and forget about a full-fledged sexual life. Of course, you can always have a lover; but what kind of marriage is this? In addition, the chances of giving birth to a bunch of children from such women will tend to zero, since today most men of advanced age have real problems with the possibility of conception. Of course, there are happy exceptions, but they are quite rare. In real life, few of the older men are ready to continue their offspring, and more than once. Not only is this difficult purely physically, so even at a certain age they usually have children from other marriages. Why should they, in their old age, shoulder all these difficulties on their own shoulders-sleepless nights, diaper-napkins? Despite all these seemingly insurmountable obstacles, happy marriages where the husband is older than his wife for 20 years or more exist. True love works wonders, and many girls do not regret their choice. That's just for this decision on such a marriage should be weighed: a woman must understand what is gaining and what is lost thanks to such an alliance.
Woman older than 5 years
Although many contemptuously frown, after hearing aboutmarriage, where a woman is older than her husband, such families are by no means a rarity. At least because 5 years or slightly more - not such a big difference in age. Especially if such a marriage is made by people over 30 years of age. It's in adolescence 5 years in favor of the girl seem an insurmountable obstacle, at a more mature age this difference is almost imperceptible. Moreover, it has many advantages. A woman superior to her husband in her age, struggles to look young and attractive, so that the husband is not interested in any other young creature. Such a wife is both more experienced and wiser than her companion, which helps her to treat ordinary domestic troubles and minor quarrels more easily. In addition, it is known that it is after 30 a woman has a flourishing sexuality, which the young man is quite able to satisfy. However, there are also minuses of such a marriage. It would seem that an insignificant difference of 5 years may cause a woman to become jealous and suspicious, because the fear of growing old before a partner and seeming to him uninteresting and non-sexual - is quite large.
Woman older than 10 years
Such marriages are quite rare, because menalmost any age prefer girls younger than themselves. And the older they become, the more young girls are attracted to them. They were created by nature: men are males who try to prove to themselves and others all their life that they are the most courageous, the strongest and the sexiest. And what can emphasize the status of men better than the young beauty, adoringly looking into his eyes? That's why the cases when guys fall in love with women for 10 years older and marry them - not so often. Nevertheless, such marriages exist, and among them there are many happy ones. In order for a marriage, where the wife is older than her husband for 10 years, turned out to be happy, love alone is not enough. Unfortunately, love - the one that happens at the very beginning of a relationship - passes quickly. And then the couple have to face a huge number of difficulties. This is normal for any marriage lapping characters, and testing household difficulties, and the problem of noticeable aging of the wife. Unfortunately, by nature you will not leave, and at a certain age, wrinkles and other signs of withering become impossible. Any woman begins to feel anxiety, comparing herself with young women still as they were her husband. In addition, it is very difficult to survive the negative reaction of others to the fact that the wife is older than her husband for 10 years. On men are often looked with perplexity: they say, really could not find someone younger? Women in this situation are almost directly accused of shamelessness and stupidity: "She's completely mad! He will leave you in a couple of years! ". Not every couple is able to survive such pressure from close and outsiders, many simply break down and diverge after a series of ridicule and accusations. Despite all this, many married couples, where a wife is older than her husband for 10 years, manage to build a long, harmonious relationship. If people have a common goal, if they are both passionate about something and immensely respect each other, then of course there are chances to create a happy family.
Female older than 20 years
Everyone understands what motivates a woman who wants to go outmarry a man 20 years younger than himself. I want to feel attractive and loved at any age. In addition, no one repealed the saying "In 45 baba berry again." At this age, a mature, interesting woman is quite capable of turning a young cavalier's head. But we must understand that very few young people who do not suffer from the Oedipus complex can spend their whole lives with an aging lady. Here, either the guy has a mercantile interest, forcing to close his eyes to the appearance of his wife, or an internal psychological problem. Both do little to promote a happy marriage. All of us with curiosity watch news about famous women at a respectable age, changing men like gloves. And in our country, and abroad there are a lot of ladies who do not get in the way by the difference in age of 20 and more years for the creation of a family. That's just say about such pairs of "lived happily ever after" is quite difficult, simply because examples of this - a unit. We can recall only a few historical examples of such happy marriages, where the spouses overcame all difficulties of unequal age and were happy. For example, the famous Anna Kern (the same one Pushkin dedicated to his poetry) married Alexander Markov-Vinogradsky, who was younger than her exactly for 20 years. They lived together for 40 years and died in one year. Or Edith Piaf, whose last love is the young Theofanis Lambucas, who is 20 years younger than herself. A year after the wedding, the singer died, leaving her lover with some debts, but the end of her life he adored his Edith and literally wore in his arms (she could not walk). Yes, such marriages are happy, but very, very rare. Sometimes spouses are submitted for divorce one year after the wedding, and an absolutely unequal age marriage, which by all rules should not be successful, exists for many, many years. Perhaps the optimal age difference is a deeply subjective concept, and each has its own. The main thing is love, mutual respect and a similar view of the world, and then even the biggest difference in ages will not prevent your man from being the best husband in the world. We advise you to read: