Is there a friendship between a girl and a guy: is the mission impossible?

Women themselves can answer this question unequivocally.They can't. Some say that there is and even cite their friendly relationships with classmates and fellow students at the institute as examples. Others seriously think about whether there can be friendship between a guy and a girl, seeing a lot of contradictory life examples. Still others categorically state that it does not exist, that all such relationships are based on sexual attraction. So it is simply necessary to understand this issue and find out whether friendship exists, what it can be and why it is needed at all. We suggest starting with the opinion of psychologists and determining whether such feelings can connect guys and girls, men and women. People who say that truly good friends of different sexes simply do not exist, usually argue their opinion with physiology. Thus, they claim that male sympathy towards a woman in most cases is based on condescension and the desire to please. In other words, a young guy, fulfilling the girl's wishes, helping her at work and in everyday situations, listening to all her personal secrets, always tries to impress and become more than just a friend. Considering the situation from this angle, we can come to the conclusion that all relationships between people of different sexes are initially mixed with the desire for sex. But you should not think that friendship between a guy and a girl is impossible, because there is a second point of view on this issue, which, by the way, is adhered to by most psychologists. Experts are sure that two people of different sexes do not necessarily have to be just friends communicating in the same company. Yes, a guy and a girl can be great friends, and this fact is explained very simply. Each of us, regardless of gender, enjoys pleasant communication. It, in turn, is based on mutual interests, hobbies, principles. And if the communication of a guy and a girl is exactly like that, that is, pleasant, it inevitably brings them closer together. Two people begin to worry about each other, show care, provide support. What is this if not friendship? Of course, over time it can become love or, on the contrary, break off (unfortunately, this also happens, but such is life). By the way, an ironclad argument in favor of an affirmative answer to the question of whether friendship between a guy and a girl exists is the fact that every representative of the fair sex needs such a relationship. Yes, modern psychologists emphasize that any beauty, even one who has no end to enthusiastic admirers, needs a male friend. Such a relationship with a person of the opposite sex will be useful in several ways at once.

Why should a girl be friends with a guy?

There is no competition between friends of different sexes, noconstant comparison. Any girlfriends, even the oldest, good, cool ones, constantly at least in something, but focus on each other. In life, it often happens that a girl, albeit not openly, but at a subconscious level, compares herself with a friend and looks at which of the two is more beautiful, who has more solid fans, who is more successful in their personal life and career. In conditions of such competition, especially when losing, a girl cannot or does not want to trust all her secrets to a woman close to her. But with a man - easily. A guy is not a competitor - he simply cannot compete with a girl on any of the above points. By building and developing friendly relations with a man, a woman can feel confident.

A young and handsome guy can be greata companion for going somewhere. By showing up with a handsome man at a corporate party, a girl can irritate gossipy co-workers. In addition, this is a great way to prove your attractiveness and sense of taste: by coming with a gorgeous gentleman, a woman also shows that she was able to interest him in something. And it is no longer so important that this companion is not actually an enthusiastic admirer, but a friend - no one will find out about this. In addition, by showing up at an event with a cute guy, you can make someone jealous: it often happens that the presence of another gentleman, that is, a competitor, makes a man act more decisively.

A man has a different psychology, so he cangive advice in a situation where even a best friend would be powerless. Moreover, in many life situations, the most useful thing is the opinion of a guy who looks at a girl objectively, and not through the prism of a love relationship. So, a friend can calmly say that this blouse does not suit her, that she needs to lose weight or gain weight. With him, a woman will at least know how men perceive her.

It's convenient to be friends with a guy at least becausevariety. When girlfriends with all their problems get boring, it's just nice to chat with a person who has other concerns. It's no secret that men live by other interests, so you can always find new topics for conversation with them. In addition, guys are more relaxed about communication: you don't need to call them every day, they won't be offended if you forget to ask how they are doing today. It often happens that friends of different sexes do not meet and do not talk to each other for quite a long time (for example, a week, two, three). But when they start communicating, there are always enough topics for conversation, and two people get real pleasure from sharing news and opinions.

For many girls, being friends with a man is still convenientand from a practical point of view. You can always ask a guy to nail a shelf, make a socket, move cabinets and other heavy furniture. A friend will not refuse to help, and in return you can feed him a delicious lunch or dinner. And do not doubt, relationships based on practicality are most often strong, and not strained and cool. This is exactly the case when stormy passions are replaced by even feelings of affection and respect.

In short, friendship with a guy is convenient for a girl - shemay well arise and last for a long time, almost a lifetime. But you need to understand that such relationships have their own "pitfalls". It happens that circumstances arise between a guy and a girl that destroy the strongest friendship. Therefore, you need to pay attention to the possible nuances of such relationships.

What can destroy the friendship between the girl and the guy?

Changes in personal life - of course, for some of usfriends (or both) sooner or later have a soulmate. And it often happens that this new person cannot understand or accept such a friendship - he begins to be jealous, wants more attention to himself. It may even come to demands to stop such close communication with the opposite sex. Of course, the opposite situation often happens, when a girl lives with a boyfriend or husband, and she has a new friend (for example, a dance partner, an employee or any other person with whom she has become close for some reason). In this case, quarrels, resentments, scandals are also possible. Therefore, it is important to understand that changes in personal life can also destroy friendship, because when choosing between two people, not every woman will give up her future husband for the sake of a good friend, and not every man will leave his other half for a girlfriend.
"Masks", that is, cases when a guy is actuallyin fact, he is an admirer who is ready to wait for his chance for years. Such a person can only “play” friendship: when some changes occur in the girl’s personal life (for example, a breakup with a boyfriend or a divorce from her husband), he will immediately offer his candidacy. However, it often happens that a man wants something more, but is ready to be a friend, just not to lose the woman dear to his heart. The “mask” can be different, but the very fact of its presence can destroy friendship. Especially when the girl is not ready to continue to communicate so closely with a man who is unrequitedly in love with her.
Breakdowns during a “lull” in your personal life.If a man and a woman communicate closely for a long time, they discuss sex topics quite freely. Moreover, true friends always share problems, talk about the state of affairs on the personal front. And in appropriate circumstances (both have simply not had sex for a long time, young people got into a romantic atmosphere, relaxed, drank) it happens that an evening devoted to communication ends in a stormy night. But the next day, the consequences will not take long to appear. Perhaps, the guy and the girl will become a couple in love, get married and live happily in marriage. Maybe they will date for a short time and break up, but maintaining and even strengthening their friendly relations, because they will have even more common moments. But it also happens that after such casual sex, a man and a woman begin to feel awkward. They try not to touch on this topic or call everything that happened a mistake, tension grows between them, they begin to communicate and meet less often. As a result, the warmth of their relationship gradually fades. The latter option is something to keep in mind, even if you're not against casual sex with friends.

Close and long-term communication between young peoplepeople of different sexes is always associated with a number of nuances. So, the question of whether friendship between a guy and a girl is possible can be answered affirmatively only with a reservation. Yes, it exists, but only when each of them strives to respect the other person, when both of them are connected by mutual interests, communicate easily and strive to be friends, and not lovers, ordinary acquaintances or business partners. We recommend reading: