Ask any person who has had an affair.at work, why he needs it and how, in fact, he managed to start an affair in such an inappropriate place. We are sure that in nine cases out of ten you will hear the following answer: “It just happened that way…” While psychologists cannot agree on why people decide to have affairs and cheating (after all, most often, family people get carried away with romances at work, at least one of the couple is in a relationship), experts agree that this does not happen by chance. At some point, at some level, the choice was made consciously. Agree, if you enter into a romantic relationship with someone, then you first had to decide that you were going to do it. No one could force you! And you hesitated (before making such a decision) for a reason. You should have understood perfectly well that if the hidden becomes obvious, a lot of trouble awaits you - gossip and condemnation from employees, complaints from management, problems in your own family. And if you haven't made a rash move yet, we want to urge you to be careful and not to start any non-official relationships in the office. Perhaps you haven't even thought about anything like that, but you feel that some male co-workers are paying you extra attention, clearly going beyond their official duties. How should you behave in such a case? How can you resist temptations?

How to prevent unnecessary relationships in the office

Try to adhere to the following ten rules of your behavior in the workplace:

Never get emotionally close to someone.a colleague of the opposite sex, especially if you or your colleague are family people. Infidelity can insidiously creep into even the strongest partnerships. Even if you have not allowed yourself anything specific, but simply felt that you are not completely indifferent to your employee, it is worth sounding the alarm! Psychologists who conducted a survey among six and a half thousand women found that 92% of them believe that cheating occurs on an emotional level, even when physical intimacy has not yet occurred. And only 8% of the women surveyed believed that they do not cheat on their husbands, feeling sympathy for another man.

Keep all friendships outside the office.Since all office romances start with simple emotional attachment, we want to warn you that even the most harmless friendship at work has enough potential to turn into something more.

N never drink alcohol in the company of employeesDrinking alcohol during or after a work day with a colleague of the opposite sex is one of the fastest ways to start relationships at work, because alcohol leads to a decrease in your control over yourself and removes all prohibitions. Even if you just drink a cocktail or a glass of wine during a business lunch, this can lead to more intimate conversations and your inadequate behavior.

It is precisely because you are a woman that you should beespecially cautious You probably don't even think about any romances at work; but that doesn't mean that some of your male colleagues don't dream of having an affair with you. Men consciously try to stay as close as possible to attractive women, try to invite them to lunch, etc., precisely because they want to find an opportunity to date them. Try to avoid such situations that can contribute to the emergence of emotional connections.

Don't schedule meetings outside the office ifit is assumed that you will be alone with a member of the opposite sex If you are serious about your reputation, then always take with you, for example, one of your girlfriends, if you need to see one of your male co-workers outside the office. Try to plan all your meetings so that they are group meetings, because this helps to reduce the intimacy factor.

When you are in the office, never forget:This is work, nothing personal can happen here. The office is for business, not for gossip or romantic adventures. Do not allow any flirting, do not wear too revealing clothes, try to look and act like a professional, not like a flirtatious young lady.

If you, despite all your efforts to leadyourself according to all the rules, but still feel attracted to your colleague, try to soberly think about your situation. What could your secret affair at work lead to? What troubles could exposure cause? What do you lack in your own marriage? Excitement? A deep emotional connection? If so, then analyze your marriage and find out why it happened that you lack something. If you do not do this, the most unpleasant thing can happen - you will fall head over heels in love with your new chosen one, but there is no guarantee that he is ready to change his whole life for you! As most often happens, everything will be forgiven him, but you can lose everything - your new love, your family, and even your job.

You must be aware that a man,who wants to have a relationship with you, most likely, treats it completely differently than you do. Unfortunately, it is only for us, women, that an emotional connection is important when we enter into intimate relationships. But men who incite their pretty co-workers to numerous romances at work (can you be sure that this is your chosen one’s first and only romance at work?), in most cases are only looking for sex, and nothing more. What won’t they say to convince you to give him both your soul and body! But you must understand that you should not always take this seriously.

Keep your emotional boundaries closedspaces Don't share too much personal information with colleagues of the opposite sex in your office, no matter how friendly you think their attitude towards you may be. All intimate details should remain only between you and your partner. Don't forget that in women, emotional infidelity too often leads to physical infidelity! If a conversation with a co-worker becomes too intimate, try to politely steer the conversation in another direction, related to professional issues. Erect barriers when you feel that a man is trying to get closer to you.

Work on your relationship with your spouseNo matter how tempting a workplace affair may be, you may pay too much for this infatuation; therefore, avoiding it would be the best option. So, get out of the “cloud” of your hormones that are clouding your brain and stop thinking only about yourself. Remember that you have a family, a beloved husband, and do not plunge yourself and him into emotional stress and suffering.

How to hide a novel at work

When people spend at least 100 hours in one officeat least six to seven hours a day, it is not surprising that workplace romances flare up between co-workers from time to time. You may think that your emotions can be contained, but love never asks for permission, and romance can flare up unexpectedly. That is why workplace romances are not so rare. But management, if they hear about such cases, is usually very unhappy with this turn of events, because they believe that these relationships interfere with productivity. So what should you do if you, too, have to become one of those who has been overtaken by love at the office? Here are some tips to help you keep your romance a secret:

• Always conduct yourself professionally at work.Try not to touch each other, do not linger around without doing anything, for intimate conversations, and leave flirting for a more suitable place. Romance is the last thing that should occupy your thoughts at work. So always remember: even if you know what kind of underwear your chosen one wears, this does not mean that in the office you can behave like close people, and not like employees.
• If your passion keeps you from staying far awayapart all day long, plan your meetings so as not to be caught off guard. You don’t want anyone to see you kissing behind a safe or a filing cabinet. If you really want to chat right now, choose a spot on an empty stairwell. And if you’re planning a meeting outside of work hours, choose a place away from work. Keep in mind that it’s better to get there separately, because nothing will arouse your colleagues’ suspicions more than if you go somewhere away from the office together.
• Don't forget to cover your tracks, as they say.Leave no evidence of your romantic relationship with your coworker. This could be anything from undeleted emails to lipstick stains on his shirt. Incidentally, avoid forwarding emails to each other from work computers, as it’s only a matter of time before one of you accidentally sends a private message to the wrong address.
• Ignore the gossip It may happen thatsomeone will really suspect something about your affair. Do not under any circumstances start making excuses or denying rumors. It is better to show with your whole appearance that this topic is not even worth mentioning, not to mention the absolutely identical dresses that two employees from the neighboring department bought.

How to finish an affair with a colleague

You already know that romantic relationships withcolleague can have serious consequences for your career and emotional well-being, and things are even more difficult if one or both of you have families. And if you decide to end a risky relationship, we'll tell you how to do it in a way that minimizes the potential damage:

• Understand that the cessation of those who provoke infidelityRelationships are the best that you can do. You can feel a deep emotional connection with your colleague, but do not put your family at risk.
• Try to distance yourself from your partner in the novel. Stop calling him affectionate names and nicknames, try to have your routes in the office intersected as rarely as possible.
• Agree to meet with a colleague at work inA quiet environment where no one will disturb you. Explain to him that you want to end your relationship, because you do not want to destroy families and hurt your close people. Also tell him that you must stop all relationships, except workers, even friends. You should clearly dot the i's.
• Delete his number from the phone and delete all contacts from social networks. It is very important to no longer have any connection with him.
• In the most extreme case, it is even necessary to change the place of work. Especially if your romance is still made public and this can seriously threaten your reputation.

There are not many situations that couldcomplicate your life more than infidelity in marriage and an affair at work. It can be very difficult to end an affair, especially if it happened with a colleague at work, where you spend more time than at home. However, it is something you must do if you want to save your family and your good name.

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