A jealous husband, how to deal with this?

Jealous husband…. How often does this occur even in our seemingly free from conventions time! What to do, free morals or not free, and jealousy - quality ineradicable, inherent in almost every person. No, some people even like it: they are jealous of their beloved or beloved, which means they love. But when jealousy passes all the boundaries and a violent stream of emotions may well go into assault, it's not to the point of joy. And the wife's wife, frightened by the aggression, involuntarily raises the question: I have a jealous husband, how to deal with this? And really, how to fight and can we fight at all? Let's see what the nature of male jealousy is based on and what can be done to minimize it.

Nature of male jealousy

There is an opinion that men are jealous becausevery afraid to lose your favorite woman. This is partly true. We are all a little jealous, and we all are afraid of losing a loved one. Only someone is able to control their emotions and be jealous in secret, and someone openly declares their (often completely groundless) suspicions. In principle, jealousy is inherent in humans genetically, and it is completely impossible to destroy it. In this case, female and male jealousy has different nature. We will not talk about female jealousy now. It's about the nature of jealousy of men. Generally jealous men can be divided into two types. The first is people with a sense of inferiority, the second is jealous with a sense of losing power over property. In the first case, men need a constant feeling that you are recognized, wish, and therefore sufficiently self-sufficient. To receive such sensation they can only at a stable sexual life with the woman who has preferred to others this this man. In the second - these are male leaders, winners, for whom loss is unacceptable. Why are they jealous even in cases where the woman's faithfulness is obvious? Often jealous people can change themselves and are inclined to attribute the same behavior to their beloved. Often jealousy arises from the fear that a woman can find herself a man younger, prettier, stronger, richer and so on. Such men are not sure of their social and physiological viability. As for the men-leaders, they consider the woman their trophy, which no one intends to give. "Well, good," one of the women will say, "It's all clear. But my husband is very jealous. How to live with him? "

Living with a jealous husband

Men's jealousy in normal dosages happenseven pleasant. However, an overly jealous husband is a big problem for a woman. Everything begins usually with trifles. At first the spouse seems to be casually interested in what his dearest half was doing today, where and with whom he was and so on. Then he seems to accidentally meet her from work. Find out whether there are male employees, who is single, who is more or less attractive, who is sociable, who is not. All. That's enough. You can already expect from this man uncontrollable bouts of jealousy. Especially if we had the imprudence to tell him about our past connections. If the husband can not cope with his jealousy, his wife has to tight. Not only does the husband follow her every step and arrange scandals over any trifles, he also comes up with various reasons for scandal. And then, as you behave yourself, peace will still not be. Even if the wife will be unable to sit in four walls, an overly jealous husband will pry her to the cat. Such an unenviable fate ... It would seem that it's much easier - to get divorced from a jealous person. And a point. Today, divorce is not a problem. However, this problem is far from always so easily solved. Often, the wife still loves her jealous-faithful, and the family has children who adore the pope. Sometimes the woman is financially dependent on her husband and is afraid to remain poor. And sometimes she is afraid of himself, because jealous people who lose the object of their jealousy, can become uncontrollable. The most unpleasant thing in this matter is that often wives, long under the constant psychological pressure of a jealous husband, lose confidence in themselves and the ability to take independent action. They become indecisive, distrustful, notorious, in their guise, oppression and alertness are guessed. Unreasonable suspicions of her husband, his insults and the desire to humiliate instill in such a woman the conviction that she really does not need anyone and without him will disappear. It is sad that the poor thing is often really attractive, not stupid and, if desired, quite in demand among the stronger sex. There are also such women who try to take revenge on her husband for unreasonable suspicions and insults with the help of real betrayal. Like, I'm wasting all this, I can not stand it! Now, at least, for what! I must say that the reception is quite dangerous. The spouse can learn about the real betrayal of the wife, and it is not known what it will turn out for her then. In addition, communication on the side for a woman is often associated with other troubles. Unwanted pregnancies, for example, or venereal disease, if the connections are random. Yes, and a constant lover to have risky. A man can become attached to a woman and present her rights to her. And it's good if she does not mind associating her life with him. And if not? In a word, problems, problems, problems ... So how to be?

Very jealous husband. How to behave

Yes, a very jealous husband is a huge problem. From a loving and gentle man, he can instantly turn into a hateful and very dangerous person. And the power of jealousy often does not depend on the power of love or on the presence of real rivals. In a man, she can arise simply out of a feeling of envy for another man, because of dissatisfaction in intimate life, because of unrealized life, out of a sense of property and so on. After all they are often jealous of wives not only to other men, but also to friends, to children, to parents, even to pets. The wife should belong to him only, and the point! Jealousy is dangerous because it can deprive a person of reason, sweep everything in its path and push it to completely inadequate actions. Therefore, if the husband is too jealous, the best way out will still be to part with him. Otherwise, one day a disaster may happen. However, as we have already said, it is not always possible to part. Yes, and do not always want, because jealous people can have a lot of virtues. But now, jealous, they lose their heads, they stop thinking and bear such things that they will never allow themselves in their right minds. Well, what to do then ... Just adjust! How? How to live with a jealous husband? To begin with, it's easy to talk calmly with him at the first signs of an aggressive manifestation of jealousy. We can explain that we are also often jealous of him, but we do not allow ourselves such antics. And in general, he is the most golden, the best, and we belong only to him. However, sometimes, if the spouse is hot-tempered and emotional, and conversations are not required. He departs, realizes that he has done and he himself is reproaching for what he has done. In this case, a jealous believer can simply be caressed and translated into a joke. In general, to find out the relationship with her husband and try to prove something at a time when a volcano of jealousy is raging inside him, in no event. Even a calm and reserved person in such a state can cross borders. At such moments people lose their sense of conscience, compassion, justice. Therefore, if the husband suddenly exploded, overwhelmed by jealousy, it's better to keep silent or just try to come up, hug, calm. Often, caressing here helps a lot more than trying to justify yourself. The spouses of jealous men are always on a powder keg. It can explode on the slightest occasion, and without any reason too. Therefore, about any flirting with other men, about any talk about them or about their past adventures, even in a joking tone, and there can be no talk. Even if the spouse initially and keeps his emotions, he will wind himself, and the rage sooner or later breaks out. Her outburst may not be like jealousy, - her husband will start picking on unwashed dishes, not sewn on a button, under-salted soup, and so on. If he objects, the faithful will get mad, and then just hold on. So, be careful, be careful and caution again. In general, trying to deal with the excessive jealousy of her husband is useless. You can spend a lot of energy and energy on it, but there will be no result. Even if a woman becomes a saint, a jealous husband will always find an occasion for jealousy. The only way out here is to have a sincere desire to change. And for this it is necessary to determine the cause of such unbridled jealousy. We will not talk about unfaithful wives. In relation to them, jealousy is justified. If the wife is true, but the husband still can not control himself, then the reason is in him. What is it? Diffidence? A sense of ownership, a desire for power? Fear of losing a woman, feeling of worthlessness, uselessness? It is enough to find this cause, and the knot will untie. If, in outbursts of jealousy, a person's actions go beyond all boundaries, one should be alert. Chances are great that a man has mental problems. And he needs appropriate treatment. Because he can not cope on his own with outbursts of rage, even realizing in a calm state that it becomes dangerous for close people. Here the help of the psychotherapist is already necessary. The feeling of jealousy is generally illogical. When we really love a person, why do we get irritated, make scandals and hurt him? And if we do not love, then why should we be jealous of someone else? Yes, in the event that it is a question of real betrayal in the family, it is not very jealous to be jealous. Then it hurts. Because it is unnatural. But jealousy is not a cure. She only wounds her wounds, forcing her not only to remember the details of treason for the hundredth time, but also to invent new ones. How to deal with it? Try to hate your own jealousy, because it destroys us and prevents us from living. Let him clean and leave in peace our soul and our family well-being! We advise you to read: