What is written on the faces of lovers waitingtheir turn to register their marriage? Love, happiness, pride (of course, because the best person in the world is nearby). But the most important feeling that unites the newlyweds is confidence in the future. They are all convinced that their marriage will stand the test of time, everyday life, children. But time passes, and the question of “how to preserve love” increasingly spins in the heads of experienced wives. Why wives? Because men, as a rule, do not bother with such problems. They believe that if a woman opened the door for them after a hard day at work and laid the table for them to eat, then everything is fine. Well, let's leave men in their usual world, and we ourselves will talk about love. Is it possible to prolong it? Make it brighter against the background of gray everyday life? Or is any marriage doomed? Let's figure it out. First, let me reassure all those who believe that it is impossible to preserve love. Everything is in your hands. And if you want this particular man to be with you until the end of your days, then so it will be. And we will teach you how to do this.

Ideal people do not exist

As girls we dreamed of a handsome princea white horse, who is always neatly dressed, well-fed and with flowers. In real life, it turns out that the potential groom wore swimming trunks only for you, and now he prefers knee-length boxer shorts. That it is better not to kiss him in the morning (until he brushes his teeth). That his horse eats more oats than carries. Stop, stop, stop. And now look at yourself. Don't you think that your hair has long since lost that "natural" splendor that you diligently achieved before dates? And your mouth in the morning does not smell like roses either. The list can be continued endlessly. But why? Is it really so difficult to love a person as he is? Does your husband forgive you your weaknesses? You don't have any? And the tenth bottle of perfume this month? Exactly. So do not take off your rose-colored glasses immediately after the wedding. Believe me, it is much easier to preserve love in them. And be more indulgent to your husband's weaknesses. And he will reciprocate.

Trust is primarily

Tell me, do you like it when someone digs intoyour things? No? Then why do you regularly check your husband's mobile phone? And don't tell me you do it for insurance. Your husband will tell you everything you need to know. Trust him. There is no love without trust. Otherwise, you will end up finding what you were looking for in your spouse's phone. Or at least that's how it will seem to you. A strange call in your outgoing messages or an incomprehensible text message in your journal - everything will be interpreted by you as "I told you so." And then what? A scandal? A divorce? Is this what you were trying to achieve? We are sure that you didn't. Therefore, instead of checking your husband's mobile phone with trembling hands, make him some coffee. This step will help preserve love much better than any suspicions.

Apologize

What's a family without scandals?Everyone argues from time to time. Perhaps, this quality unites all families. The difference is in how they make peace with each other. There are couples who can go for weeks without talking to each other. And during these seven days, they are not concerned with how to preserve love, but with defending their own rightness. We will reveal one big secret to you: in an argument, no one is right. Both are guilty. So why not admit it and take a step towards halfway? And pride has nothing to do with it. You maintain an atmosphere of love in the house. Believe me, this is more important than a fleeting argument about nothing. By the way, if you do need to defend your point of view, we advise you to do it soberly. First, calm down, analyze what happened and only then start the conversation. Did you notice that the word "scandal" was not there? You can dot the "i's" without raising your voice at your spouse. Start with your own experiences. Describe what feelings you had to endure in this situation. Do not blame your husband. This will not help. Do you often admit that you are wrong? So how is your husband better than you?

Praise your husband

But what you need to do with the excess is this:praise. Therefore, if you want to preserve love, look for virtues in your spouse. Did he help you wash the dishes? Thank him. Did he nail a shelf? Be sure to note this. And it doesn’t matter that he should have done this six months ago. You’ll see - as soon as you start praising your husband, not only will your relationship improve, but he will also help you more often. There is another quality that distinguishes modern wives. They are used to scolding their spouse in front of everyone, and praising him in their ear so that no one can hear. Do the opposite, and your family will definitely become stronger. Celebrate your husband’s virtues in front of strangers. Tell your children how lucky they are to have their father. And you yourself will not notice how, many years later, you will celebrate a noisy golden wedding. Because men do not abandon such women. Well, with whom else will he feel so irreplaceable, smart, handsome and brave? After all, he himself did not even suspect all the virtues that you ascribe to him.

Be an example

Do you know what modern husbands lack?The ability to read our minds. Then they would definitely buy us red roses instead of carnations on March 8, they would offer to wash the dishes after breakfast, and they would never eat with such an appetite when visiting (as if they were not fed at home). And most importantly, they would always arrange a romantic candlelit dinner when we are sad. But, unfortunately (or fortunately, since you still hid the purchase of the fifth pair of nylon tights this week) our husbands do not know how to read minds. And sometimes you really want romance! Well, arrange it yourself! Put a note with confessions in your husband's pocket, buy him an unexpected gift, book a table at a restaurant. Believe me, your happiness is in your hands. And while you are waiting for surprises from your husband, an eternity will pass. You remember that they think and feel a little differently, right? By the way, hints will not help either. Only direct text. But agree that after "begging" for a romantic dinner, its value is sharply reduced? So go for it! Be an example for your husband and the architect of your own family well-being.

Pronounce grievances

However, even ideal wives upset their husbands.In the same way, spouses are not always attentive enough to their other half. Years go by, grievances accumulate. And what yesterday seemed like a harmless trifle, today grows into a problem of universal proportions. Scattered socks, an unopened tube of toothpaste, a raised toilet seat - you can go on forever. But all these problems will remain problems if you do not talk about them. After all, preserving love turns out to be much more difficult than acquiring it. During your honeymoon, your husband's guilty smile was enough for you to forgive a small shortcoming. Today, a wave of discontent more and more often rolls over your head. Right? Then it's time to talk to your husband frankly. Only then will the socks at least find their way to the dirty laundry bin for a week. And the toothpaste... Well, forgive him this small sin. In the morning, we are all a little absent-minded.

A word is not a sparrow

A small afterword to the previous rule fromof the "how to save love" code. Sometimes wives describe their husband's misdeeds so colorfully that you can't help but sympathize with the guilty party. How many names they call the man with whom they have lived for many years! And this is for an ordinary pair of socks under the sofa or a forgotten toilet seat. Dear women, the "speak out the insult" rule provides only for a correct attitude towards a man. Otherwise, you will not only fail to save love, but also nip it in the bud. Think about it, is your behavior ideal enough? Of course not. So why doesn't your husband allow himself such insults? And one more thing: if the man with whom you have lived for many years is a goat, then who are you? Finish this comparison yourself and understand that insults need to be eradicated, and not rooted even more in the soil of marital hatred.

Do not compare

Here it is - the curse of all married marriages.When Vasya, a stranger from the next door, becomes an object of constant comparison. His car is better, he greets his neighbors more often, and his salary is higher. At the same time, the facts that Vasya served time for robbery five years ago, and he beats his wife mercilessly are not taken into account. The main thing is to reproach. And then, you see, your own husband will reach for a used foreign car or finally ask for a raise. In order to understand how such comparisons end, it is enough to remember the line from the Bible: "an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth." And now you are compared to busty Vika, your husband's childhood friend, or Aunt Masha, whose pies (unlike you) never burn. So how is it? Is it nice? All you had to do was hold your tongue. In fact, there are many more rules. Just as there are problems in marriage. And there is no single solution to maintaining warm relations between spouses. But there is one indispensable condition that, like cement, holds marriages together even in the strongest storms of life. This is the desire to be together. It happens that one of the spouses begins to distance itself. And then the other partner, instead of being offended, should analyze their past life and understand what pushed the person away. Why is there a coldness of disappointment in their eyes instead of love? Sometimes this requires the help of a professional psychologist, which is neglected by modern couples. And this is strange. You go to the dentist if you have a toothache, right? So why not cure the marriage? Especially since this is more important than a filling. Do you agree?

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