Remember how it was easy to make friends in childhood? You approach the boy or girl you like and say: "Let's be friends!" And all, you are friends. And now? A lot of difficulties in the form of inflated expectations, social norms and some incomprehensible conditions. And more and more often loneliness. How to find friends and not be left alone in this crazy, insane world?

Friend - this sounds proudly!

Surely, each of you has friends, andthere are even a lot of them. But have you ever wondered what "friend" means to you? This value can be different. And it changes not only from person to person, but also from situation to situation and over time. In childhood, it was easy to find new friends - it was enough to play together in kulichiki. Then you slowly began to understand that the game is a game, but the one who first builds kulichiki with you, and then secretly destroys them - is not a very good friend. But what it should be, is not yet clear, and not so important. Already in adolescence, a friend is someone with whom there are similar interests and a lot of time spent together. We are experiencing the first mistakes and quarrels, and by the time of their youth, their own ideas of friendship are slowly emerging. The older we become, the more important are the moral and spiritual qualities of friends. This is due to the fact that an adult is experiencing many different life situations, including difficult ones, and especially appreciates a real strong friendship. Less important are appearance and musical tastes, but sympathy and sympathy come to the fore. As a rule, for an adult person in a "friend" several roles coexist. A friend is:

• one who supports you;
• one who shares your values, worldview and attitude;
• the one with whom you are having fun;
• the one with whom you share common interests;
• he who hears you and understands you;
• the one who respects you;
• one who helps you in difficult situations and not only.

If in your life there are people who gathered inwe congratulate you, because you are a happy person! However, this is very rare. In most cases, we are supported by some people, but we have fun with others. And sometimes it happens that friendship is not glued at all. And what should I do? How to find real friends or at least one such friend?

Habitat

You decided to make friends. No, not like a cat or a dog, just you want to change or expand the circle of communication. But in order to communicate with these new people, they must first be met. And then the question arises: where to find friends? The habitat of potential friends depends a lot on what new people you want to meet.

• Toy Library

Let's remember the childhood! As we already mentioned above, the strongest binding force for us was the game. Why not use this technique now? In many cities there are such gaming parties - as a rule, they are organized by shops selling table games, clubs and bars. Participate in such an event - and have fun, and talk to the glory!

• Clubs and bars

Most often, of course, in such places guysget acquainted with the girls. But why not look for friends there? In any case, it will be fun and pleasant. Night institutions are different in that any conversation is easy to start with a joke or a funny comment on the person you like. But you may have difficulties with translating such a "gay" friendship into a more serious channel (although not a fact!)

• Communities of Interest

One of the most promising options isplan that you communicate with those people with whom you have much in common. For example, if you are a young mother, you can enroll in a family center for courses and communicate there with other young mothers, which can grow into joint festivities with children, shopping trips and much more. After all, you have a huge common interest and an occasion for communication - children! But the children did not get along with the wedge - you can combine your favorite TV series, culinary experiments, reading literature - there are a lot of such things. Look for such communities through the Internet (for example, on forums or through social networks) - and communicate there with like-minded people.

• Actually the Internet

Well absolutely impossible in our era of technologydo not mention this option to meet people! The Internet has everything, including people. But people, unfortunately, and fortunately, are completely different. You can find a lot of friends who share your views on life, your interests and love for carrots in Korean, but you can run into schoolboys, scammers or just crazy. Therefore, be careful when communicating on the Internet, and observe basic safety rules.

• Friendly party

This option is absolutely safe withpsychological point of view. Being invited to a party, you already know the hosts and are not afraid to be left alone on this holiday of life. If you want to meet someone, you can easily ask your common buddies to introduce you. Communication is accompanied by music and cocktails, which makes it easy, fun and enjoyable, and also has to its continuation in the future.

• Study

It would seem that not the most optimal place for that,to make friends. But this is not so! For example, if you are attending an English course, you and the other members of the group share a common goal - to know a foreign language well. And you can help each other in this - in particular, meet before the courses for a cup of coffee and talk only in English. Spending time in this way, you will know each other better, and most likely, someone from your new acquaintances will be interesting and pleasant in communication. So do not be lazy and strive to spend time with benefit!

• Sports activities

It can be a gym or embankment,which you are doing jogging - it does not matter. You with other same people are united by physical activity and joint interest - to be healthy or lose weight. In addition, it is more fun to do sports together - for example, to ride a bicycle and discuss the latest fashion trends.

If a friend was suddenly ...

Finding friends is not the most difficult thing. It is much more difficult to maintain long and warm relations with them and to maintain your strong friendship. And now many people have certain difficulties with this. We often make demands on others that we can barely manage ourselves. We are angry with friends who fail us, although sometimes we ourselves sin the same. We condemn, although we ourselves demand unconditional acceptance and sympathy from others. Unfortunately, such double standards are not uncommon these days. And the worst thing is for those who try to live in them - it's these people who are increasingly lonely on the sidelines of life. How to avoid this and strengthen relationships with new friends? What qualities need to develop in yourself, communicating with friends?

• Interest

Stretch out to other people and be interested in their lives. Few need a conceited beech, which at all do not care. Remember what Dale Carnegie said: "A person is a being who likes to talk about himself more than anything else in the world." So ask your friends about how they live, what's going on and what interests them. Ask about the important things for them at every meeting. Talk about them and their lives, and then it will be a signal that they are not indifferent and valuable to you.

• Patience

Be tolerant with your friends; each ofwe have our minuses: someone chews loudly, someone abuses word-parasites, and someone becomes crazy after the third cocktail. With most of the shortcomings can be reconciled, because they are not really so important for your friendship. Therefore, separate these things from really important obstacles and close their eyes, otherwise you risk losing many standing people and remain alone.

• Responsiveness

Friends are in many ways necessary tohad someone to call at two o'clock in the morning and say: "I'm very ill. Come! "And a real friend will come, bring a bottle of martini and make it so that all was well. And this is not an exaggeration! Be mentally prepared for such actions, because they are put aside in memory: "And I remember how Irka at that time seriously helped me, although she did not have time!" Even if you miss something, helping friends, it will pay off a hundredfold in a kind of trust to each other and a sense of a strong rear.

• Readiness to compromise

Friendship is at least two or morepeople who decided to make friends. And these people may have different opinions on some issues. For example, your girlfriend believes that the best birthday is a party in the club, and you turn from loud music and smell of cigarettes. But you go, because this is your girlfriend and it's her birthday. And she, in turn, goes with you to the sushi bar, making you a company for eating raw fish she hated her. During a long friendly relationship, such compromises become so much that they are no longer considered and go to meet their friend just like that.

• Honesty

But, on a compromise, we must not forget abouthonesty in a relationship. In the relations of real friends there is always a place for her. This does not mean the complete absence of lies - it is not at all necessary to tell your girlfriend that her husband is a complete fool. But the fact that you are not very comfortable from the fact that you constantly spend time together, it's worth saying. In general, friends should talk about their feelings and emotions, even if scary and uncomfortable. On that they are friends and to share with them the most important and intimate.

• Support

She is very important in friendship. After all, who, if not a real friend, will support in the most insane undertakings! If your girlfriend decided to join the Sorbonne or become a participant in the Formula 1 race, support her. In most situations, honesty is not needed (unless you are absolutely convinced that it completely destroys your life). And if it does not work out, then console her. This is the real support. Only friends and the closest people, thanks to their support, help us to find a way out of the most difficult situations.

• Be yourself

You, probably, will say: "Six tips on how to find friends, someone of yourself portraying, and the last - be yourself? Delirium! "But this is not so, because you do not need to be someone else. It kills sincerity in a relationship and is almost always felt. Be yourself, develop your interests and dignity and allow yourself to have shortcomings. Just sometimes try to direct your behavior in the right direction so that your friends are with you well. All these points can be combined in one - treat others as you want them to treat you. And this is right, because each of us gets what he deserves. Friendship is a garden that requires constant care, effort and resources. If you do not spend time in it and do not cultivate it - it overgrows with weeds and ceases to be a garden. So take the time and energy to find and save your friends, and this will be your most reliable investment! We advise you to read:

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