The twenty-first century dictates such a franticrhythm of life, that the number of illnesses, nervous breakdowns and mental disorders is simply off the charts. You have probably noticed that there are practically no moments left when you feel in harmony with the world around you. It is not surprising that a modern person increasingly often asks the question: how to calm down and start living?

Causes of internal anxiety

Our head, as usual, is the sourceall our problems. Of course, you can analyze the complexities of the surrounding reality for a long time and blame everything on nervous overload. However, this will not make things any easier for you, since the world will not change if you simply wave your hand at it. It is much better and more effective to understand what prevents you from living peacefully. Many philosophers have assumed that the main purpose of man is to live a long and happy life. However, only a few succeed in this. What is the reason? Why do some people succeed in everything, while others cannot distract themselves from the mournful buzzing of a fly flying around the room?

The search for the meaning of life

Man is the only creature thatponders why he came to this planet. With animals, everything is very simple: they are born, reproduce and die, increasing their own population. Man has made a huge leap in evolutionary development, having built his own world on Earth. His psyche has also become more complex, and one of the consequences is that man cannot live without the meaning of life. Have you noticed how the eyes of those who know why they live light up? For example, a young mother: she spends all day fussing over her son, does not get enough sleep, does not eat enough and at the same time feels absolutely happy. Or a doctor who helps people, is absolutely calm, receiving a salary that is far from astronomical. Even in the most difficult circumstances, a person is able to maintain this inner light if he knows that this world needs him. However, losing this feeling, he instantly becomes dejected and unhappy.

Neurotic character

There are people for whom happiness is a matter of principleunattainable due to the peculiarities of their personality. They have so-called neurotic needs, which are insatiable. Simply put, the needs of such people for love, care, respect, attention cannot be satisfied - a person will want more and more every day. Naturally, this is a reason for his concern, because he constantly feels discomfort. What is a need? It is a state of dissatisfaction, some tension and a desire to return to the previous feeling of mental balance. A person with neurotic needs constantly experiences this anxiety, since he is not able to feel comfortable for a second. And thoughts about his own inferiority do not give rest.

Unwillingness to take responsibility

When you live according to other people'sideas, opinions and instructions, a feeling of anxiety can become your constant companion. This is not surprising, because the lack of control over your own life is a cause for anxiety: you cannot even try to predict what awaits you around the next turn in life. The same can be said about a person who basically takes a childish position in relation to his life. Remember how dangerous the world seemed when you were little? Something similar happens to infantile people: they constantly expect “adults” to come and save them. But they never show up, which increases the tension, and the circle closes.

Blocked emotions

From childhood we are taught to restrain our feelings:“Don’t cry — you’re a boy!”, “Stop being angry — it’s indecent!” etc. — In fact, emotions — that’s life. A child grows, develops, and in response to interaction with the outside world, he or she experiences feelings, and very different ones: joy, sadness, fear, anger, interest. And if positive emotions are supported by adults, then negative ones, as a rule, do not please anyone. When such manifestations are blocked, tension begins to accumulate in our body. It breaks out in the form of psychosomatic diseases, neurotic habits and other psychological problems. All these things in themselves are a cause for anxiety, but at the core there is still psychological energy from blocked feelings that have never found their expression.

Life in the past and future

It sounds paradoxical, but, oddly enough,many people choose this style of thinking. The past holds a person back with the weight of past events, both sad and happy. Many people feel more comfortable staying in the past, because everything is known and understandable there. But at the same time, a vague anxiety arises because a person understands his omissions on the edge of his consciousness. Even more often, people worry about the future. What will I get on the exam, when will he call, how many children will we have - all these and many other questions tear our lovely heads apart daily, if not hourly. Of course, thinking about this, we experience anxiety and worry, instead of telling ourselves: “Calm down!” and living in the present.

Live happily!

The list of possible reasons for concern is impressive.And yet, how to calm down and start living for real? Don't think that everything will go away on its own. We hasten to disappoint you, but in order to start living happily, you will have to work on yourself.

Be natural.As already written above, live in the present and show emotions. Don't hold them back and accumulate them inside - this will not lead to anything good. Of course, you shouldn't yell at your boss at the top of your lungs and sell your apartment with the purpose of giving the proceeds to the poor (unless you've wanted to do this your whole life). But a certain degree of ease and recklessness should be present.

Don't think about the bad.We have been taught this way since childhood - to predict possible adverse consequences of our actions. However, those who have firmly established this habit are very often unable to feel good due to the constant feeling of anxiety that has settled in their souls. We do not encourage you to go to extremes and be an impenetrable optimist, but think about it: the life expectancy of the latter is much higher than that of pessimists.

Learn to accept criticism.Very often we worry because someone said something bad about us. But we need to separate the wheat from the chaff. There is constructive criticism, the purpose of which is to actually improve your performance or something else. And there is destructive criticism, which is used to upset or humiliate you. So, you just need to learn to abstract from the latter, and take the former into account, and then your self-esteem will stop suffering.

Channel the energy.Very often, anxiety is just a consequence of the tension that has accumulated inside you. If this energy is not put to use, it will quickly find a use for itself, and, as a rule, an unpleasant one for the carrier, that is, for you. Instead, listen to the banal recommendation to find a hobby and go in for sports - it really works!

Learn humility.Yes, all sorts of business quotations and success diaries teach us that we must not give up and must always fight to the end. But do you know that the most common diseases among businessmen are heart attacks, hypertension and duodenal ulcers? These are the very disorders that are typical for people who exist without relaxation and harmony in their souls. Therefore, if you want to live long and happily, learn to come to terms with what you cannot change.

Calm down and follow our simple rulesrecommendations - then the quality of your life will noticeably improve. And if suddenly you come across some deeper and more serious problem inside yourself, then there is always the opportunity to contact a qualified psychologist who will help you overcome it.

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