Friendship between a man and a woman is impossible?

There are a lot of jokes about men andfemale logic. Moreover, it is mainly the representatives of the stronger sex who talk about female logic, while girls often laugh at men. It is understandable. We are different. We think differently, we feel differently. Women are more sensitive, men are better at calculating their moves (although nowadays girls can give any guy a head start in prudence). And when tender feelings flare up between two opposites, people have no questions. Love is an unpredictable thing. Which cannot be said about situations when a man and a woman are connected by friendship. This is where all sorts of gossip begins. Guys try to see hints of warmer feelings in these relationships, and the female half of humanity is looking for an answer to the question of whether it is possible to be friends with a man. Not everyone believes that two opposite sexes can find a common language with each other. Someone thinks that friendship between a man and a woman is impossible, someone is more loyal in this matter and allows for the possibility of such communication. In the end, everyone remains with their own opinion, and the question remains unanswered. Let's try to figure it out anyway.

"Pros and cons"

So, can a man and a woman be friends?Here, everything is individual. What does this mean? Well, there is no single answer to this question for everyone. Of course, if you approach the problem literally, then this answer will be affirmative, because indeed, cases of such friendship are known: someone has seen them, and someone has even experienced all this themselves. Accordingly, a man and a woman can be friends in theory. But you are probably interested in something else, namely, is friendship between a man and a woman possible specifically in your case, or does the "friend" actually cherish other intentions regarding you? And here, as was already written above, everyone finds their own answer. As a rule, this answer is based on a number of arguments supporting and rejecting the existence of intersexual friendship. What could these arguments be? Arguments "for":

The ability to keep yourself in good shape StillCommunication with a person of the opposite sex is a great opportunity to get a boost of energy and positive emotions. Even if it is only about friendship, he is a man and you are a woman, and in any case, there will be some “spark” in your communication. It is like legalized flirting (which we girls love so much) without the threat of losing such a relationship. On the contrary, they can become a great source of strength and inspiration in life.
Communication with a person who has differentyour views, opinions and thinking Agree, your head and the head of your male friend are built differently. An idea that seems interesting and entertaining to you will be boring and stupid to him, and vice versa. Thus, you can give each other very valuable advice and help to look at things from a completely opposite point of view.
Going out “into the world” Friendship with a man gives youIn this regard, there is an undeniable advantage: if you are invited to an event where you need or want to go with someone, but there are no suitable guys on the horizon, you can always ask a friend to accompany you (and he will, too). This is a partnership on mutually beneficial terms - you have a good time, and, oddly enough, the likelihood of meeting someone else increases.
Common interests in the absence of romantic andsexual sympathy Friendship between a man and a woman is possible if you have fun together, have something to talk about and do, but you don’t see this man as your companion at all (and he doesn’t see you either)? Don’t worry, because you can be friends with him just like with any other person! Moreover, such friendship can be even more interesting and intense than any other.
Lack of competition Agree, friendship witha girl – it’s always a bit of a competitive struggle. What if she’s prettier? Why did that guy smile at her and not at me? These and other questions constantly torment our female heads when communicating with friends. Of course, faithful and honest relationships without envy and reproaches are also possible between two women, but in friendship with a man they are guaranteed!
Help from a friend A male friend can always help youhelp with exclusively “male” issues, such as fixing a pipe in the bathroom, hanging a shelf, and cleaning the registry on the computer. And you, in turn, will always help him “in a feminine way” – go shopping with him, choose clothes, and comment on the behavior of his new passion.

Arguments against:

Secret suffering This is the version of intersexualityfriendship, when one wants to be friends, and the other loves, but sees no other option than to continue communication. So it turns out that he secretly suffers. Agree, in such a case there can be no talk of real friendship. Therefore, if you have the slightest suspicion that a male friend has a soft spot for you, try to clarify this.
Selfish considerations Or maybe youDo you like that he has a crush on you? It happens that we deliberately keep such an “admirer” near us – as if we keep him “in reserve”, not letting him go completely. A man can do the same. This is completely unacceptable, because one is suffering, and the other, most likely, has some problems with self-esteem. In any case, such an option cannot be called friendship.
Negative reaction from your “halves” ActuallyNot everyone will agree to their partner having a friend of the opposite sex. Yes, it may look like self-doubt, but we have all heard of cases when such friendships developed into something more. So do not be surprised if your partner throws a huge scandal and demands that you, to be on the safe side, reduce communication with such a friend. Of course, this situation can also be resolved (for example, by explaining that between two people there can be not only love and sex, but ordinary friendship), but this is a completely different story.
The risk of your relationship derailing into romance In essence,It is this risk that causes mistrust of the probability of friendship between a man and a woman. It is present almost always and, unfortunately, such a breakdown can bring your entire friendship to naught.

When friendship flows into love

Now let's talk about another possibility of developing a relationship between a man and a woman - when warm friendship develops into love and even marriage. In what cases is this possible?

If you are teenagers, because youth is nottime of solid rational decisions and reason, but, conversely, a time of feelings and spontaneity. And what can be more spontaneous than a romantic relationship with a friend? Unfortunately, such relationships end as spontaneously as they began. So think twice before translating a friend into the status of a loved one.
If you want to get married.Then there is a very high probability that after some time the desire to get married will prevail, and you will begin to perceive your friend as a potential groom. On the one hand, this is not the worst idea, because you have gotten to know the man quite well during your friendship. On the other hand, you need to think about whether your friend needs marriage. After all, men are quite straightforward, and if your friend wanted some closer relationship, he would have told you about it a long time ago.
If you are in an unhappy marriage orunhappy serious relationships. In this case, it is possible that a friend will become that very compelling reason to stop all this tediousness (but in this case, you can lose him if the romantic relationship does not justify itself). The likelihood of such an outcome increases if a woman in a marriage is subjected to violence and tells her friend about it. There are few men who would not want to protect a girl from an inadequate spouse. Once he stole a woman, twice, and look, he is imbued with more tender feelings.

Variations on the theme “why does a man make friends withwoman” can be a lot. We have already written above about such as common interests and the desire to keep “in reserve”. Another reason for friendship can be the fact that one of you or even both already have “other halves”, and you want to communicate - then friendship can become a real way out of the situation. And sometimes it happens that you initially developed friendly relations that have lasted for many years. And now you look at each other the way a sister looks at a brother, and vice versa. Your roles in this friendship can be completely different: spending a great time together, support and mutual assistance, advice and the opportunity to be a kind of “vest” for each other.

How to be friends?

Of course, it is impossible to come up with a universal instruction on how to be friends with a man. However, there are several tips that can minimize the risks of negative consequences for your friendship:

Remember that you both have the right topersonal life Therefore, it is not recommended to call your best friend at three in the morning with some crazy proposals (the exception may be those cases when your entire friendship is built on this, and you do not have regular partners). If the man is not free, do not try to come between him and his girlfriend. Moreover, women often disapprove of their man's friendship with another woman. Therefore, you should not invite your friend for a glass of beer while his wife is waiting for him at home with a hot dinner. It is better to try to make friends with his other half. This way you can spend time together and not make excuses to anyone.
Watch yourself and your behavior If there isany kind of romantic inclination, any slightest hint from you can be perceived as a signal to act, especially if the man is “always ready” for sexual adventures. Try not to arouse romantic feelings in yourself or your friend, avoid words and situations that could cause such actions.
By the way, intimate relationships “out of friendship” are alsoforbidden Believe me, no one will sleep with his friend. Therefore, if a man offers you to have fun, you should think about whether he really treats you the way he claims, or whether friendly relations are just a cover for baser desires.
Track your thoughts If you want to be friends witha man, then do not allow romantic plans and dreams about him into your head. After all, as we know, our thoughts influence our behavior and tend to come true.
Don't forget to support those parts of yourself thatthat might be interesting to your male friend After all, something distinguishes you from other girls so much that he preferred friendship to sex with you? So try to preserve and increase it.
Don't demand too much from friendship It happens,that women try to get the most out of their friendship with a man. They ask a man to hammer a nail, move things, stretch ropes in the bathroom and clear clogged pipes. Of course, mutual assistance is not bad, but only if it does not cross the line. You can ask a man for help a couple of times, but do not make it a system. Your friend does not ask you to wash his socks or cook dinner, does he? Follow his example. Try to solve your problems on your own, and then your friendship with a man can last for many years.
Be honest with your friend You both walkrather thin ice, and if it is weighed down with unnecessary tricks and inventions, it will fail. Moreover, the psychology of men differs significantly from the notorious female logic, and what in your understanding is simple deceit, in the eyes of men may look like a well-thought-out lie. Therefore, try to be as sincere as possible with your friend.
Don't take bad things into your head If you are friends withman and you enjoy the relationship, then does it matter what gender your friend is? Enjoy your communication and don't try to look for problems where there aren't any.

So what can be said about this?the existence of intergender friendship? Only one thing: it all depends on the individual. Each case is individual, and what is impossible for one may be perceived as something natural by others. The same is true for friendship between a man and a woman: if you perceive men exclusively as an object of romantic affection, then it is out of the question, but if for you a man is first and foremost just a person, then you have every chance of finding a good friend in him. In the end, the main thing is that a friend remains a friend, and you can always turn a blind eye to his gender. We recommend reading: