Every person likes to hear about themselvesnice words, including your friends. In our culture, they are not as common as compliments to a loved one. But this does not mean that it should always be like this, because sometimes you really want to say something nice to a close friend. However, the question arises, where to find sources of compliments to a friend, and what should they be? You will learn all about this from our article.

Why do you need compliments in female friendship

A compliment is an expression of admiration,sympathy and approval of something in a person. As a rule, its purpose is the desire to please another person or raise their self-esteem, bring warmth and closeness to the relationship. With the help of a compliment, we can improve a person's mood, cheer him up; in general, a compliment is a weapon for all times! Unfortunately, it can be very difficult to get pleasant words from a man - it is often unclear to them why they need to constantly talk about our beauty and charm. Therefore, compliments from a girlfriend can greatly compensate for the lack of compliments from men, because they are almost as pleasant. For female friendship, pleasant words have a special meaning. Sometimes we need something from a friend: for example, you want to ask her to go with you to a boring lunch with your relatives, spending the whole day on it. And here it will be very appropriate to give your friend a compliment: “You know how to infect everyone around you with joy and optimism, and only you can save a trip to a family dinner from the abyss of despondency!” In addition, some things no one except friends notices, for example, small changes in a haircut or a new handbag. A compliment on this matter can bring a lot of pleasure to both of you.

Types of compliments

There are a great many compliments in the worldmany. They differ from each other in structure, purpose, effect - in general, in a variety of parameters. Therefore, when you want to please your friend, you have a lot to choose from. The main thing is to know her well, so as not to make a mistake with the type of compliment (for example, some people do not perceive antithetical compliments at all due to the peculiarities of their thinking and perception). So, what types of “pleasantries” are there?

• Direct compliment

These are words that directly point topositive qualities of your friends. Sometimes a message about a person’s merit is accompanied by its decoding, for example: “Masha, you have incredibly beautiful hair! Every time I see it, it seems to me that someone spilled a bottle of awesomeness on your head.” Such compliments often use superlative adjectives, positive comparisons, intensifiers (the words “such”, “such”) or words indicating time (“as always”, “today”). Often the object of direct compliments is the friend’s appearance (figure, hairstyle, facial features), positive qualities (character traits, abilities) or a positive assessment of her behavior or actions.

• A hidden or indirect compliment

His goal is in a veiled formemphasize the advantages of the interlocutor. Unfortunately, direct compliments are not always appropriate (or so it seems to us), and we want to say something nice. A hidden compliment can be a lifesaver for us. In them, as well as in direct ones, exaggerations, comparisons and other artistic devices are often used. It has the following varieties:

praise is not addressed to the girlfriend, but to what is dear to her, for example, the results of work, achievements or children ("Your children are very nice and something like angels").

the compliment is addressed to the friend indirectly and indirectly (“My mother’s friend is an amazingly strong woman. You are very similar to her.”)

praise highlights your feelings or the kind of positive impact your girlfriend has on you ("next to you I feel ten years younger").

mention in a compliment of some generally recognizedregularities, proverbs and signs (for example, when a friend complains to you about the mess in the apartment, say: "Talented people always have a creative mess").

• Compliment made with humor

Some people can be called a jokepermeates their lives. If your friend is one of them, then she will most likely appreciate a compliment made with a bit of humor or even light irony. For example: “You are very smart. Just like me!” Sometimes it is funny to scare her a little before saying nice words: “How can you do that?! It took only half an hour, and such a delicious pie turned out!”

• Compliment-opposition

In such compliments you can fullyto demonstrate your creativity and ability to think outside the box. This type of praise is based on a paradoxical combination of negative and positive: first you say something that can be perceived in a negative way, and then you suddenly turn it into a positive one. An example would be the following compliment: “I can’t say that you are a good artist - you are the most talented and most beautiful artist!” The main thing is that the positive outweighs the negative, otherwise the effect will be the opposite. Due to the contrast, these compliments are very bright and memorable.

• Compliment-response

As a rule, they are very similar to each other.- these are pleasant words that we want to say in response to what a friend has said. They come in two types: disagreement with the negative things a friend says about herself, for example: “You are not absent-minded at all, but, on the contrary, very attentive!” Another option is a kind of verbal curtsey in her address:

Do you cook well

I had someone to study

• Bezemotsionalny compliment

It doesn't happen that often - after allUsually, praises are quite expressive and emotional. This type of compliment, as a rule, rarely causes embarrassment or indignation in the interlocutor, so it can be given even to a modest or withdrawn friend. An example of such praise can be the words: “You have a nice car. Where did you buy it?” The girl can only agree with this and tell the story of how she bought the car.

Sources of inspiration for compliments

Do you know that feeling when you want to do something?a compliment to a friend, but don’t know what to talk about? Should you praise her character or limit yourself to praising her new dress? How nice it would be to have a universal guide on how to compliment a friend! Unfortunately, such a guide does not exist, because all people are different. But girls have some common traits, thanks to which you can stumble upon the content of future praise. Each of us strives to be unique and inimitable, including each of your friends. Therefore, if you want to cheer her up, you can always compliment those qualities that distinguish her from others (or which she considers distinctive). For example, if your friend is proud of her unique way of laughing, you can always emphasize this once again in a conversation: “There was simply no chance for him not to fall for your cheerful laughter.” If there is nothing that lies on the surface, try to take a closer look at your friend: what does she have that others do not? Talk about this. If you know that your friend is proud of something, you can be sure - this can be the content of your compliment. And do not worry about repetition: even if you have praised this particular thing, action or quality a hundred times, the hundred and first will not be superfluous (this is a feature of human psychology). We are capable of listening to praise about something important and significant for us endlessly, right? An interesting step would be the desire to make an unexpected compliment. This has several useful and pleasant consequences. Firstly, it increases your friend's self-esteem. She did not even think that she had such a positive trait, and you noticed it - now she will have something to be proud of in addition to everything else. Accordingly, she will be grateful to you. Secondly, you can expect a lot of pleasant feelings from your friend. What do you think is more pleasant for a birthday: a surprise or the one you chose for yourself? Probably a surprise. The same goes for compliments - if your friend is used to everyone praising her intelligence, and you point out her appearance, it will be doubly pleasant for her. You can also try to praise something that your friend generally considers a disadvantage. This type of compliment requires a special art, so you should treat it with caution. For example, if your friend considers herself too thin, you can turn this into an advantage by saying: “I would really like to be as slim and attractive as you.”

How to properly compliment a girlfriend

It happens that the words seem to be chosen correctlyare correct, and the moment is well chosen, but the compliment does not bring joy and satisfaction to either you or your friend. This can mean two things: either your friend does not like compliments at all, or you say something wrong. In the first case, nothing depends on you (but this option is quite rare in life), but in the second case, there is always an opportunity to improve your manner of giving compliments. What is the secret of a good compliment? Firstly, it should be said sincerely. It should not contain even a hint of ambiguity or mockery of your friend - it should be simple and clear. Secondly, you cannot greatly exaggerate reality. A small enhancement of your friend's merits will not be superfluous, but if you tell your plump friend: “You are incredibly slim,” not only will she not be happy, but she will most likely be offended. Thirdly, do not forget about the correct manner of delivering a compliment:

• Do not forget that compliments should correspond to the person, place, time and situation in which they are pronounced;
• The compliment should be spoken kindly and confidently. In conversation, a sign of openness and sympathy is a smile, so you can safely take advantage of it;
• Avoid stamps in your speech: most of it causes either boredom or irritation;
• Pay attention to whom you say compliments. Do not overdo it with solemnity, but sometimes a compliment made in passing can offend;
• In the manner of saying compliments, excessive emotionality, theatricality and enthusiasm are not welcome. This makes the praise insincere and irritating;
• Do not allow a touch of irony and sarcasm in yourcompliments. If you want to offend a girlfriend, this, of course, will be the best means, but if you want to make her something pleasant, then irony and sarcasm will be superfluous;
• The best indicator of truthfulness iscorrespondence of facial expressions and gestures to what you say. Agree, it will be strange and unpleasant if you confess your love to your friend, and your eyebrows are furrowed.

The compliment should be short enough,otherwise, it is not a compliment, but a whole monologue on the topic “what a wonderful friend I have”. This is, of course, pleasant, but difficult to perceive: your friend may be tired and not understand what is so important you wanted to tell her. Try to choose words that correspond to the level of your friend’s outlook: for example, you can praise the level of development of verbal-logical thinking of a girl with a higher education, and it is better to say nice words about the beauty of a girl who has just finished college. In conclusion, I would like to once again note the undeniable benefits and advantages of compliments. Thanks to them, relationships are established and restored, love arises and destinies are built. “A kind word is pleasant even to a cat,” says a well-known proverb. Of course, we are not cats, but sometimes one nice remark is enough to lift our mood for the whole day. And it is so simple! So why not use compliments in communication with friends regularly? After all, who, if not us, should please, support and protect each other! We recommend reading:

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