It is difficult for a woman to cope alone after giving birthtwo children, and she tries to send the older child to his grandmother. As a result, the child suffers from jealousy, because now his mother is not only his! When a second child appears in the family, grandmothers begin to lament that the older child's childhood is over. If the difference between children is 2 or 3 years, then the child does not yet understand the meaning of the words spoken. But if between children, as most often happens, the difference is 6 years, then you can imagine what is going on in the soul of the older one. And now it depends only on the parents how the relationship between the older and younger children will develop in the future.

How is jealousy manifested?

When a woman is expecting her second child, she spends most of her pregnancy with her firstborn. She pays attention to him, buys him radio-controlled, soft or.Mom has enough time to go to the playground and read a fairy tale. When it comes to childbirth, it becomes more difficult for the woman and grandmothers come to the rescue. Now the eldest spends more time with his grandmother, and after the birth, he even lives with her for some time. Is this right? From the point of view of the child's peace of mind and relieving the burden on the mother - undoubtedly, it is right. But from the point of view of the child who misses his mother, his room, his bed, toys, this state of affairs is not entirely correct. After all, for the harmonious development of the child, daily attention from the parents is important. He cannot, and does not want to wean himself off the fact that with the appearance of a little brother or sister, he has to share his mother, that she no longer belongs to him completely. And then the older child can easily hit the baby, hide the bottle, constantly be capricious, making the life of the tired mother even more difficult. And grandma will behave calmly, making it clear that everything would have been fine if that little man hadn’t appeared.

Way out

At first, when the baby was just brought frommaternity hospital, the eldest daughter or son must try to explain that they will have to stay with their grandmother for a while, but that the parents will definitely see them every day. It is even better if the grandmother lives with the family for two weeks and helps the mother cope with the newborn and the older child. She will cook food, take the older child to kindergarten or school, meet him. After all, the father probably works and comes home only in the evening and therefore does not have time to do all this himself. Even if the child has to be sent to the grandmothers for a while, he needs to explain the reason for his long stay at a distance, gradually increasing the time spent together. And at the first opportunity, when the woman feels more free, the child should be returned home. So that the older one does not experience feelings of jealousy, the woman needs to show tact and restraint, gradually accustoming the older child to the baby. Ask to bring a pacifier, bring a bottle from the kitchen, unfold a diaper. Yes, there are many other small chores that can be entrusted to the older child. Let him feel that his mother can't cope without him, and that his younger brother or sister is bored if he is not around. And then the moment will come when there will be no trace of childhood jealousy, and he will even allow his younger brother or sister to touch their beloved with their finger.. We recommend reading:

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