What woman wouldn't want everything to be in herlife was going as well as possible? We are sure that there are no such people! But the trouble is that not every one of us knows how to become happy and successful. We are not going to tell you now about the need to be positive, and we are not going to urge you to repeat affirmations for happiness and success. This, of course, is also very important, but we are not talking about this now. We want to talk to those of you who have already tried similar methods, but who have not managed to find true happiness.
What is happiness?
The problem with most people giving advice ishappiness, is that they use a philosophical approach to this issue, while in fact happiness is something much simpler than it may seem to us. The state of happiness is the state when we are free from unwanted emotions, which are a reaction to our unmet needs. What is the best way to understand what success and happiness are? If we wanted to know how to make money, we would ask a rich person about it, because he has already earned it and continues to earn it. If we follow this logic, it makes sense to ask happy people about happiness. Try to watch children playing in the yard. You will find that they are all joyful and happy; we could learn from them how to enjoy life. Why are they so happy? Here are just some of the reasons why children are truly and unconditionally happy (at least when they play):
- They live, rejoicing today. It is impossible to find any children who would be worried because, for example, that at some of the next week's days he will have many lessons. It is difficult to find a child who would be worried today because a month ago he was not bought a coveted toy. So, in most cases we never feel happy, because we live in the past or in the future, but we almost never live at the moment.
- They love what they do. The child will never do what he is not interested in. A girl, going to play dolls, never does it unwillingly, being afraid in advance that she will be bored. And now tell me: most of us are satisfied with what we do every day? Do we like our studies? We are satisfied with our work? Do we have false beliefs that make us believe that we are in a certain reality that can not be changed? If you want to be happy, then you must do what you love, at least for most of the day.
- They have a passion for what they do. Have you tried to talk to a small child when he is addicted to the game? In most cases, he may not even notice you, because he is headlong into his occupation. Again, compare how much more boring tasks you do, believing that it always happens in our lives? If you want to be truly happy, you must do everything with a great desire and passion. And for this, again, you need to do what you like.
- They believe that anything is possible. Agree, it is impossible to find a child who would feel bad because he is afraid of something to dream, because he does not believe that dreams can come true. Kids are sure that all desires will certainly come true! Compare this with your way of thinking and with your false idea of the future, and you will understand why you are so unhappy now, and maybe even depression is raging all the time. But such a spleen is nothing more than a loss of hope for what you really want.
Three dimensions of happiness
At any given time, you will be in the habit ofworry about three things: the past, the present and the future. If something bad happened to you yesterday, you will be nervous today thinking about yesterday. You will feel even worse when you think about the consequences of yesterday's incident in the future. Isn't that how it always is with us? At any given time, our mood is determined by our past, the feelings that we have today and our expectations about our future. People who are always worried about something or who are afraid of the future rarely experience happiness, because two of the three components are calm today and an optimistic outlook on the future. If you had to, for example, sharply criticize someone you know one day, you will not be able to feel happy the next day because you will be worried about the impact of your critical comment. In this case, happiness is absent due to fears about the past, which is the third dimension of true happiness. This conclusion can be drawn from our observations of children.
How to become happy?
Everyone wants to be happy, but mostpeople fail to do this. Even when we manage to find happiness for a short time, very soon we feel empty again, as if our joy has evaporated for no reason. The main reason why we cannot be happy often and for a long time is the lack of understanding of emotions in general and our own experiences in particular. If we conclude from everything we have said so far, then we can give some advice that will help you feel happy more often:
- Try to solve the accumulated problems. Unresolved problems always cause mood swings that occur as soon as you encounter any reminder of them. The first step to happiness is solving your problems.
- Get rid of what ruined your life. How many people suffer every day because they hate their work, how many couples feel unhappy because they are not satisfied and burdened by their relationship! If you want to be happy, then change everything that prevents it, destroying your life!
- Stop worrying! No, of course, you can not just press the button and turn off your anxiety. But you have to understand: emotions are nothing more than messages sent to us by our subconscious to force us to take some action. Emotions associated with anxiety, we need to get a reminder of the existing problems. The only solution to nullify anxiety is to calm your subconscious mind by working out a plan for eliminating problems and starting to implement it.
- Remember that physical and psychologicalthe state is closely related. If you do not get enough sleep, you will feel irritated all day, if you are tired, then you can hardly feel joy and so on. It can be concluded that a healthy lifestyle is one of the most important components of true happiness.
- Avoid "negative" people. Emotions are contagious and very quickly transmitted between people. Having spent time with a pessimistic person, you too will lose a joyful mood. Therefore, whenever possible, simply avoid such situations.
- As it becomes clear from our advice, happiness is notcomes from nowhere, if you do not take measures to feel happy. Unfortunately, many people want to get the methods to "become happy right now," and they want at the same time that happiness is achieved by easy ways. They are too lazy to do something for themselves. But if happiness is so important to you, then why do not you make some effort to acquire it?
Get out of your prison and you will be truly happy!
- Who told you that your favorite hobby can not become your work?
- Who told you that negative experience in the past determines what will be your future?
- Who told you that you can not be happy?
If you want to be truly happy, thenyou must get rid of your false beliefs; this will allow your mind to become open to new possibilities. And if you suddenly forget how to do this, then go to the nearest park and watch children playing: you will learn a lot about what happiness is! We recommend reading:
