mistakes parents of children and pocket money Do you remember at what age did yourfirst pocket money? Most likely, like most children - in 9 - 10 years. However, time does not stand still, and modern children grow up much earlier than their moms and dads in their time. The issue of pocket money for today is the most discussed among both parents and among child psychologists and educators. The hot debate about whether children need money, and at what age they need to start giving, do not subside almost never. Of course, the financial education of the child is an extremely important stage in the development of the child and the emergence of his personality. After all, psychologists have long noticed an interesting feature - a child who actively participates in the financial life of the family and in the adult life effectively disposes of money and, importantly, knows how to earn it. This is exactly what will be discussed in this article. The topic of the article is parents' mistakes: children and pocket money. Surely even experienced parents will be able to find something new and interesting in it.

Different sides of the same coin

So, the first question that excites all parents withoutExceptions - at what age is the child worth introducing to the money? One side of educators and child psychologists advises us to begin to engage in the process of financial education of the child immediately after the child first noticed and showed interest in money - it does not matter at all, to paper or to coins. As a rule, the first interest in money for a child appears at about four or five years of age. Do not dismiss the child - explain to him why you need money, and where they come from in your purse. If your baby asks for money to buy a candy, try not to deny him, unless, of course, this is not the last money in the house - because the situation is very different. However, it goes without saying that money must be given to the child not always when he asks. And even more so in no case can not give the child money in the event that he cries and hysteria - so you let him know that by crying and tearing he can achieve anything, anything. Believe me, very soon you will regret that at one time they went on about the child, because the cry will be his main argument. Much more reasonable to calmly, but firmly tell the child that at the moment you can not buy him this or that thing. However, simply refusing is also not very good - better explain to the child why you do not buy what you want right now. Tell the child, for example, that today you have no money, but as soon as they appear, you will definitely buy the child exactly what he wants. And be sure to keep your promise - otherwise the child will stop trusting you, and it will be very, very difficult to restore this lost trust. By the way, psychologists consider a very important new step in a new stage in the development of a child when the child uses the word "buy" instead of "I want". This milestone is very important, and parents should help the child learn concepts such as "price", "value", "surrender". The easiest way to do this is by playing with the child in the "store" - it is during the game that the child receives the first financial skills. Above we have considered one point of view of psychologists. On the other hand, some child psychologists say that at such a young age the child does not need to know what money is. Moreover, there is an opinion that money completely deprives a child of childhood. Supporters of such education prefer not to give children money almost up to adolescence. However, such a tactic of behavior is very doubtful - you will agree, it will be extremely difficult for such a child to adapt in the modern world if he did not keep money in his hands until the age of 13-14. And, besides, the probability of such a difficult problem as child theft is very high. And the probability of this phenomenon is extremely high. As your child grows, his needs will also grow proportionally. And including he will need money, because he will see money from peers who can afford to buy something: a pen, a sweetness, a magazine. And it is only natural that a child whose parents do not give money will feel jealousy and a desire to have his own money. And children are quite cruel creatures, as a rule, such a child is ruthlessly teased and ridiculed. Agree, all these factors are very conducive to theft. And after all, as is known, almost all problems originate in childhood. pocket money for a child

First pocket money

So, you made a decision that pocket moneyfor your child yet to be. But how correctly to implement this idea in practice? After all, as we have already explained, pocket money is an integral part of the financial education of any child. And after all, upbringing requires a lot of time, strength and, most importantly, understanding of the child's needs and wisdom. Otherwise, you can only harm the child. The first thing that parents need to do is understand why they will give the child pocket money. Ideally, a child should receive them in order to learn how to manage money, plan a budget, compare incomes and expenses even before entering into an adult independent life. And this is a very important skill, because while the child is small, you will always be near him and will be able to influence his budget, adjust it somewhere, point out the kid to his mistakes somewhere. In addition, it is pocket money that often teaches a child that it is not always possible to get what they want, sometimes you need to wait, and perhaps give up something not so desirable. It is about the first children's savings. As a rule, it is enough for a child at least once in his life to start collecting money for anything, so that all the hysterics that he could periodically roll up to his parents have come to naught. However, in no case do not force the child to save money for essentials - clothes, any food, stationery. Remember that all this you must buy a child, regardless of whether you give him pocket money, or not. A child can collect money only for a thing that he likes, which is not a matter of prime necessity. Well, of course, pocket money gives the child a certain amount of self-confidence. First, he will not be different from his peers, who, for the most part, also have pocket money. And, secondly, he will have the feeling that he is a practical adult. And, as a rule, along with this feeling for the child comes a sense of responsibility, which is also an important positive factor. So, at what age does it make sense to give the child the first pocket money? As a rule, approximately in the first class - when the child starts to visit the school canteen. Despite the fact that almost all schools supply food to children in an organized manner and are paid by their parents, almost all the children buy something in the buffet - buns, chocolates, juice. And on the way home near various stalls, you can often see gay flocks of first-graders buying stickers and other small things. And if the question is when it is necessary to start giving the child pocket money, is it ever less clear, then with how much to give, everything is much more complicated. As mentioned above, the level of income in all families is completely different, so it is difficult to name any specific amount. So, for example, someone can painlessly allocate for his child a thousand a week, and someone and a hundred rubles is hard enough. However, children's psychologists advise those parents who are in rather cumbersome circumstances to give the child at least a very small amount, but regularly. And let the child on the money received from you not be able to buy anything worthless, it's much wiser than not giving him money at all. Otherwise, the child will soon have a strong feeling that he, unlike his peers, is deprived. Is there absolutely no problem with money in your family? It's just wonderful! But in this situation, the issue of determining the amount of money should also be approached correctly. Try to really assess the needs of the child in pocket money, ask your child's parents about the children how much they give their children for pocket expenses. Do not give much more - an excess of money for the child is also fraught with various troubles. And first of all, these children have a certain sense of superiority over other children. And having a sufficiently large amount of pocket money, a rare child will resist the temptation to show off his opportunities before peers. And, unfortunately, children's friendship is not so difficult to buy - at least, at least, the appearance of friendship. And children who have a large amount of pocket money often use this. The process of becoming a child as a person in any case is a rather complex process, which rarely runs smoothly and without excesses. And having money, the child will have an extremely strong temptation to try to solve all the problems that arise with the help of money. You do not want your child to grow up from the very childhood with a firm belief that almost everything in the world can be bought - the desired thing, the location of people around him, friendship, love, respect. It will be very difficult for such a child to adapt in adulthood, let alone get everything that he aspires for - respect, position in society, love, in the end. And even if he succeeds, he is unlikely to get moral satisfaction. That is why the pocket money of a child should not serve as a way to achieve one's own way. why give pocket money to a child

Pocket money or salary?

Another issue in which the views of parents andpsychologists diametrically opposite. And this is the question of whether to give the child pocket money for nothing, or to give them out for good behavior, excellent academic performance, or help with housework. On the one hand, it is not very correct when a bad evaluation, for example, in mathematics, should not become an excuse for refusing the child in pocket money. And the fault is unlikely to be a similar reason. But on the other hand, giving pocket money to a child who spends it on cigarettes, or who categorically refuses to attend classes, or refuses to help around the house, is also not entirely correct. Agree that everyone should always receive what they deserve. And even if this person is still a child - it is in childhood that a child should begin to learn how to answer for one's actions! So what do you need to do in this situation? It turns out that there is also a third group of parents who have found the golden mean. By the way, children's psychologists also consider it the best and right option. And the essence of this approach is very, very simple. Parents take for an axiom the fact that the child is an absolutely full member of the family. And accordingly, the child has exactly the same right to family money, like everyone else. Of course, within their age requirements. And their children know about it. However, since children are full-fledged members of the family, parents can rightly expect that the child will take part in the life of the family to the best of his ability. And, of course, to help parents - to wash the apartment floors, or go to the store for bread. Thus, the child not only feels like a full member of the family, but also acquires a sense of responsibility for the life of the family. Although some parents refuse to help children in the household, justifying their refusal by the fact that the child has a huge load in school. And with each next class this load is getting higher and higher. But many children attend various additional classes, tutors, mugs and sections. So what kind of help can we talk about in this situation? On the one hand, parents are right - the loaded child is clearly not up to household chores. But on the other hand, and in adult life, a person's load is not less, and household chores always remain an integral part. That is why, from the very childhood, it is necessary to teach the child to correctly distribute the load. Believe me, help to cover the table or bring the milk from the store under the power of absolutely every child, regardless of its load. Another important point - always discuss with your child what he plans to spend his pocket money. No matter how sensible he was, the child always remains a child. And the task of parents is not only to provide the child with money, but also to learn how to manage them. So, for example, sit together with the child, and together decide how much he can spend on all sorts of small items such as notebooks, trinkets, stickers, how many - for various sweets, and how much - will be set aside to purchase what he long wanted - for example, a new mobile phone phone or roller skates. Immediately discuss how much money and when you are ready to give your child. For a child, this stability is as important as for you - stability in getting paid. And one more question that needs to be discussed with the child is the homework that the child is ready to perform. Be sure to discuss these nuances - in this way, you can avoid all misunderstandings and offenses from the child. It is advisable to give money to the schoolchildren of lower grades in fractional parts - about once a week. But adolescents can already allocate immediately the amount that is intended for him for a month. Be sure to teach the child to control the cost of money - get a special notebook and explain in a clear example. Perhaps the first month is to help the child, if he does not mind getting this help from you. But, in no case do not do this forcibly, because a child can evaluate such a deed of yours as distrust of him. And do not be too closely and carefully monitor the costs of your child - let him stay independent. Agree, because there will be no special trouble in the event that once a child instead of a planned marker buys a pack of chewing gum or chocolate. Well, what then? Next month he will eat one chocolate less than this. After all, even adults sometimes commit rash waste, and what can we say about children whose desires for desires are much stronger by nature.

Punishment by the ruble

Often, many parents prefer to punishthe child for this or that fault is material, taking away pocket money. So, the child washed the dishes only for the species, leaving pieces of food on it? Deprived of money! But it's easy enough to explain to the child why the plates should be washed thoroughly. Got a deuce? He will necessarily correct it, regardless of whether you deprive him of his money or not. Do not also punish the child for the fact that he lost another textbook or tore the next pair of jeans - sneakers - a jacket. And if you suddenly have an irresistible temptation to punish the child with a ruble - remember your childhood! Surely you also were not really an ideal child? And finally I would like to add that, despite all the advice of psychologists and educators, it's up to you to decide what to give pocket money to a child, how many to give them, and whether to give in general. After all, no one knows your child better than you yourself.

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