Almost all the kids, after they havethe first teeth appear, they begin to search for them and bite. According to children's psychologists, biting is a completely natural way of knowing the baby around the world. However, it is not worthwhile to do such behavior by the norm of interaction of crumbs with the world around it. And all parents, without exception, need to know how to wean a child to bite. So - the problem is obvious - the child bites, what to do? How to explain to a tiny nesvysyshishu that biting an apple or carrots is not only possible, but it is necessary, but try to mate, dad and brother is not worth it? Parents of the baby are tormented by meditations - how correctly to react to the bites of the baby? To let him know that you do not like this behavior? And what if you can cause an injury to his tender child's psyche? And will he understand the ban? Continue to endure, hoping that the crumb will outgrow this one's habit and the problem will disappear by itself? But it's not so simple. The teeth of the crumb, despite their small size, are strong enough, and you hardly hold back the cry of pain after another bite of the native rodent. On the playground, a crowd of children at your appearance suspiciously quickly thinning, and on a visit your baby is invited for some reason only once ... And if the time has come to go to the kindergarten, the parents are completely falling into a state of righteous anger. How else? After all, to your little one, to such a sweet and charming child, all of them have become undeservedly picking on and slandering all manner of slander? You are used to all the complaints of educators that a child bites in a kindergarten, habitually responds that he is too small and still does not understand anything. And the special problem is that the child bites in the kindergarten, you also do not see, but on the contrary, you experience a kind of pride for your crumb who knows how to stand up for himself. However, one day a dad of one of your dear rodents bitten your child strictly, that next time he will punish him, and he advised you to seek help from a child psychologist to find out why your child bites and tweaks. And - about a miracle - your child impressively looked at this very strange papa, but the child fell behind. And here you are confronted by present turmoil. So your little one understands everything perfectly? And this means that you must direct all your efforts to disaccustom the child from the bad habit of biting. But what about the necessary child freedom that all children's psychologists talk about?
What can and can not be?
For the first time, your child has tested the strength of gum compressioneven at the time when he sucked milk. After all, milk can be extracted, only with some effort and squeezing properly the gums of the mother's nipple. In addition to the mother's breast or nipples, teethers and rubber toys became the simulators for growing teeth. If by the time when the baby has the first teeth, the mother still continues breastfeeding, she will certainly feel the natural curiosity of the crumbs, which he satisfies, biting his mother's breast. A woman should in no case be silently tolerated, and even more so encourage this behavior of the baby. Otherwise, you risk getting a biting child. Be sure immediately after your baby first tries to bite you, let him know that you do not like it. If the child tries to bite again, take his chest from him - he must clearly understand that biting, he loses not only milk, but mother's breast. By the way, to take away a breast is the best means of how to annul a year-old child from biting. As a rule, even the smallest crumbs very quickly begin to understand that mom should not be bitten. The reasons why little children bite a little others and their child quickly outgrows. However, very often a little grown up baby starts biting again, often without any apparent reason: just comes to someone and suddenly bites. And then the correct reaction of the surrounding baby's close people is also important. However, before talking about how to respond correctly, I would like to focus the attention of parents on this reason biting the child, like boredom. In most cases, boredom is the answer to the question of the parent about why children bite. In a peculiar way, the kid tries to attract the withdrawal of adults, most often the mother. It is extremely important for a child to be in the center of attention of mother and father as often as possible. And at the same time for the baby it does not matter at all what caused this splash of attention - a tide of tenderness or anger caused by a bite. That is why children's psychologists and teachers tirelessly repeat the need to give the child as much attention. Constantly communicate with the child, often praise him, hug and kiss. Very many parents are afraid of such behavior to spoil the child. However, do not confuse love with permissiveness - it is simply impossible to pamper love.
- I do not want to communicate with you!
However, when trying to bite the child tryas soon as possible to limit your communication with him. If the child is fighting and biting, tell him in a stern voice that you do not like this behavior. By the way, psychologists advise you to squat down while talking with the child, dropping, thus, on the level of the child. Everything you say will be understood and accepted much better. After you make the baby suggestion, leave the room - the child will very quickly understand the causal relationship between the bite and the disappearance of the mother. As a rule, such a measure very effectively helps to wean a child to bite.
- Oh, it hurts!
If your baby bites, try the followingtactics of behavior. Do not suffer pain, as you usually do. During a bite, shout out loud: "Ay! It hurts me "or something like that. Such a measure is sometimes very, very effective - once it can be enough for the kid to forget his habit of biting forever. However, alas, this method is good only for sensitive children who are able to empathize with surrounding people. Such babies can cry, seeing how another crumb broke their knees, or at the sight of a homeless dog or cat. However, less susceptible natures believe that it is bad only when they hurt them. But they have every right to hurt others.
- Fix negative associations with a bite.
Many parents repeatedly hear the advice to bitechild in return. Like, thus, a child with bites will have the most negative associations. However, in fact, this is a delusion. Such a tactic of behavior of adults often leads to the opposite result. Having bitten the child, we give him confirmation of the correctness of his behavior: "I will bite, because my dad also bites." A much more sensible act would be not to show reciprocal aggression, but, on the contrary, express sympathy for the victim. Hug, kiss that family member who was attacked by your little biting aggressor. Such a tactic of behavior will cause the child to think about the permissibility of such behavior.
If the child repents
In the event that a child bites someonea burst of emotion, and not purposefully, immediately remembered and sincerely repents of his actions, you should not particularly criticize him. By the way, such a situation can be used to develop feelings of empathy for those around him. Let the little rodent blow at the bitten place, paste a sticking plaster, give an offended toy. Perhaps some parents will find such troubles unnecessary because of such seemingly trifling, believing that the usual "forgive" will be quite enough. However, in this case, when the baby grows up, do not be surprised that you will not get any attention and help from it, except for the duty "forgive" thrown over your shoulder. Not children are born insensible, but we are such they grow up.
I'm tired!
The child's nervous system is extremely sensitive andchildren are very prone to overexcitation. And in such a situation, the kid is practically unable to control his emotions. If a child bites one or the other from one of the children during an active game, or in a kindergarten, perhaps he is simply very tired. However, this assumption is valid only in cases where a bite for a child is something out of the ordinary, but by no means the norm of behavior. In such a situation, in no case do not scold your child - he is already very much frightened by such a flash of indomitable rage with which an adult - that people manage to manage is not always. Psychoemotional stress is another reason why a small child bites. Adults in such cases should as soon as possible to take the child to a quiet and peaceful place. However, in no case do it in such a way that the child can perceive withdrawal from the place of play as a punishment. Motivate this your action is the need to rest a little and nothing more. Stay with the crumb until he does not calm down completely - talk to him, read the book to him, but do not leave him alone at all, as this can aggravate the psychological state of the crumbs. In the event that the crumb, at least once allowed himself to bite someone, you need to carefully monitor him, controlling the mood and preventing such outbursts of anger in a timely manner. If you notice that during the game your child became nervous, began to show the first signs of discontent, divert the attention of the baby, switching it to something else. Anger is an absolutely natural emotion that has the same right to exist, as offense, joy and others. Admit to yourself - even you, adults and people who control your emotions, often feel anger. But you, unlike the baby, know perfectly well how it can be splashed out so as not to harm the people around you. So why not teach your baby that? Show the crumb how you can knock your hands over the cushion cushion, tear unnecessary pieces of paper into small pieces, after all, loudly scream. Of course, screaming is not the best way out of the situation, but it is with the help of screaming that it is easiest for a small child to get rid of the emotions that overfill him, by the way, both positive and negative. But you surely agree that shouting at times is preferable to painful bites. Complete suppression of negative emotions in crumbs is inadmissible in any case, because it can lead to the development of various neurotic reactions. As a result, such an alleged control over anger can result in prolonged treatment in a child psychologist and neurologist. Agree that this is too high a price for the silence in the house.
Blackmail and threats
Even the smallest kids areremarkable psychologists and very often purposefully drive adults into the framework that is currently needed by them. This also applies to biting. Children understand very well that biting is ugly and embarrassing. But even better, they understand that it would be awkward for mother to first of all if the baby starts biting with strangers, for example, in a store. And the little guy begins to masterfully master this knowledge, resorting to blackmail "buy me, or I'll bite you." Most often, the mother will give the child the desired, only to avoid an unpleasant scene with strangers. And while they reach the house, my mother will stop being angry and will not punish her child. And the child, knowing this well, will enjoy this situation. The best solution to this problem is to eliminate the provoking environment. Became capricious? Take the child out of the store, despite his screaming and crying. Do not give in to the persuasion and hysterics of the baby and do not go back to the store. One or two of these lessons - and your child will forever give up the habit of trying to blackmail parents. You can bite the bite of a child. After all, when a one-year-old child bites, it can still be understood and accepted, but when a 3 to 4 year old kid tries to bite, measures must be taken in emergency mode. However, you should not hope that you will do it instantly, especially if for a long time you in no way gave the baby to understand that such behavior is unacceptable. The main thing to your assistants in this difficult task should be consistency. Once banned from biting, you can never bite bites at the hands of a kid, even if you really do not have time to make comments to him at the moment. Otherwise, the child will try the framework permissible over and over again, hoping that parents will not be punished for his actions before his actions. Of course, your child will soon grow up. And certainly in school he will not solve problems by biting. But, having learned not to bite the baby at an early age, you will save your child from the fact that all the children will begin to shun him. But after all, self-esteem of a person begins to be laid down in a deep childhood. So let your baby grow smart, happy and self-confident baby. We advise you to read:
