Many women, fearing pain during childbirth,afraid of getting pregnant or refuse to have children at all. This fear, to an even greater extent than any other, can paralyze a delicate girl's soul. At the same time, it is very difficult to calm yourself with the thought that, well, everyone gives birth, and I will give birth too. That is why the question of how to overcome the fear of childbirth is one of the most important and discussed in any childbirth preparation courses. We did not ignore it either.

Physiological meaning of childbirth

Before answering the question of howto overcome the fear of childbirth, it is necessary to understand and realize the physiological meaning and principles of childbirth. The birth of a child is a normal process that has a certain periodization. Each of these periods brings a woman closer to meeting her baby - this must be remembered in the most difficult moments. The first stage is the opening of the cervix. It begins with its smoothing - this is a structural change necessary for the correct course of labor. The onset of labor is evidenced by regular contractions (regular interval, gradually increasing intensity of contractions), which contribute to the opening of the cervix and the advancement of the presenting part of the head. The main motto for women during this period is to save energy. If the contractions are still weak, it is best to sleep and gain energy. A feeling of internal warmth is very important during contractions - it can be created with the help of hot tea, wine (yes, a woman in labor can have a glass or two!) or something tasty. You can also lie in a hot bath if you can't sleep. Gradually, the smoothing of the cervix passes into the period of active contractions, and the woman, as a rule, evaluates this transition as subjectively more difficult and unpleasant. The pain intensifies, because the contractions become more frequent and intense. This is due to the fact that your cervix is ​​stretching more and more (just like your muscles during stretching exercises - it hurts, but not critically and is quite bearable). In order to alleviate your condition, you can:

• Relax.During the actual contraction, a woman may have an involuntary desire to tense up - this is due to the experience of pain. But this intensifies it, and relaxation, on the contrary, reduces it. Therefore, try to internally "let go" of your stomach.
• It's right to breathe. This helps to relax and receive oxygen in your body (and it is now very necessary for you and the baby). At the beginning and end of the bout, take a deep breath, and at the peak intensity try to breathe twice as slow as usual.
• Take the correct posture.The most physiological positions are considered to be vertical (standing with support on your husband or a chair, squatting, etc.), but sometimes it may not suit you. Therefore, to ease your condition, move around and try to find the right position. It happens that a woman makes incredibly bizarre movements during contractions.
• Move more.Firstly, it will distract you from the contractions (and they can last quite a long time - so much so that you may even get bored), and secondly, it really does make the contractions easier to bear: you are in an upright position, and this facilitates the process of opening the cervix.

In general, the period of contractions can be carried out comfortablysurvive at home: no one will bother you, examine you unnecessarily or stimulate you. You can do some things or just relax, which will certainly help you calm down and relax. You can also spend this time with your family and friends, which is also an important factor in peace and comfort. It is better not to think about time: if you count the minutes and expect that everything will end soon, reality may deceive your expectations a little, which will be additional stress. Therefore, tune in to a philosophical mood and do not look at the clock. But by the end of active contractions, it is better to come to the maternity hospital. Next comes the period of transition to the birth canal. The baby's head descends, and he begins to prepare for birth. The task of this period is to open the cervix from seven to eight centimeters (which active contractions led to) to the diameter of the baby's head. The sensations are very painful - the woman feels as if she is being burst from the inside, combined with very strong, as if premenstrual pain. But this pain means that almost the entire path has been covered, a little work remains - and here it is, meeting your child! The next period is the period of expulsion of the fetus. Many women are afraid of this, since in the movies at such moments a woman looks the worst. But do not forget that this is the shortest period of time - from an hour to two for first-time mothers and from five minutes to an hour for second and subsequent births, and it is usually accompanied by an altered state of consciousness. During pushing, childbirth requires from you not only patience, but also a huge amount of effort. This is why childbirth is usually called hard physical work. A woman needs to push, and as hard and correctly as possible - then the efficiency increases, and the time of pushing is reduced. And finally the baby's head appears, and this is - the moment of greatest happiness in the life of any woman!

Sources of fear

A woman is never afraid of childbirth as such:the question of how to overcome the fear of childbirth torments her only when the fear has some deeper or even hidden reason. And when the fear has even slightly arisen in her consciousness, a woman (especially pregnant and wound up by hormones) tends to inflate and exaggerate it to enormous proportions. As a result, her fear later appears before her as a huge monster, which is not so easy to cope with. Therefore, it is better to intercept it at the very stage of its inception. So, we offer you a list of the most common reasons for the fear of childbirth.

Pain Surely you saw on the Internet the words that,that during childbirth a woman feels pain up to 57 del (a measure of pain), which is similar to a simultaneous fracture of twenty bones. It is possible that this is so, but in reality, everything is not so bad. The woman's organism is maximally adapted to this pain, because women have given birth to children for thousands of years, when there were no anesthetics in sight. You can determine in advance how much pain you will experience, and try to get rid of it as much as possible: there are very effective methods of natural anesthesia, well, and epidural anesthesia in extreme cases. Every woman has her own threshold of sensitivity. If it's low, you will not feel any pain, and maybe even enjoy it. If the sensitivity is high, it is very important to take the right pose during birth, to breathe properly, and, most importantly, do not be afraid!

The Unknown Item number two on the list of the mostcommon female fears. Humans are designed in such a way that they feel anxious in a situation of uncertainty. But the first birth is the unknown: you don’t know what will happen, how it will happen, and what you will feel. Accordingly, the best weapon to fight this fear is knowledge. Try to learn as much as possible about what lies ahead of you - and perhaps your fear will go away on its own.

Negative experience Sometimes fear of second (or(subsequent) births are caused by the presence of negative experiences in the past related to childbirth. This could be a memory of an evil and incompetent doctor, complications in a previous birth, problems with the child or something else - it does not matter. It is important to properly prepare for new ones, and for this it is necessary to analyze the difficulties that befell you in previous births: what or who were they associated with? What is the likelihood of their recurrence this time? What can you do to prevent troubles? In case the fear still paralyzes you, it would not be superfluous to seek help from a psychologist who will help you separate yourself from the psychotraumatic situation.

Lack of readiness for motherhood Sometimes affectand psychological problems. If the future mother in principle is not ready to have a child and subconsciously fears this, the body will try in every possible way to slow down the process of childbirth, making it painful and long. Therefore, your main assistants are faith in the future and positive emotions in anticipation of the birth of the baby. And then everything will turn out!

Fear of looking ugly Oh, this is a womanthe desire to always remain attractive! Unfortunately, it is difficult to implement it in the process of childbirth. We sweat, lose blood, and sometimes there are embarrassments like emptying the bladder or colon. In order to understand how to overcome the fear of childbirth in this case, you need to get to the bottom of his nature: why are you afraid of looking ugly? This may be due to a pathologically low self-esteem, which does not allow you to relax for a second. Or do you worry about your appearance due to the fact that with you in childbirth will be a husband, and you do not want to disappoint him. In any case, find out the true nature of this fear and work with it already.

Fear of dying This fear has genetic roots:earlier, when the level of development of medicine was much lower, the mortality rate of women during childbirth, in turn, was much higher. In memory of those times, some girls experience horror when they think about childbirth (especially if there were similar cases in their family). If you want to overcome this fear, then you should read statistics about what percentage of mortality is now (by the way, it is very small - doctors have now learned to overcome very serious difficulties), because of which an accident can occur - in general, arm yourself with knowledge, which, as we know, is light.

We are tuning to a positive wave

So, we have sorted out the reasons for fear.Well, what to do with it yourself? How to overcome the fear of childbirth? Psychologists offer women a lot of options that help calm it down and set it in a positive mood. First, listen to yourself, and not to anyone else - if you feel calmer about going to give birth without knowing anything about this process, then go and give birth, and do not listen to your friends who attend courses for expectant mothers. If you still feel calmer when you know what awaits you, then try to find as much information about childbirth as possible: sign up for lectures for expectant mothers, talk to those who have already given birth, read relevant literature. The more different points of view you absorb - the better. But try to protect yourself from negative information. For example, if you are impressionable, then it is better not to watch videos of childbirth - for an unprepared psyche, this can be too much stress. Learn to relax and distract yourself from everything unpleasant. Auto-training can help you overcome your fear: repeat various life-affirming statements several times a day - those that you like the most. Visualization techniques will not be superfluous either. Close your eyes, turn on pleasant music and imagine in detail your labor: how the contractions begin, each of which brings you closer to meeting the baby, how he prepares to come out, how you push and help him and how he is born. Periodically immerse yourself in this memory, and labor will become something close and calm for you. Well, and the most important thing that can help you overcome the fear of childbirth is the following statement: childbirth is hard work, but you work, helping another person to be born - your child. In fact, you contribute to the greatest miracle on Earth - the process of birth. When you feel pain, think about how hard and scary it is for him, how difficult and multifaceted his work is. Give your child positive emotions - after all, this is his first encounter with the real world. This, like many other things in life, is important to live through from beginning to end, to live through with your baby. We guarantee that as soon as you stop thinking only about yourself and imagine your baby, the fear will decrease, and maybe even disappear completely. We recommend reading:

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