They say that love knows no age, thatYou can meet a truly close and dear person at 30 and at 50 years old. We see happy celebrity couples on TV, where husbands are twice or even three times older than their young companions. They all never tire of repeating that their marriages are the happiest and most reliable. But that's on the screen, and in real life, any girl who decides to tie her life to a man 20 years older than herself is really taking a risk. Will her prince on a white horse turn out to be an ordinary boring old man after 10-15 years of living together, will the age difference of 20 years not seem to her an insurmountable obstacle to a happy family life? Agree that when a seventeen-year-old girl falls in love with a man 20 years older, we all shake our heads and hope that this "wind in the head" will soon pass, that the girl will switch her attention to another object, more suitable for her age. But when a fully grown, mature woman decides to marry a man twice her age, we secretly “keep our fingers crossed” for her, hoping that she will not make a fatal mistake. 20 years of difference are practically different generations, where each of the spouses has completely different interests and temperaments. Despite this, unequal marriages with a large age difference are far from uncommon, moreover, they are becoming quite popular.

Why do girls decide on an unequal marriage

While you are 25 years old and he is 45, then everything seems to be fine,normal: he is still young, full of strength and desires. Girlfriends look with curiosity and bewilderment at the cute guy tenderly holding your hand, and you simply glow with love and happiness. But what will happen when you turn 40 and he turns 60? It is unlikely that any woman who has decided to connect her life with a man much older than her does not think about this. But why, despite all the visible difficulties, do they jump into this pool headlong, what is the reason?

It's sad, but more often than not women andgirls agree to a marriage with a man of about twenty years older for quite mercantile reasons. Men at a respectable age have already achieved certain heights in their careers and have received the status of a well-off, respected human society. In financial terms, they can afford much more than young people, and this factor is decisive for many ladies. Hundreds of young girls are in a state of active search for a rich "Papic", who once and for all will solve their financial problems. Most often such a union resembles a business contract, where the roles of each of the spouses are prescribed in advance: it gives him his youth and body in return for material prosperity.

Very often young girls pay attention tomen are twice as old as themselves because they lacked paternal love as a child. Every little girl needs a smart, kind dad who will take care of her, give advice in difficult situations, give gifts. If all this in the life of the girl was not, then she unwittingly strive to warm her soul next to those who are almost in her fathers good. With him, she will finally feel what she needed so much in her childhood: reliability, protection, affection. Is it possible to call these feelings true love, will she not understand with time that she does not need a "father" for husbands, but a normal, loving man?

It has long been known that girls are growing upmuch faster than boys. And so, reaching sexual maturity, the young lady does not look at her peers who have computer toys and cars on their mind-they should be served by an adult who "saw the life" of a boyfriend. It is much more interesting to communicate with him, he is able to consider that behind the appearance of a round honors student lies a trembling female soul. Fortunately, such hobbies usually pass quickly, and adult men can soon get bored with such young maidens.

There is a category of men who in family lifeprefer to play the role of mentor, and there are women who like to act as pupils. If these two meet and decide to create an alliance, then he can have every chance of success, despite the age difference. These girls, as a rule, are not interested in communicating with peers in principle, because they need a wise man with a rich life experience in life.

Of course, it also happens that two people,who have a difference of 20 years, just feel real feelings for each other. They love, in spite of the fact that they are separated "not by years but by life". This does not happen very often, but these people can be really happy in marriage. A brilliant example is the famous singer Celine Dion and her husband Rene Angelila. The husband is older than Celine for as long as 26 years, their relationship has lasted for a quarter of a century. When Renee fell ill with cancer, the singer immediately stopped her singing career and nursed her husband until full recovery. Does not this mean that unequal marriages can be happy if they are built on love and mutual understanding?

Disadvantages of unequal marriage

Why does society have such a negative attitude towardsmarriages where the age difference between a man and a woman is very large? A couple of hundred years ago, no one would be surprised by the union of a rich elderly nobleman with a young beauty. Moreover, such a state of affairs was considered absolutely normal, and mercantile interests on the part of the bride were not considered something shameful. In our time, the attitude towards such unions is completely different. It is no secret that with age, men are drawn to young girls, they are attracted by their freshness, naivety and inexperience. But what is it like for women themselves who have entered into such a union, what should they expect from such a marriage?

• The most serious problem in families where a manmuch older than his wife - is a difference in interests. With a certain age, the character and habits of a person change, and this is not surprising. Gone are the days when he danced to disco in the morning, when I wanted to go every day to find new experiences. Closer to fifty men prefer to lead a quiet lifestyle, and instead of fun and extravagance they think it's best to read an interesting book or watch a good TV show in a cozy living room. But what to do if a young woman still has blood boils, if she wants to enjoy life, meet friends, lead an active lifestyle? There and then comes the moment when two people who love each other cease to understand each other.
• Very often a man who married a girl on 20years younger than himself, agonizingly experiences his aging. He sees that his health and temperament are no longer allowed to go level with his young girlfriend, and it gnaws it from the inside. Hence - groundless jealousy, cavils, fear of losing your beloved. Not every married couple can overcome such a barrier, the constant self-interest of a partner can destroy a marriage.
• Let's face it: with age, male potency weakens, which means that it is becoming more and more difficult for a partner to satisfy a young woman. After couple of tens years of a joint life sexual relations in such family become the big rarity. If only the wife does not belong to that rare category of ladies, to whom sex is completely indifferent, then this problem can become a real disaster for family life. And the point here is not only that the spouse gradually loses her male power - men at the age often lose interest in the process and fulfill their marital duty "for a tick". Hence - either adultery from the female side, or parting with an aged husband.
• Many young ladies who married menrespectable age, complain that their husbands do not want to have children. What's so surprising? In their lives, all this was already: sleepless nights, children's crying, diapers, ryazhonki. Most men who have such experience behind them are content with children from a previous marriage, they just do not need these physical and moral problems at their age. That's why it often happens that before young women the question arises: either to abandon motherhood and continue to live with this person, or to seek another companion of life.
• Sometimes in marriages, where a man is much older than his wife,children do not appear for entirely different reasons. After 40 years, the reproductive capacity of men falls, the chance for their companions to conceive a healthy offspring is sharply reduced. Of course, there are exceptions, and quite frequent, but in most cases the situation is exactly this. If 30 years ago, the "culprit" of a sterile marriage was a woman, nowadays everything has changed: now it is men who have problems with childbearing. And, unfortunately, with age, this negative situation is only exacerbated.
• Whatever it was, but society often condemnsMarriages, where a man is as much as 20 years older than his wife. At such a pair look askance, discuss behind your back, pour taunts. A girl who chose a man twice her husband's husband is accused either of mercantilism or of stupidity. For most women, this situation is rather unpleasant, they are in constant stress, experiencing the attitude of others. And what can we say about the parents' opinion: it is not easy for them to experience the fact that the daughter's husband is the same age as the pope himself. In a word, the negative flows from all sides, and not all women are able to overcome this stressful situation.
• Unfortunately, this is the law of life: women who married a man 20 years older, look much older than their years, their husbands, on the contrary, are younger. This is not surprising, because each of the spouses adjusts to his soul mate, wishing to match her. Every man in the venerable age subconsciously experiences the fear of death, and having found a young, energetic woman as a life partner, he literally adapts to her biological clock. A young wife becomes such a donor: her husband is younger, she externally withers. The surrounding people quickly notice the changes in the appearance of the recent beauty, and their sympathy and compassionate glances do not add a good mood to the woman.

Pros of unequal marriage

If there was a marriage where the men were much oldertheir women, if there were only disadvantages, they would hardly exist at all. There are many married couples in the world who have overcome all the difficulties of life together associated with the age difference. Sometimes such unions turn out to be much stronger and more reliable than those of families where the spouses are the same age. So what are the advantages of such an unequal marriage?

• One of the significant merits of marriage, where the husband is olderwife for 20 years is that a man has a rich life experience. He is no longer as reckless as in his youth, and he is well aware of what needs to be done to save the family. Unlike young guys, he will carefully guard his family hearth from minor quarrels and scrapes, capable of destroying relationships. He knows what PMS is, knows what gifts women love and what they expect from a man in bed. In addition, such a husband - a great adviser, he is wiser and more calculating than his peers. Of course, in our time and young people are surprisingly perspicacious and intelligent, but they lack patience and flexibility. It's just those qualities that come to people with experience.
• As a rule, most men in 40 have already foundfinancial stability, they are able to provide their young companion with a decent life. There is no need to save money on an apartment and a car - by this age men usually manage to become successful and financially independent. As a result, a woman gets financial stability and can easily study, make a career or do what she likes, without fearing that her needs will ruin the family budget.
• If the husband is much older than his wife, then he is veryis proud of his young wife and is afraid of losing her. Hence - his constant tokens and attempts to keep a young wife next to him. Such people value relationships not as an example more than men of the same age. And, you see, any woman is very pleased when she is so highly valued and protected.
• It is unlikely that a man whose wife is 20 years younger than himhimself, decide to go "left", because his house is waiting for a beautiful wife - a young and sexy. And why look for adventures on the side, if at his disposal a young, resilient body full of fire and passion? Of course, there are exceptions, but such "goulos" are in any marriage, and the difference in ages is not to do with it. In an unequal marriage, where a man is much older than his wife, male infidelity is a very rare phenomenon.
• If a man at a venerable age was luckyto become a father, then you will not find the best father. Agree that the attitude towards the children of young parents and grandparents is quite different. People of the older generation are much more consciously approaching the education of children, their joy from communicating with them is simply enormous. With age comes the understanding that children are a great happiness, this is a miracle that must be loved and protected. Young daddies are not always capable of showing such feelings towards their children. But a man who became a father at a venerable age, will be an incredibly caring and loving parent.

There are many happy married couples in the modern world.couples with a big age difference. In order for such relationships to last long, it is necessary that the man and woman have similar psychotypes, common interests, love, in the end. If you are truly in love, then all the problems and difficulties of an unequal marriage can be overcome. But if you have decided to marry a man 20 years older than you, then you must understand that sooner or later age will take its toll and your husband will grow old. Someday, from a brutal forty-year-old macho, he will turn into a gray-haired old man swallowing pills and demanding a heating pad. And at this time you will still be young and good-looking, and attractive men will continue to pay attention to you. Are you ready to become for your adult husband not only a loving wife, but also a caring mother in one person? If so, then you can well count on a happy family union for many, many years. If not, then try to look for your happiness elsewhere - otherwise in a couple of decades it will be unbearably hard for you to see next to you an aged copy of the person you once loved. We recommend reading:

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