Have you heard about the midlife crisis in men?That's all. But, as it became known, women are also susceptible to this psychological disease. Moreover, the midlife crisis in women has been noticed for quite a long time. It's just that before the advent of the feminist era, it was not customary to talk about it. Not fashionable, if you like. And all because women were more dependent on men, family, public opinion. So they suffered in silence. By the way, our grandmothers had a crisis a little earlier than now. It's all due to the cotton dresses from the department store, shapeless shoes, hair burnt by chemicals and the inaccessibility of cosmetology. Put all these concepts together, and you will understand what we are talking about. Or look at the photographs of those years: the textile industry, it would seem, did everything possible and impossible to hide the femininity of the forms of Soviet women. Of course, there were exceptions. But if you compare an ordinary woman after forty at that time and our contemporary, the difference will be obvious. It's a good thing that the party helped to save crumbling marriages (and male crises existed in the Soviet Union too). Why put yourself in order if you can just complain to higher authorities? And they will certainly return the errant husband to the bosom of the family. Today, the fair sex is more independent and self-confident. But it is still not immune to disappointments and psychological problems. So, the midlife crisis usually occurs between thirty-five and five years. Note that for women this period begins five years earlier than for men, since youth, by common consent, ends earlier. If a forty-year-old man has every chance of starting a family after a divorce, then his peers have a hard time. Moreover, the crisis itself begins in the subconscious of the woman. In the understanding that she is getting old. Outwardly, a woman can remain very attractive, but television programs, glossy magazines will show her the young faces of sixteen-year-old girls who still have their whole lives ahead of them. But let's not get distracted. Let's talk about the signs of a midlife crisis in women. But we won't just describe them, we'll offer options for getting out of the current situation.

"I have aged ..."

It has been observed that the first symptoms of a midlife crisisage in women manifests itself with obvious signs of aging of the body. At the moment when the state of the soul does not correspond to the appearance. The woman still feels young, capable of desperate actions, crazy feelings, and the mirror indifferently shows early wrinkles, a plump waist and cellulite on the hips. Many bitterly say: “I don’t recognize myself in the mirror! Who is this terrible monster? Anyone, but not me.” However, day after day the reflection changes only for the worse. And you need to come to terms with this. Solution: It all depends on how much the woman has changed over the past fifteen years. And who exactly is next to her. With an attentive and responsive husband, she only needs to change her hairstyle, update her wardrobe and sign up for a swimming pool. If the other half aggravates the suffering of the wife, the woman decides on extreme measures: from a young lover to a scalpel of a plastic surgeon. An actively rejuvenating woman is not as common a phenomenon as a rejuvenating man. For some reason, society forgives men more readily than women for short hair and tight jeans. And in vain. After all, looking younger than you are is wonderful. But don’t make it the only goal, for the achievement of which all means are good. Otherwise, you can miss a number of very important moments in your life, for example, growing up children or respect for yourself at any age.

Children grew up

This type of crisis is very common among women.marriage, when the children have already grown up, and mutual understanding with the husband was irretrievably lost during the periods of diapers, undershirts, kindergartens, schools and drawing clubs. Sometimes a woman begins to take care of the children so enthusiastically that she completely forgets that her son or daughter will sooner or later start their own family, and she will be left alone with her husband. With the same one with whom she has not had a heart-to-heart talk for a long time. As a result, the children grow up, and the mother feels lonely and believes that her life has not been lived the way she would like. And even attempts to get closer to her husband show that next to her is not the same person she once married. The person has changed, and the interests that once brought the couple together are now irrelevant. Solution: Some women in this case begin to actively pursue a career. But most often - they give birth to a child. By doing this, they not only fill the spiritual emptiness, but also prolong, in their opinion, their own youth. In general, this problem is one of those that is easier to prevent than to solve. In extreme cases, visiting a family psychologist can greatly contribute to rapprochement.

Choosing a career instead of children

Women who have been busy all their livesbuilding a successful career, also suffer from a midlife crisis. They begin to understand that in the pursuit of success, they have missed the quiet moments of family happiness and the joy of motherhood. Iron ladies begin to stare at babies in strollers. The maternal instinct begins to play in them. And this is probably the mildest form of midlife crisis in women. Solution: Women either hastily find a husband to create a full-fledged family and have a child, or give birth for themselves and finally fulfill the most important function assigned to them by nature. It must be admitted that such women eventually become good mothers. They have become accustomed to great responsibility over many years of building a business, and they approach raising a child no less seriously.

Change of world view

Often, a midlife crisis is associated withre-evaluation of the life lived. Everything seems to be fine. The husband does not drink, does not smoke. The children study, work and have not turned into alcoholics and criminals. The family is well-off. The job is stable, from nine in the morning until five in the evening. On weekends - a dacha. In the summer - trips to the sea. But something is still wrong. Suddenly a little maximalist wakes up in the woman - her reflection of herself at the age of seventeen. When it seemed that the whole world is at your feet. And if you marry, then only to a prince. And to live exclusively in a castle on the seashore. And the children are solid geniuses. But in the end it turns out that the prince has a habit of walking around the house in his underwear, has a belly and never puts the toilet seat down. The luxurious castle, ironically, turned into a standard Khrushchev-era building, where the ceilings leak in the spring and fall (it is the top floor, after all), and the children ... what are children? They turned out to be ordinary children. Not Surikovs, not Einsteins, not Abramovichs. They live on a scholarship, save money for a smartphone, quarrel with their parents. Just like everyone else. Solution: All mature individuals inevitably go through this stage. It is impossible to live half of your life and not draw intermediate conclusions. Firstly, this way you can really evaluate what you have done, and secondly, understand where to move on. Well, and the maximalist will have to be calmed down. Most likely, if you really wanted to live in a palace with a prince, you would already be living there, but would you be happier?

Apathy

The most difficult manifestation of the midlife crisisage in a woman can be called the age at which she wants absolutely nothing. She is not interested in personal relationships, children, or a career. One fine day, a woman begins to think that her life has gone along with her youth, and she begins to doomedly go with the flow. There is no obvious reason for the crisis here. It is hidden somewhere in the depths of the subconscious, which causes even more discomfort. Usually, this is how the midlife crisis proceeds in secretive and taciturn women who believe that their best friend is a pillow and do not have kindred spirits. They have no one to cry on their fate to. So they suffer in silence. Solution: In such cases, it is very difficult to help a woman. Moreover, the family, as a rule, perceives the symptoms of the disease as nonsense, which further aggravates the problem. And it is not about the callousness of relatives. Remember the woman's life credo: no loved ones. Therefore, she has a cool relationship with her family. If the husband and wife are the same age, then the midlife crisis coincides with the male one, and the couple has every chance of breaking up. While the wife is looking at the ceiling with resignation, her husband begins to actively try to look younger. He buys himself a fancy motorcycle, and eventually realizes that he does not want to see a plump woman with a dull look next to him. Oddly enough, divorce allows a woman to shake herself up and continue living. However, we would advise not to solve the problem so radically and not to wait until the collapse of the family contributes to the end of the crisis in the woman. It is best to contact a psychologist or psychotherapist in time. Finally, I would like to say to all the women who recognized themselves in this article: be strong. You survived childbirth, long periods of breastfeeding, diapers and nights of lack of sleep (all mothers will understand us now, because what is considered a woman's duty is sometimes very difficult to survive). You coped with family problems and minor life troubles. So won't you overcome some kind of midlife crisis? After all, as Katya from the film "Moscow Does Not Believe in Tears" says, life only begins after forty. So let's start it with a smile! We recommend reading:

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