Seminar Alexander Knyazev in Penza How to raise a happy child

Photo: personal archive A. Knyazeva Alexander Knyazev - Psychologist Practitioner, Doctor of Pedagogical Sciences, Professor of the Department of Acmeology and Psychology of Professional Activity of the Russian State Academy of Civil Service under the President of the Russian Federation, Director of the Institute of Global Education and Development (Moscow), VIP Consultant. For Alexander S. issues of parenting. If you are thinking about raising a child, then perhaps the professional opinion will be useful for you, it will be a hint or recommendation that you can use if you want. back?Each time period dictates its own conditions. Children react to changes more subtly, sensitively, I would even say, more correctly and accurately, than adults. They still have no borrowed patterns, stereotypes of how it is right ... We, adults, are already lagging behind, to a certain extent we come from the past, although, of course, more experienced, wise. We with our need to understand that you can not sew clothes on patterns 15 years ago, you can not bring up the modern child on the patterns that were distributed ten to fifteen years ago. The society is dynamically developing and makes an extensive fan of new requirements for the younger generation. We need to learn to feel the changes, to keep up with the times, both in our own development and in the upbringing of children. Otherwise, conflict is inevitable: between us, our parents, and our children, between our children and the new conditions of adaptation or the challenges of the time for which we could not prepare them. about modernity. Now, many moms are trying to arrange not only family life, but also a career. How to raise an obedient, happy child and not lose a good job?I can answer this question not only aspsychologist, teacher, but also as a father of two children. It so happened that we, the parents, were included in a dynamic, complex professional activity that took almost all the time. It was both a ministry and a necessity. We could not devote enough time to the children, and the grandparents were not around, we were far from our parents, who could keep us safe in raising children. Sometimes we heard from the side: “Lost the children ... Children should be given more time!” Yes, we understood, but could not do anything. Communicated a little, in the evenings, on a rare weekend. But they understood one thing ... Children should show by their example how to relate to business, to people, to themselves. And the time that we had for children should be spent fun and productive to be friends with children. And yet ... Our children during our employment had to grow up early, especially the eldest son. In the future, he was already no worse than us coping with the upbringing of the younger daughter. Our children soon became our partners. We tried to support in them the desire to be partners for us in everything. Now my children are adult successful people. I'm proud of them. I support the position of specialists in the field of education, who believe that the point is not the amount of time you spend with your child, the point is how you spend this time. Do not lose yourself, do not sacrifice your professional development, personal growth in the name of the child! Better show him how you can work, how you develop, how you feel about life, about people. Help him get involved in interesting things so that he too is busy and interested in something. “From year to seven years old a child is a king, from 7 to 15 a slave, from 15 and older a friend,” says ancient wisdom. Do you agree with this statement?This is a very controversial expression, since,On the one hand, it is connected with a specific historical experience, on the other – with the culture of a certain people. I seriously doubt that your child-slave will become your friend in the future, especially since because of you he has already lost both the kingdom and the throne. I have already said that upbringing has a specific historical character and everything changes in the world. Upbringing also changes. Approaches to it change too. Somewhere, perhaps, the grounds for the above-stated concept of upbringing have been preserved, but certainly not in Russia or Europe. It still seems to me that we are rather Europeans… If today you do not see in your child the contours of what you want to get as a result of upbringing, if you are not busy forming a wide range of interests in your child, if you do not believe in your child, then, of course, he can become a slave and it will be difficult to make a friend out of him. You need to understand a simple truth – what we instill in a child before school, he will transmit and develop with your help. Correcting and re-educating is an extremely difficult, thankless and ineffective task. Read on the next page about how to start a conversation with children about gender issues and how much time a child can spend at the computer.