General rules of individual conversation

During the conversation, you and the baby should feel comfortable. To do this, you must observe many nuances.Conversation with the child should be trustfulPhoto: Getty Here are the main ones:

• Be friendly and considerate. Start the conversation with a smile, sincere praise of the interlocutor. Be sure to keep in touch with the eyes, show interest in the interlocutor. At the same time, avoid pressure, so that the child does not think that you are trying to rudely climb into his soul. Keep an eye on your hands and face all the time.
• Be in the zone of your comfort and do not break the comfort zone of the interlocutor. Do not think that the child does not have it.
• Construct interrogative sentences in such a way as to receive positive answers more often.
• Constantly involve the baby in the dialogue, make sure that his answers are not monosyllabic. At the same time, keep the initiative of the conversation.
• Remove psychological stress. To do this, talk on the topic that is most interesting to him.
• Always watch yourself from the outside and be critical of yourself. Remember that a mistake on your part can destroy a trusting relationship.

Be sure to remember these tips, they will help you in communication not only with your children, but with any people.

Questions as the main conversation tool

Without questions, conversation is impossible. Before its beginning clearly think out, that you ask the child. Each question should have its own purpose. Begin with more general questions and gradually move on to narrow ones to find out what interests you. Regardless of the age of the child, choose short and clear questions, there must be a logical transition between them. Never interrupt a baby and try to ask him so that he can not just say "yes" or "no". Be prepared for the fact that not only will you ask questions in the dialogue. Before the answer, make sure that you have understood everything correctly. To do this, you can rephrase the question in your own words. Answer the questions posed as clearly and fully as possible, do not ignore them and do not yulite, if you do not know the answer, you better admit it honestly. Just like you thought through the plan of questions, think over and plan answers, because you can imagine about what the child will ask you.

Learn to listen

The ability to listen is appreciated in any person. It's not as simple as it seems, this skill needs to be learned. During the hearing, constantly encourage the interlocutor with nods, with the words "yeah", "yes-yes" and others. Do not get distracted by anything. Even a simple drawing of patterns on paper during a conversation can distract and frustrate a child.Follow the rules of the conversation with the babyPhoto: Getty Be observant during the hearing. Watch not only the words of the baby, but also behind his gestures, facial expressions. Be patient. Prepare enough time for a conversation in order not to hurry the baby and not interrupt him. Periodically repeat the words of the interlocutor, and use so-called i-messages, for example, "I heard", "I understood". You can ask clarifying questions, the main thing is that they do not interrupt the main speech of the interlocutor.

Plan a conversation with a baby

The conversation will be effective only if it moves according to a given pattern. Your dialogue should have a tie, a culmination and an outcome. Here is an approximate plan:

• Support the child. Show interest to him, help start talking. At this stage, use neutral words and calm intonation.
• Clarify the situation. This will help you get more information about the problem. Ask more questions.
• Show the child that you understand what is at stake. Be interested. Repeat the thoughts of the interlocutor, paraphrasing them, highlight the main phrases.
• Show the child that you understand his feelings. Again, rephrase the interlocutor, focusing on feelings and emotions. Help the kid to reevaluate his feelings at this stage. A good phrase for this: "it seems to me that you are very upset (surprises, sad, etc.)." So the kid will look at the emotion from the side.
• Summarize what was heard. Collect all the basic facts and thoughts voiced in the dialogue.
• The final stage. Demonstrate respect for the interlocutor and his feelings, say that you appreciate his desire to resolve the issue.

Individual conversation will proceed well if at each stage you can achieve mutual understanding.

Receptions from psychology that will help you

Do not rely solely on yourself, trust psychologists and their methods.If you are a parent, then you definitely needto deal with child psychologyPhoto: Getty There are 3 interesting psychological techniques that will help you build a constructive dialogue with a child of any age.

• Mirror of relations. They say that the eyes are a mirror of the soul, in this case the person is the mirror of the relationship. Smile is the main password to the heart of the baby. Remember that a kind and gentle expression just yells to your interlocutor: "I'm a friend!". This person wants to open up. Communicating with a positive adult, the child himself becomes more positive.
• Gold words. In this case we are talking about compliments. Do not be afraid to make them baby. You can exaggerate the child's abilities a little. The main thing is that the complement should sound natural. Do not use compliments with a double meaning, that is, do not emphasize the qualities of the baby, which are both positive and negative. Also, a compliment should state the fact, but do not contain advice or, even more so, a claim. Remember, the most effective compliment is the one made against the background of the anti-payment itself.
• Patient listener. This is one of the most important psychological techniques. The child will be frank only with those who listen to him attentively, patiently, without interrupting.

These techniques seem simple, but they reallywork. Try them in the process of communication. The psychology of children is a complicated thing, so you will probably make mistakes. Be not frightened of them, know how to admit your wrongness and continue to look for an approach to crumbs with the help of communication.

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