Natalia Shevtsova, a practicing psychologist

- There may be several reasons for childhood apathy. One of them is congestion: too intensive training schedule, a lot of circles and sections, and if parents load household chores, then there is no time to be alone with them! But to understand what is interesting to him, the child is only able to be bored, when no one imposes anything from the side. The second reason is that when parents drag their child with them everywhere and everywhere, without even bothering to ask whether he likes this kind of leisure or not. Here the child also has got used, that for it all solve, from here and indifference. What is the use of wanting something if you still pull where you want it? The third reason is the identity crisis. This is the period when a teenager asks himself who he is in this world and where to go next. Usually it is maturing by age 17, but it can occur even earlier depending on individual characteristics. In this case, you just need to have patience and with understanding and respect to treat this, that is, to give the opportunity and time for a deliberate decision. But whatever the reason, the problem should be solved. And the first thing a parent can do is talk with his child heart to heart, without reproaches, assessments and kicks. A person in adolescence needs parental support and love no less than a baby. Remember yourself at this age, what worried you and what you wanted during this period. Arrange active days off: go to the woods, go fishing, or have a picnic in the nearest park. This will give the spirit of unity and shake off the raid of everyday life and tension. Those who have problems with verbal contact and the teenager flatly refuses to go on a conversation can benefit from such a method as Film therapy. With the help of a psychologist or independently choose the appropriate film and invite him to see his son / daughter or look together, and then discuss it in a friendly way, share your impression of what you saw, and ask what your child saw, what he thinks about it, what to him most of all I liked and did not like. Be sincere, do not push or try to impose your opinion. Here are some films that can help in solving this problem: "Society of the Dead Poets", "Trainee", "The Devil Wears Prada", "The Blonde in the Law", "The Legend No. 17 ", "Matrix". First, look at the film yourself and decide whether it suits your child or not, and after that, look together. If the problem is completely started and all your efforts have not yielded results, then contact a professional psychologist. Do not ask advice from your friends and do not compare your teenager with anyone else. Children are unique, and everyone has their own pace of development. Solve problems with professionals and remember that the roots of children's problems are always hidden in us. Therefore, help yourself first, and, perhaps, your child will get it right.

Anastasia Kusmartseva, child psychologist

Photo:Getty Images— There are no children who are uninterested in everything, uninterested in anything. Not foreseen by the nature of such a phenomenon. From an early age, a child shows interest in the world, in knowing everything around him. And here the behavior model of the people around him is very important. How do they react to his manifestations of independence, interest, what information is given by “look how interesting this world is” or “don’t touch it, this world is dangerous.” After all, it’s no secret that a small child is very susceptible and sensitive to behavior the people around him. For a child from birth to one year old, the mother is the first source of information about the world around him. And in the future, the family is the first society where the child forms his own model of behavior, which he then carries over for the rest of his life. Everyone is already born with their own interests in one direction or another, and the task of parents is to see this direction and help in moving along a given path, help to reveal themselves in this area. Unfortunately, as a rule, we see a completely different model of behavior in parents. Authoritarian type of upbringing "I know better what you need!" and “Do as it is said!” when the child's opinion is not taken into account at all. Often they do this out of good intentions, but they do not at all notice that they are imposing their model of happiness on their daughter or son, not giving them the opportunity to choose and show independence. This behavior backfires in adolescence with exactly what we are talking about, indifference to everything or the inability to focus on one thing. So what to do with a teenager if he has no personal interests? - Start working on the mistakes and first of all evaluate the quality of your communication with the child. From what position do you communicate: positions "from above" are constantly trying to dominate, positions "together" - you communicate at the same social level; - evaluate what role the child has in the family, what responsibilities are assigned to him. How important is his opinion in solving certain family issues; - how much his vital need for self-realization is satisfied, how is he realizing himself in areas that are interesting to him (interesting to him, not you); - what does your child do best, what makes him happy. Computer games don't count. They, as a rule, are a way to get away, to escape from a reality that does not accept him and in which he cannot self-actualize. your situation, a deeper analysis of it, a child psychologist can always help you with this. We all want to grow a personality out of our child, therefore, you need to treat him accordingly, and not like a slave who is obliged to obediently follow all your orders. Do not forget to praise!

Denis Razumovsky, teacher-psychologist, author of "Obedient parents of disobedient children"

- It all depends on the age.Usually this problem arises in parents of teenagers who were not taught independence in childhood, who were often simply left to themselves or who had too much free time, and they did not learn how to properly manage it. In general, know that the child should not have free time. you teach him to fill all the hours and minutes with chores from three areas: circles, study and household chores. Is the child too young to properly allocate time during the day? Sit down, create a schedule and to-do list with him, and teach him how to prioritize. Is that exactly what you did with a child under 10 years old? Then, chances are, you are past the problem that your teen doesn't want to do anything. By the age of 12-15, he will already have favorite hobbies, and he will be able to allocate his time. He does not want to do anything ... It is important to understand the difference here. Does he go to the circle, but whine when he walks? Or does he not go anywhere at all, but only lies at home and watches TV or plays on the computer? In the first case, everything is not so bad, and your task is to support him and praise him for his successes. Just notice that a teenager is better at taking praise directly. Let's say you talk to your mom or friend on the phone and tell them about the child's good results in some business. Children hear everything, and praise stimulates the next movement forward.A photo: Getty Images If he does not want anything at all ... Try to apply the principle from the opposite. He, for example, does not want to go to a concert with his friends, and you ask him at this time to wash windows with you or to clean the apartment: he chooses the lesser of two evils and goes to the concert. And remember, if you want something badly , then the child wants it less and less.

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