How to choose a school for a child: profile, with a bias, general education

"Which school will you go to?""- Sergely asked me one of the mothers in the locker room kindergarten. From the surprise I hiccup. At the time of this question, my son was barely five years old. "I did not even think about it," I admitted. My answer surprised me. And she enthusiastically began to list already selected options. I listened half-heartedly and politely nodded, not going to hammer my head with anything similar for at least a year. But in vain.Photo:GettyImagesI had to deal with this issue in earnest last fall. To be honest, at first I didn’t even bother. The system of “assigning” addresses to specific schools – they introduced it in St. Petersburg several years ago – suited me perfectly. No nighttime bonfires under the windows of schools, no multi-kilometer queues or roll calls. They won’t leave you without a seat at a desk, and thank God. Fortunately, the entrance to the nearest temple of science is three steps from my front door. Perfect! My steadfastness was shaken after I talked to a neighbor. Her eldest son became a first-grader at this very school in September. And in two years, if they don’t move, she will have to send two more twin boys here. “I’ve already been to the education department fourteen times in two months,” the mother of many children admitted to me. “I ask them to transfer my child somewhere. They refuse, saying there are no places. But I’ve never seen such lawlessness. And theft, and extortion. The knowledge they give is weak. And the contingent is not the most pleasant - two regular first grades and two correctional, for the mentally retarded. Of course, I am not against inclusion, but ... "At this moment I got nervous. I definitely do not need such happiness.

To get to the best

I decided to discuss the issue with my friends,whose children are our peers. And I realized that, firstly, I was hopelessly behind the situation. Secondly, mothers, it seems, advocating for quality education, satisfy their own ambitions first and foremost. And, thirdly, no system can withstand parental pressure. Do you need a residence permit? Then you will have one! “I chose a physics and mathematics school. The best in the area. The headmistress at the meeting immediately said that she could not take everyone who wanted to. Well, I had to buy a registration and use my connections.” This is my friend Katya. Her son Sasha does not yet have any obvious inclinations towards the exact sciences, or, in principle, towards studying. He would like to kick a ball around and watch cartoons. But his mother has already decided everything for him. She left the question of whether he will be able to handle the complicated physics in high school unanswered. “We are going either to Spanish or Italian. You can’t do without languages these days. For the next year, we registered with friends to go to school, that will be enough. We go there for preparatory courses. Of course, it is difficult to study there." This is my other neighbor, Yulia. She is sending her twins to first grade. However, she honestly admits that she is not sure that the girls will be able to handle the workload. Moreover, there are many people who want to get there and the classes are too large: 30-35 people. Yes, now this is also possible, in 2016, the norm according to which there should be no more than 25 students in a class was excluded from the Sanitary Rules and Regulations.Photo:GettyImages“Well, we’ll get a tutor, if anything,” sighs Yulia. A tutor, Karl! For first-graders who just need to master the school curriculum. “We’re sending the boy to a cadet class. Let him grow up to be a man.” This is Kirill’s dad. His son is a tender little dandelion, whom his father decided to raise to be a real man. Unless, of course, they break his psyche first. His mother clutches her head, but she won’t go against her husband’s word. “And we’re going to a private school. It’s expensive, of course, 25 thousand a month. But there, personality is paramount, not grades. They don’t even give them grades, they work on a credit system. European education. And the classes are small.” I really wanted to go to that school myself. I started asking our classmate’s mom for details. It turned out that “personality” is great, but they don’t always manage to complete the compulsory program there. And the education there is exclusively primary. And the classes are small - sometimes 10 people, sometimes only 2. I imagined how this "personality" would come after such careful treatment to the mass fifth grade of a regular school, and I felt sick. No, thank you, this does not suit us.

Children do not care

Maybe I don't understand something?I had to go to the kindergarten psychologist with this question. Like, am I a bad mother if I don’t try to get my child into a specialized school right now? Maybe I should go out of my way to get into some humanities lyceum? “It’s practically impossible to guess now which sciences a schoolchild will gravitate towards,” the specialist reassured me. “In my practice, there are many examples when a child who draws beautifully abandons painting in the seventh grade and becomes interested in mathematics. Or, on the contrary, a sports fan suddenly starts writing pretty good poems and stories. In elementary grades, talking about any kind of career guidance is pointless.” It’s enough if the chosen school is simply good. And whether it has a profile or not, the first-grader doesn’t care. It’s clear that parents choose lyceums and gymnasiums in the hope that they will have better conditions, but they don’t take into account that modern children have so many additional loads that an intensive program can simply harm them.Photo: GettyImagesP. S.It all makes sense.But I still don't want to go to the school at home. It's not even good enough, with all due respect to its teachers. The issue was resolved quickly: we registered in my husband's old apartment. The most ordinary school is also registered there. But parents speak very warmly of it, saying that they support their children's desire to study. That's why we applied to it. Because, from my point of view, this is what is important in a school. And the profile will follow.