What words to support a manPhoto: Getty
How can I support a man
It's hard to argue with the opinion that great menare made by brilliant wives. This is actually so: it is on the woman that not only the atmosphere in the house depends, but also the mental attitude, the energy potential of her beloved. A wise woman should know with what words she suddenly finds herself in a difficult situation, and how to really help him. The rules are quite simple.
- If a man is clearly not in the mood, frowns,nervous, sharply and briefly answers questions and generally behaves unusually, you do not have to climb to him with questions. Obsession will cause irritation, and instead of constructive communication, you will get no one scandal unnecessary.
- The main rule of the crisis situation is to freeze anddo not make sudden movements. Act like usual, do not go into the soul, but watch the situation. Give your husband time, provide silence, no fuss and a delicious dinner. He wants to talk - he will come. You will only have to correctly unravel the non-verbal signals: frowning eyebrows or polysemantic phrases.
- But if the silence dragged on, it is necessaryshow your participation. This should be done as gently as possible. For example, say: "I see something happened, it's hard and bad for you. I'm close, at any time you can count on me when you're ready to talk. I will do anything to help you, because I love you. " Nobody except you knows your man better, and only you can find the right words.
- Denote your proximity, willingness to help you canand without words, just being near. Lie down or sit down, doing something unobtrusive: a book, a tablet, a handmade (but only if it does not annoy your husband!).
- If he does not mind, you can do a light massage of the back, head, feet. The physical contact brings together and at the same time relieves stress.
The main thing is to show that you understand the complexity of the situation, respect any decision of the man and are ready to help in both deed and word.
What you do not need
What a man does not really need, so thisfeminine pity, obsession, excessive sugary tenderness, chatter and futile bustle. Empathy and pity are not at all equivalent things. The first is constructive and beneficial, it gives strength to act and solve the problem, the second is senseless and destructive. It is not necessary to try and relieve tension by artificial animation, or, God forbid, unhealthy irony. Both can cause an explosion of aggression, irritation. You need to take into account both the situation as a whole and certain nuances: the character of the beloved, the temperament, the state of health. To understand how to properly support a man, you need to imagine the area of life in which there was trouble. Picking up the right strategy of behavior, you can keep a harmonious relationship and strengthen your intimacy. Also interesting:
