Mother shared the last days of her dying son's life

In the photo to the left - a small bald boy onnamed after Nolan. He curled up on the rug in the bathroom and waited for Mom to come out of the shower. In the photo on the left there's nobody ... Nolan is no more. He died at the age of 4 years from cancer. After two months his mother Ruth wrote a message to her son. You read it - and you can not hold back your tears. "Two months. Two months since I held you in my arms, I listened to you, how you loved me, kissed those pies-pies. Two months since you clung to me curled up. Two months of absolute hell. "A year ago, Nolan started breathing problems. Parents thought the child had a common cold. And then the doctors called the diagnosis - rhabdomyosarcoma. Type of cancer that affects muscles and bones.Photo: @nolanscullyPhoto:@nolanscullyThe baby suffered from severe pain, and in the last days of his life he could not even eat or drink - he was constantly vomiting. A huge tumor had grown inside his little body, squeezing his heart and bronchi. When doctors said that the cancer was incurable, Ruth decided to have an honest talk with her son. She laid his head on her shoulder and asked: - Are you having trouble breathing, my boy? - Yes, Mom. - Are you in pain, baby? - Yes ... - This cancer sucks. You don't have to fight it anymore. - You don't?! But I will! For you, Mom! - Are you fighting for Mom? - Well, yes! - Nolan, what is your mom's job? - To protect me from danger. - Honey, I can't do this anymore. The only way I can protect you now is in heaven. - So I'm going to fly to heaven and play there until you come. You will come, right? - Of course! You can't get rid of Mom that easily.A photo: @ nolanscullyThe last months Nolan spent in the hospice. Ruth came to the boy to take him home for the night. I wanted to spend another evening together with him. "I waited for Nolan to wake up. Seeing me, he gently laid his hand on mine and said: "Mummy, it's all right. Let's stay here. " My 4-year-old hero tried to make it easier for me. The next 36 hours during the breaks between sleep we played, watched the videos on Youtube and had fun as best we could. Then we lay together and he said what funeral they wanted, what people should wear . He told me not to forget to take his beloved teddy bear. Then he wrote what he left to each of us, and asked us to remember him as ... a policeman. About 9 pm I asked Nolan if he would not mind if I went to the shower. He said: "Well, Mom, Uncle Chris will sit with me." "I'll be there in two seconds," I said. He smiled and I closed the bathroom door. Then the doctors said: as soon as I left, he closed his eyes and fell asleep deeply. Life began to leave him.Photo:@nolanscullyWhen I came out of the bathroom, there was a team of doctors standing around his bed. They looked at me and everyone had tears in their eyes. “Ruth, Nolan is in a deep sleep,” the doctors said. “He can’t feel a thing. His breathing is labored and his oxygen levels are dropping.” I ran to my son, held him close, and then a miracle happened that I will never forget… My angel sighed, opened his eyes and smiled. “I love you, Mommy,” Nolan said, turning his head towards me. At 11:45 am, he died while I was singing “You Are My Sunshine” in his ear. He woke up from a coma to tell me with a smile on his face that he loved me! My son died a hero. He was a warrior who went with dignity and love in his heart. Now I’m afraid to go into the shower. Because there’s nothing waiting for me anymore except an empty bath mat, the same one where a little boy once waited for his mother.”