Communication with older children: features, psychology

Features of communication with older children

When a child grows up, parents should do thisaccept. The model of behavior that was practiced at an early age, where excessive care, education, and moralizing prevailed, is no longer suitable. It is on this basis that many conflicts with adult children arise.Communication with adult children should bring joy to both partiesPhoto: GettyIn order for communication to go well and be pleasant for both parties, you need to adhere to the following rules:

Advice and guidance are necessary and important, but the childwill perceive them correctly only when he asks for help himself. He must be given the opportunity to demonstrate independence in solving important issues. Even if he makes mistakes - these are his mistakes, which over time will become life experience.
Do not be offended by an adult son or daughter, ifthey come or call not as often as we would like. The child has personal affairs, needs, family, work, etc. A quiet conversation, in which the parent will try to explain what he would like to see more often a son or daughter, will give a much greater result than offense and accusation.
When a child leaves his or her home and beginsindependent life, parents have a lot of free time, which they previously dedicated to their child. Try to take this time with something new, discover new hobbies, hobbies.

Grown-up children do not need instructions and moralizing. They can put up with this out of respect for their elders. But sooner or later such communication will provoke a conflict situation.

Psychology of conflicts between parents and children

The bulk of disagreements arise on the basis ofhigh demands and expectations from both sides. Mom and Dad expect respect and gratitude from their children, and they, in turn, believe that parents who have never refused them anything should continue to indulge their whims. Not getting what they want, the child remains dissatisfied with their parents and believes that they do not love them enough. Comparing their lives and the lives of their peers, children can even blame their parents for not giving them something. And they are not interested in the reasons for such "injustice". Over time, older children, of course, come to the realization of how much mom and dad have given them. After all, they give everything they can at that time, often denying themselves their needs. To prevent this from happening too late, you need to talk to each other more, try to be calm and restrained. This will help to avoid conflicts.