About obedience

What if the child does not want to hear the parents' requests?First, by my rules, you should notspeak more than once. Secondly, the child's psyche is so arranged that the child really can not hear from the first time, so we must work to hear. If you did not wash the dishes, what you asked for, then in the morning you get breakfast in a dirty dish. It's lazy to brush your teeth - take your phone or computer, without raising your voice. By the way, some adults can also not hear from the first time: responsible for this myelin sheath, enveloping nerve fibers, is formed by the age of 30.Photo: Getty Images

About the lies

A child often lies. How to deal with this?First of all, we need to identify the reason why hethe question answers untruth. Children's lies are three: fear, profit and unmotivated lies, when children come up with something that was not. When you determine the reason the child does this, you can eliminate it. Then the son or daughter will stop fearing you. Or it would be unprofitable to deceive you. If you can not find the cause yourself, then I recommend that you contact a child psychologist.

About study

The son said that it is not interesting for him to study at school, and now he has completely sunk into the sculls, the non-attestation threatens. How to influence this situation? If the child has rolled on deuces, your task -first of all, take him to a child psychologist and find out why he does not want to study. If the specialist determines that everything is in order, leave him alone. Forget about motivation, intelligent conversations, restrictions - it's useless. Let the non-certification be a matter of his choice, let him stay for a second year. I'm sure, he will not want to fall so he will not want to, and the child will start to learn himself. And come up due to the fact that there is nowhere to go. You can also suggest not to go to school, but instead switch to home schooling or an external school system. And be sure to inform that under the law of the Russian Federation every citizen is required to get an education, otherwise he will have to pay a fine.Photo: Getty Images

About money

Should the child have pocket money and how much?From the age of six, children must have pocket money,not "tied" to the behavior, or to the assessments in the school. From this age the child gradually learns how to manage money. The amount should be symbolic, so that you can buy some small things, at the most - a kinder-surprise. If he wants to buy something at a cost more than the money that you give in a week, he will start to postpone. Thus the child grows up, shapes his desires and notices that you are with him. Exceptions can be, only if you notice cigarettes or alcohol - then no pocket money.

About rivalry

The husband is often unhappy with his son, constantly makes comments, raises his voice, and does not behave with his daughter. How to explain that he is wrong?My answer is this: if you tell your spouse the truth, he will not understand. According to the psychoanalysis of Sigmund Freud, the husband is jealous of his son to his wife. At a reception, a woman told the following situation: "We are sitting together on a couch, with a husband and a three-year-old son, watching TV. And then I notice that he slowly moves towards the child and slowly pushes him off the couch. When the child is on the floor and screams, I understand that my husband did it on purpose. " This behavior of the man is explained by the fact that the younger generation steps on the heels, thereby causing wild irritation. That is, in the subconscious of the father, the son is a growing competitor, while the man does not suspect this. In this case, it is necessary to say: "If you love your son, accept him as he is, despite bad schooling, bad habits and strange behavior."Photo: Getty Images

About Conflicts

We constantly quarrel, and often with scandals there is a child. Do I need to try to keep the family together?Setting that you need to save the family for the sake of children,not always true. Can you pull this "strap" - it's up to you, but the child definitely will not benefit from seeing scandals and fights between mom and dad. Divorce, of course, for a child - a psychotrauma, he can even feel guilty in this situation, such is his psyche. Therefore, parents should tell the child that he is not guilty of anything, this is the problem of adults and you will still love him, only you will live separately. You do not need to be a hostage to children in order to avoid further unhealthy relationships with them, because then this kind of reproaches may begin: "Yes, I gave you my best years of life, and at least you called my mother!"

About health

The child has a diagnosis - ADHD (a syndrome of hyperactivity and attention deficit, - Ed.). Do I need to help him in school and monitor his academic performance?No, neither one nor the other is not necessary. The child needs to be treated, and abroad: there are no specialists in this direction in Russia and some drugs that successfully treat ADHD all over the world are banned. Do not waste time and money on local specialists, half of whom do not even think that this is a diagnosis. The disease is 25 years old, and 25 percent of children all over the world are ill with it. Fortunately, it is very successfully treated. You can find a child psychoneurologist who will prescribe a course of treatment, and the question of help will be closed - the child will cope with the studies himself.

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