The most mysterious matter is the human soul. Everyone has it, but no one knows what it is ... A soul can not be seen with ultrasound examination, touching a hand and even just looking at it. Yes, even an exact definition - and then there is no. But nevertheless, the human soul is constantly becoming the object of close attention. And sooner or later each person starts to "dig" in himself. And this oh how difficult. But nevertheless it is necessary - the importance of self-knowledge is almost impossible to overestimate, it will never be superfluous. The process of self-knowledge is not easy - the way to yourself is long and thorny. On the road, various difficulties and obstacles can occur in the face of fears and complexes, psychological defenses and other "evil monsters." But the reward for the passage of this complex path is worth it - this is knowledge about the most important person in the world, knowledge of your own self. Know yourself, and you will be granted true happiness! And do not postpone the process of self-knowledge for a long time - then it will be even more difficult. If you set yourself the task of knowing yourself - congratulations, this is the beginning of the road. Very many try to solve this problem with the help of a psychologist or training in personal growth, believing that the process of self-discovery will be easier. However, the question of how to know oneself, without resorting to outside help, remains topical. It is the features of self-knowledge that will become the topic of our today's conversation. So, knowledge and self-knowledge in person! There is nothing difficult in this if you really want to comprehend yourself.
Our wonderful and beautiful inner world
Self-knowledge is better to start with attention toown body. Yes, the ways of self-knowledge are numerous and it's not the worst of them. In the insane rhythm of modern life, our body sometimes resembles a driven horse, but when it tries to tell us about it, we do not hear it. And then our body starts to hurt - various diseases develop. It is quite possible to establish contact with your body - it's enough to pay attention to how it reacts to everything that's happening to us. At first it will be difficult, but it is necessary again and again to shift the focus of attention to your inner feelings - and then it will become a matter of habit. Another zone, the realization of which is an important element of self-knowledge is a zone of feelings and emotions. It is impossible to go through the next stages of self-knowledge, bypassing this one. In everyday life we often follow the mind, not noticing that some rational solutions cause us complete rejection at the emotional level. For example, we hide anger and resentment, considering their expression stupid and meaningless, which leads to the concealment of true emotions from ourselves. The goal is not to show anyone your irritation. And in fact - some internal problems. It is from receiving information from these two zones that self-knowledge begins. In a week you will find out about yourself a lot of new and interesting things. It may be the fact that your head hurts every time your friend Masha calls you to drink coffee. Moreover, every time you drink coffee with Masha, you begin to experience such fatigue and boredom that you often simply "turn off" from communicating with her. Self-knowledge will help to exclude such situations here. Another important layer of knowledge about yourself is knowing about your needs. It would seem that it is very simple to answer the question: "What do I want?" But this is far from the case - many desires, which we think we are experiencing, are not really ours. They can be imposed from the outside or misinterpreted by us. It happens that a woman often wants to eat, accordingly, she has a lot and gets fat. Although in fact in half the cases she wants to drink, and if she had drunk a glass of water at these times, she would have felt much better and would have been slimmer. Of course, this example is the most primitive, but the most graphic. Do you feel that you are tired and can not even prepare dinner? Prilyagte for 15 minutes - only without a laptop and a TV. If you fall asleep, you are really tired. But most likely, your fatigue as a hand will remove in a few minutes - probably, you wanted a little silence. It is difficult to name certain methods that make self-knowledge easier - the most important thing in this case is to listen to your body. When you learn to understand the real needs of your body, you can put a more complex goal - self-knowledge of your emotions. Do not expect an easy victory - the way will be long and thorny. To begin with, learn to deal with your mood. Do not put an unattainable goal - do not expect that you will succeed at once. Self-knowledge is a long process and sometimes takes more than one year. Therefore, your first goal is to learn to understand the true cause of your bad mood. After all, most people do not know how to do this! Well, melancholy, well, irritation - with who does not happen? And the person does not know that the reason for the bad mood lies in lack of sleep, or yesterday's quarrel with colleagues, or other trivia. The third stage of self-knowledge is self-control: without this nothing will come out. You will be able to understand yourself only if you learn to control yourself. And we are not talking about anger or irritation - in this case, the so-called "ten. As soon as you feel anger - slowly count to ten, and then answer or take any measures. But control over anger is not enough - learn to control your emotional impulses, your desires. And it is much more difficult. Have you seen the thing you liked? Do not rush to buy it immediately, even if the necessary amount is with you. Try to wait at least a couple of days. And so in everything - excerpts well stimulates self-knowledge. Each time the goal can be complicated - today it's a new handbag, and tomorrow a vacation package.
The Dark Side of Personality
After training in these simple waysconcentrating on yourself, you can move on to studying your personality. The famous psychologist Eric Berne, author of "People who play games" and the founder of transactional analysis, wrote that during his life people are in three types of states: a child, an adult and a parent. What are these states?
- Child
The condition of the child contains all ourthe naturally arising desires and motivations. This is the most creative, fun and direct part of a person. Being in this state, we begin to behave as if in childhood. This is due to the fact that the children's part contains memories of the experiences, attitudes and actions of that time. To great regret, very often the goal of a person is to kill a child. Do not do this, otherwise life will become too fresh.
- Adult
This is a rational and reasonable part of the personality. Being in the adult state, we really perceive the reality and get objective information about it. Based on the information received, the adult, being calm and reasonable, realistically assesses his capabilities and acts in accordance with them. Also necessary component of the personality and very often self-knowledge allows it to manifest completely.
- Parent
The most conservative and strict part of personality. Contains the attitudes and judgments learned from the outside from the elders, most often from the parents. In behavior, they are expressed in care and criticism in relation to others. In small quantities, a very useful component of the personality, the purpose of which is to prevent rash and impulsive actions. And, of course, help a person make the right decision. Gestalt psychology is also trying to find an answer to the question: "how to know yourself?". Gestaltists believe that a healthy person is a whole person who calmly accepts any of its sides. Such a person is able to adapt creatively to a constantly changing world. He is multifaceted and can behave differently in different circumstances. But this behavior can not boast of everyone. On the contrary, in our lives we most often choose for ourselves one character trait that we want to possess, and we reject the one that is the opposite. For example, you think that you need to be kind and sympathetic and support these qualities in yourself and other people, rejecting rudeness and tactlessness. And what in the end? All friends shamelessly use your kindness and reliability, thereby depriving you of a normal life. Girlfriends are dragging their offspring to you at any time of day or night - today their mother-in-law comes, tomorrow - she leaves, and the day after tomorrow I want to arrange a romantic evening, in the scenario of which the child does not fit well. Friends take up to pay before you, and most often forget to give back the debt, the parent committee is sure that nobody will stick the wallpaper in the class better than you. Familiar? The list can be continued indefinitely. Situations can change, but people have the same goal - to take advantage of your "right" side of personality. However, a healthy person allows himself to be both good and rough, freely moving from one to the other. If you fail once or twice to your exploiters, lay siege to the sulky ham - you will not become worse from it. Of course, to move all imaginable and unimaginable facets, too, is not worth it. If only to become selfish and rude is not your goal. Know yourself and try to find such clamps, because each of us has enough of them. A person finds himself in a dead end when he gets stuck in one of such polarities. The task of self-discovery is to find them and restore the flexibility of behavior through permission to be any. This is the main goal, for which in general it makes sense to comprehend self-knowledge. In other cases, you are unlikely to succeed.
The road is a lifetime
Self-knowledge is an almost endless process:it cannot be completed. More precisely - it is possible, but not because there is nowhere to go further, but because you do not want to or it is very difficult. This state can occur if, in the process of self-knowledge, one approaches one's own complexes, strange desires or dark sides of one's own personality. However, overcoming such a barrier implies personal growth, although it requires some resources. In general, you don't need to turn off the road to yourself. Self-discovery is a process that can go on throughout your life, making it unforgettable. Thanks to him, you get the opportunity to experience contact with yourself, as well as to be open in relationship with the world. It is on this basis that your little personal happiness can be built. Good luck and pleasant discoveries along the way! Now that you know what self-knowledge is, this nut is in your teeth! We advise you to read: