happy There are many types of depression, and eithereach of them is sick every fourth person on the planet. The features of this common disease and the ways of treatment are told by the psychotherapist Richard O'Connor in the book "Depression is canceled" by the publishing house Mann, Ivanov, Ferber. That's what he advises those who have not yet plunged into desperation (when more serious medical care is needed), but already suffers from apathy, low self-esteem and gloomy thoughts:

  • Set realistic goals

Depressive, pessimistic and insecure in themselvespeople avoid goal-setting, trying to protect themselves from disappointments. They do not understand that lack of goals leads to a completely different set of problems, which is often even worse. Aspiring to the goal, you grow above yourself, even if you do not reach it. A study comparing people who became disabled after the accident, with winners in the lottery, showed that a year after these events, both groups returned to their original psychological state. If a person was unhappy before he became rich, he will be unhappy with money. If he was joyful and brisk, even becoming an invalid, he will remain cheerful and cheerful. However, depressed people do not trust their ability to adapt to bad news, begin to avoid setting important tasks and live without direction. The goal is simply to live up to the next day. Scientific research shows that simple action - setting a specific goal - can improve both your sensations and your productivity. If you decide to write a book, set a goal to write X pages a day, and not just foggy "write" on the mood. So you concentrate on how to reach your destination. And when approaching the goal, you will feel much happier.

  • Form the right attitude to work

A paradoxical situation: during work, people feel their skills and see their tasks, therefore they consider themselves to be happy, strong, creative and satisfied. In their spare time they understand that there is nothing to do, their skills are not in demand, therefore they tend to experience sadness, weakness, despondency and dissatisfaction. Nevertheless, they want to work less and spend more time on rest. Most of us used to think of work as something imposed. Even if we see a challenge and an incentive, we believe that it benefits someone else, not ourselves, and is inclined to view the work as a period subtracted from the time granted to us for enjoying life. How much better it would be if we could change the perception of the work and feel that the time spent for business is a chance to be happy, and not just the days taken out of the allotted years. Your attention should be focused on activities, so during work try not to be distracted by other incentives. Deep involvement helps a person forget about all the unpleasant aspects of life. The inner critic stops talking. We forget about ourselves for a while, but after doing the job, it makes us feel better. It is good, when there is a quick return, which allows you to track success and correct behavior in time.

  • If the work is still not fun

Many people get stuck at work that does not bringno joy (given the economic crisis, there will be more and more of them), but we have to thank the fate that there is at least something. If this is your case, you can always do several things to make the work more enjoyable.

  • Try to give all the best. Work is an arena where we are given the opportunity to contribute, and this itself can become a great source of happiness. To create something new or unique, solve complex problems or influence the future - this can give meaning to our lives.
  • If the work does not provide anything other than funds toexistence, do not take it too seriously. Try to be prepared and friendly, every day to find an occasion for enjoyment. Add a game element to work. Simultaneously, add a meaning to life in the hours of rest: develop your skills, participate in the volunteer movement, learn how to sing or draw.
  • Try to treat your colleagues well,clients, any person with whom you are in contact. If you are able to make their day a little better, it is very likely that they will reciprocate when such an opportunity arises. The working environment can be more pleasant simply because you will try to change it.
  • Spend money wisely. If you go to work just for the money, use them correctly. Do not let them go to the wind. Save to buy something really important that meets your needs. In the long run, for money, you can buy only two good things: safety and freedom. Therefore, try to have enough in your account to leave if necessary.
  • If the conditions are really terrible - workto quit before you become unhappy. Keep your resume ready and send it whenever you can. Follow the announcements and news on the Internet. Think about moving. Master another profession.
  • If possible, take advantage of the benefitsnew economy. It is now easier to work at home, at non-standard time, to plan whole weeks outside the workplace. Although each of these pluses has potential drawbacks, you can still become a boss of yourself and get more time for family and recreation.
    • Look for sources of pride and self-esteem

    Reconsider your view on achievements, praiseyourself more often and be proud of your successes, even if they seem insignificant to you. Perhaps it is possible to take a few minutes to read a book together with a capricious child - this is already a major achievement, not only because it is difficult to find time, but also because it has benefited the child. Regardless of whether you love your job or not, it's important not to forget that it brings many reasons to feel pride. You take a lot for granted, forgetting to reward yourself with praise. No less important achievement than salary, the fact that you get up and on time come to work, are there until the end of the day, sometimes doing complicated or unpleasant things. This can also be a source of self-respect! When moving to a service-oriented society, more and more professions are accompanied not by physical, but emotional stress. All the posts where you need to work with people require the ability to manage themselves, play a role. We must make a good face in a bad game and control the expression of our true feelings. However, control must come from a conscious, thoughtful desire to do the job well, and not from the belief that our feelings are unacceptable by themselves. Sometimes we have all the reasons to be out of sorts, but we have to restrain ourselves. This is professionalism, and this can be proud of! Remember right now, for what recent achievements you are worthy of praise. Maybe you fed a homeless kitten, supported a friend in a difficult situation, or just made morning exercises?

    • Define your core values

    To make your life more meaningfuland happy, do the following exercise: 1. Write a list of ten or more items for the sake of which, in your opinion, it is worth living. Do not worry - the list should not be either perfect or complete, because you will return to it several times. Try not to think about the "right" values: just write down what comes to mind without ratings. If becoming a saint is not part of your priorities, and going to good restaurants is included, do not worry about it. This list is just for you. Nobody except you will never see him, and you deserve the most honest information you can only. 2. Set it aside for a few days, then repeat the exercise. Do not look at the old list - start from scratch. Proceed from the fact that for the first time you could miss some obvious things - simply because you take them for granted, or for any of thousands of other reasons. Then, after a few more days, make a list for the third time. 3. Now merge all three lists. If any of the items are repeated, enter them as one, but next to them, note how many times they appeared. If you notice that some items are just examples of a larger idea (for example, dancing and visiting concerts can be considered a love for music), consider them repetitions. Then try to arrange these items in order of importance for you. It will be a difficult choice, but do not get hung up. Do not worry if you can not decide what's more important - to have sex or to eat deliciously. Nevertheless, you should be able to roughly order all the items and see, for example, that both sex and good food are more important to you than golf. Or vice versa. 4. Painful part of the exercise: for the next few days, keep a diary - write down what you did. Keep track of how much time you actually spend on deeds and states marked as top priorities. If you are one of many, you will be discouraged when you see how much time is wasted on cases that are not on the list at all. You can see that the time is spent on optional low-level tasks, for example, surfing the Internet. Consciously look at how you spend your time, and try to increase its value. Plan the evenings and days off ahead of time. Organize your holidays according to your highest priorities. Spend more time with friends and family. Save time on television and the Internet. At the same time, allow yourself a little emotional inaction. If you constantly deal with priority matters, you can very quickly wear yourself out. Growth and change are hard work. But the cruel truth is that we either grow up, or die, or challenge ourselves, or we fall into stagnation. Therefore, follow these tips: define goals, look for ways to self-actualize, act and do not forget to praise yourself for success.

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