Regardless of what causesmoving to another city, this event, as a rule, in itself becomes stress. Everything is changed: you do not know the geography of new places, the orders established there, and you absolutely do not have anyone to find out. Life in the new city has, literally, to learn on its own. And this only strengthens the difficulties that have fallen on your head. Therefore, if you want to facilitate the process of moving and adapting, you will have to make friends in the new city.

Territory of acquaintances

Naturally, the first thing that comes to mind in connection withthis problem - but how do people get acquainted? In childhood, everything was so simple: you approach the person you like and offer your friendship, and then friends appear by themselves. And when you are faced with the need to initiate this process on your own, this is a very difficult task. However, there are places that in themselves have people for easy and pleasant communication:

Clubs on interests After all, do you have such a thing in your life?business or occupation that you like to devote time to? It can be cooking, singing in the choir, photography - anything you like, if only you really liked it! But it's not at all necessary to do what you love alone - it's much more fun to find like-minded people. For example, if you like reading books - go to a library or a book cafe. In any case, try to find a place where people can gather, just like you, who are keen on this hobby. Visiting him, do not rush to go home immediately after class - better chat with like-minded people, because it's the easiest way to make friends.

Volunteering Have you ever studiedcharity? If the answer is no, then it's time to start! Volunteering is not only a great way to make friends in a new city, but also a wonderful soul-enhancing business that can bring a lot of positive emotions. However, at the same time, it takes a lot of time and mental energy - this should be ready. Find out where charitable organizations are located in the city, find the coordinates of people involved in expanding the volunteer network. In addition, you can just appear on the nearest charity event, where there are always a lot of people. And you will find your friends, and perhaps the whole life.

Internet Even this article you are now sitting andYou read on the Internet. It's great that now people do not have any problems with finding information, because there is always a source that can be accessed at any time. The possibilities of the World Wide Web are truly endless: through social networks and communities you can keep in touch with old friends and try to make new ones, and forums and all sorts of interest communities open a vast space for your imagination. You can just go to the largest forum of your new city and see what kind of people live here.

Cafes and restaurants It would seem, in the new city whereit's easier to order a takeaway meal or just to dine at home. But do not rush to become a recluse! Start a tradition at least once a week to go out to dinner or dinner "in people." Of course, at first it may seem awkward, but in fact, when you are alone, it is much easier for you to approach and get acquainted. The evening will be pleasant and easy, if you grab an interesting book from home - it's better in a paper version, because in this case it can become a worthy topic for conversation. The same, but with some changes, concerns bars, clubs and parks - a lonely person immediately wants to be involved in their social circle.

Photography This is not so much a place as an occupation,which greatly facilitates the expansion of the network of contacts. Agree, almost everyone likes to be photographed and then consider their own photos. That's why, after learning to take good pictures, you can always approach any stranger and ask him to become the object of your work. Thus, photographing people is a great way to entertain yourself, learn a new city, and at the same time make friends.

How to start a conversation?

With places we figured out, and here's your view fallson the person with whom you would like to make acquaintance. But here you are faced with the complexity: and how do you start a conversation with someone you absolutely do not know? Do not be surprised, but it's pretty simple, if you know how to do it. The most important thing is to choose people who are open and ready to talk. With them you will not have problems related to acquaintance, because they are just like you, are interested in communication. Usually this is indicated by a smile and a look directed towards you, and a relaxed posture. You can non-verbally respond to these signs - and that's all, the contact is set. But what about verbalism? There are several variants of the topic for conversation, and, by and large, they can be divided into three groups:

• Situation;
• The interlocutor;
• I myself;

Regardless of the topic, the main goal for you should beremain the desire to interest the interlocutor. Therefore, you can start a conversation by stating a fact, expressing an opinion or asking a question. It is better to start with the latter, since there is always more energy in the question than in anything else. Although the statement of opinion also stimulates the conversation quite well, the partner is involved in contact, and it is much more difficult for him to remain passive. Of course, the easiest and most convenient way to start a conversation is to discuss the situation or the circumstances in which you are with the partner. He practically does not require special knowledge of the person opposite, so he can be used to contact a stranger. In addition, this topic almost does not provoke the emergence of anxiety in the interlocutor and much more involved in the conversation than the story about yourself. In order to start a conversation about the situation, carefully look around. It is best to find something interesting and amazing. It can be an object that the interlocutor will be happy to talk about, or a phenomenon that is important and evokes emotions in most people. Listen carefully to the partner responding to your cue. Strangely enough, you can talk about anything, for example, in a store you can ask the buyer who buys an unusual product, which can be prepared from it. Dale Carnegie also noticed that people like to talk about themselves more than anything in the world. That is why, if you ask the interlocutor about the question about him, he, most likely, will be happy to answer it. However, before you start a conversation, we recommend that you observe a little of the person interested in you - perhaps his appearance, habits and tastes will tell you a little about himself, and it will be easier for you to start a conversation. The story about himself, especially in the presence of a closed person, has little chance of continuation. Usually this is much more relevant for those cases when you already have something interested in the interlocutor and he wants to get to know you better. However, if you are a proud owner of unique and striking facts in your biography, then maybe your case will be an exception. Otherwise, do not talk much and persistently about yourself, if no one asks you.

Psychology of communication

Find interesting people and get to know themquite on forces. It does not require any special effort, and after a while it will generally become something like an automatic skill, and your circle of communication will expand substantially. You can accelerate this process by implementing the psychological recommendations described below:

Be ready for new meetings. According to the laws of positive thinking, the universe always gives us what we are set up for. Therefore, smile more often, stay open and sympathetic, and also friendly. And that is, people who walk with such a person who does not mean that dating does not mean - on the contrary, there is a fear for one's life and a desire to get away from such a person far away.

Do not hesitate to advertise that you are in this citythe beginner. Many people, having moved to a new city, for some reason begin to feel embarrassed about this situation, although in reality there is nothing bad or shameful in it. This is very uncomfortable for them, especially in the most stupid cases, when you need to ask your stop or the scheme of passage to the metro. Therefore, it is worth asking for help from someone who causes confidence, and tell him that you are alone in the new city and will be glad to get acquainted. You can "open up" to colleagues or partners in the fitness club - people like to help others, and perhaps they will be happy to tell you where it is better to spend the weekend and how you can pay bills.

Be active. Of course, do not fill up new friends with calls and e-mails - it usually scares. However, it is quite appropriate to ask them to arrange a tour around the city, invite you to join the company in a cafe or even offer them their help in a matter in which you consider yourself competent.

Try to articulate for yourself, peoplewhat type you are interested in and what you want from them. A co-worker for shopping, a partner for clubbing, a friend who shares your hobby, a vest person - this greatly depends on the tactics and way of finding new friends. Then you will not waste your time or anybody else's time, and it will be easier for you to weed out "wrong" people.

Remember that there is no single scheme forto make friends in the new city. Despite the long existence of the science of psychology, the field of human relations still does not lend itself to complete imprisonment in a strict framework. That's why you should relax and just enjoy the process of communication. We advise you to read:

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