In the life of a girl it often happens that she alreadya long time meets a young man who is alert, caring, attentive and affectionate. The young lady, of course, is convinced that she will create with her beloved a strong and happy family. But time goes by, and he does not even stutter about the wedding. The girl starts to rush about. She already doubts that the young man is serious, and not just spending time with her because there are no others yet. But after all the guy at all would not be desirable to lose! And she no longer knows how to behave. How should it be? How to marry a beloved young man when he does not invite and offers to live together? First, we determine the reasons for this behavior of a person.
Why does the guy do not call for marriage in long-term relationships?
Yes, more recently the privilege of doingThe proposal belonged to a strong sex, whose representatives considered it a norm to find their beloved and seek her consent to a marriage. Today the situation is somewhat different. Now the guy can be close to us for several months or even years, diligently look after, get acquainted with all relatives and friends, but do not even hint at marriage. And we so dream of marrying a loved one! However, his behavior pushes the thought - but do not they lead us by the nose? Perhaps a young man is looking for a more suitable party for himself? Or is he not yet making an offer for some other reason? In general, a guy may not make a proposal to a girl for a long time from various considerations. Of course, it is possible that he really wants to find himself a more suitable companion of life. But, if you think about it, it's unlikely. It is unlikely that a young man will strain himself and waste time on one that he does not consider worthy to become his wife. In addition, he makes so much effort to please her! Usually, men do not behave in this way towards a young lady, if she is not dear to them. Drawing with the offer of the hand and heart, a young man can wait for improvement of his financial situation. This is a fairly common reason that guys are not in a hurry to marry their beloved. And one of their biggest misconceptions. Because you can earn money, already having a family. And to do it even more successfully than using full freedom. Family stimulates to move forward. And freedom is somewhat discouraging. Another reason that you can not marry a loved one does not work (because the guy does not talk about the registry office) - his parents. Even if they are not bad about the girl, the father and mother can insist that the son first learns, firmly rises to his feet, and only then he already created a family. Or secretly dreaming that he will find a more suitable party for himself. Or, in general, be against the serious relationship of the beloved child with the opposite sex. Anyway, but if a young man goes around talking about the wedding party because of the instructions of his parents, the young lady should think about it. In all likelihood, the cavalier is infantile and it is unlikely that later it can become a reliable support of the family. All that we just talked about quite often occurs and is really a commonplace explanation that a guy does not offer a girl to marry him for a long time. However, the main reason for the emergence of such a situation is still entirely different. Today, male representatives have become less determined than many years ago in communicating with the weak half of the human race. I must say that this question is quite urgent and very painful. Therefore, we now talk about it in more detail.
The reasons for the indecisiveness of the guys in the relationship: what to do with them?
Actually, the fact that young people often do notdare to make an offer even to a beloved girl, the very floor is to blame. We once became fired by the desire to occupy men's positions, thus giving men the opportunity to relax and remain before us in an awkward state. No, but what about them, tell at the mercy, to do when women independently and willingly took responsibility for solving very serious issues? We did not just take it, we fiercely insist on such a right, thus winning our independence. Everywhere the idea of the fact that the most successful in all respects are women with a tough character is being promoted. The image of a bitch is propagated by a variety of sources. And the girls, whether voluntarily, unwittingly, copy the main features of it. Such traits are assertiveness, rigidity, imperiousness, conviction in rightness, independence. These are the qualities of character characteristic of the male, and not of the female type of personality. And what happens? And it turns out that we are practically consciously cultivate a man's essence, while suppressing the female essence. So it turns out that the guy next to such a girl feels not at ease. Still would! After him, near him, is a delicious creation of a weaker sex with a strong man's floor. Is from what to become puzzled! It seems that a real man should be a reliable protection for a woman and a support capable of taking responsibility for the decisions made. But the decision in this case is taken predominantly by a representative of the weaker sex! Itself accepts and they themselves should. Hence, in the protection and assistance of a man, she does not particularly need. A man, if he is a true man, it is necessary to realize that in relations with a beautiful gender, the leader and patron is exactly him. If a girl constantly suppresses the will of her partner in life, she as if persistently hints that the development of relations in a couple depends only on her. And at the same time he expects from him a decisive act in the form of a proposal of the hand and heart. Well, is not it a paradox? First, take away from the man the right to decide the fate of the relationship, and then wait from him for actions that are peculiar only to the manager of this fate. Yes, there will be no such actions, because the girl used to let her boyfriend understand - she decides how to live on. No, in general, when a woman is independent - it's not bad. Complete lack of autonomy sometimes, of course, causes men to be touched and willing to take the girl under their care. However, more often than not, over time, it starts to irritate and weigh down. Because good, quality relationships are not built only on the aspiration of one partner to nurse another. They need common interests, spiritual unity, an inner sense of support from their half. A weak-willed person is not able to ensure the presence of such factors in communication. He needs constant guardianship, which sooner or later starts to get bored in marriage. Therefore, girls, of course, should try to be personalities, ready to make serious decisions. That's only in the relationship with your beloved in this matter, the stick should not be too far. Otherwise, we will wait very long for him to offer a family. And, as a result, we can not wait at all. The guy will simply conclude that we do not need him, and will go looking for the one next to which he will feel like a man, a patron. And not the subject of the throne of the queen. Perhaps he will not be happy with her and never forget us. But to whom from this it is easier? So how to be, if the girl really has such qualities, as imperious, assertive, militant? How to marry a beloved man who is alarmed by such qualities? To break yourself or to take the bull by the horns and drag it to the registrar? Neither, in this case, it is undesirable to undertake. Complete re-personalization can become fatal, destructive for her. In the end, the guy will get married not the one he was in love with. The consequence of such a metamorphosis will be disappointment and the feeling that he was taken around his finger. And the bull by the horns in the registrar can be dragged, of course, you can. However, in the future he will either quietly stand in the stall and wait for the feeding, or he will start to beat the hoof for any reason and do what he pleases. Is this what we expect from a family relationship? The only way out of the situation for a girl is to show her female beginning in communication with her chosen one. That is, to be gentle, soft, friendly, understanding with him. Let the beloved feel that we trust him and hope for him in solving all the issues. Let the womanhood speak in full voice, demanding protection and patronage. And then the young man will feel his male power and certainly make an offer. We advise you to read: