Well, here, in our environment there was a man, onea look at which made the heart start. I want to think about this guy, I want to dream about seeing him, I want to hear his voice ... But we are well aware that the young man is not the hero of our novel at all! It will not work with him in a serious and promising relationship. Why? Yes, you never know ... He, for example, is too much a fan of women, an irresponsible egoist, a frivolous flyer, or just someone's chevalier or even a husband. Naturally, to get involved in such an unreliable tychikom or even someone else's lover can not be! If you allow yourself to thinklessly dive into the pool of feelings, you can drown. Is it worth doing this if you understand that there is only suffering in front? Of course not! But how to manage emotions? How to curb them and not fall in love with such an attractive man? After all, it's better to try to prevent the disease than later, when it goes to the acute stage, to suffer and to seek ways to heal. And for this it is necessary at least a little to understand why it arises and is subject to management and control.
Where does love come from?
Why do people fall in love? It's completely irrational. You forget about everything in the world, you're dumb, you can not concentrate on something useful and you start to get up at times, something that a person in his sanity will never think! Here's who such a sudden insanity is needed? Yes, no one. Being able to control our own emotions, we would allow ourselves to fall in love wisely and only to the one who fits all the parameters. And everything would be nobly-noble, and any young lady would fall in love only on her own. But you can not curb them, these wayward emotions! Ran out ahead, biting the bit, go, do it. How to be, if you perfectly understand that you fell in love with a man who was not created for you? And anyway, why did you choose him, and not a more suitable guy? I must say, there is no clear and unequivocal answer to such a question. Scientists say that this is due to an overabundance in the body of a chemical substance called phenylethylamine. Say, when it's a lot, we can fall in love almost with the first male. The scientist, of course, is more visible. Only somehow I can not believe that the feeling of love is explained by banal chemical reactions. Still, the real reason for its occurrence lies somewhere in the depths of the subconscious. It - like a bomb, the detonator of which works when we get the appropriate sign. It can be a smile of the guy, his gestures, voice, even the smell of cologne ... The girl felt, saw, heard and - trrrah! The bomb exploded, the dose of phenylethylamine ejected into the blood went off, and the young lady fell in love. Then, when the brain comes to itself after such a powerful explosion, it can more or less soberly assess the situation. And realize how suited to her object of love. If appropriate, there are no questions. You can give yourself to the feeling, and come what may. Well, and when the young lady realized that she had managed to fall in love with a man who does not fit in for this, then he will have to ponder why it happened and what to do now. The answer begs one. It is necessary to extinguish only the flaming feelings, until it's too late. Otherwise, it will be difficult to cope with them. Of course, managing emotions is not easy. But if it's good to try ...
How to stop the development of love
In general, a man falls in love with anyone, then,when his mind is ready for this. And she does not care whether the object of interest corresponds to some specific requirements of the mind, is not it. The main thing is to get hooked on something and get busy with the realization of emotional potential. You can cling to an element of clothing, a mysterious phrase, an attractive appearance, an interesting conversation, a nontrivial act ... Yes, even for the hair of a guy! The psychic finds an anchor of this kind and begins to create an image around it. As a result, we begin to look at some time ordinary man with very different eyes, attributing to him non-existent virtues and embellishing the existing ones. What does it say? This indicates that it is enough to eliminate the anchor, and the fog of falling in love will gradually begin to subside. Why should we begin such liquidation?
However, this is not our case. We understand very well that we fell in love unsuccessfully and that we should get rid of feelings. So, it is required to destroy the imaginary image and try to look at the young man differently. That is, in terms of its unattractiveness. I must say that it is not so simple - an emotional splash creates a wall through which unsightly deeds and traits are not visible. But we want to get rid of love! So, open our eyes wider, turn on the brains and debunk the man with the help of proven techniques.
Techniques that do not fall in love with the image of a guy
As we have already understood, not to fall in love with a guy byears, it is necessary first of all to overthrow it from the pedestal of the ideal, to which we ourselves have erected it. That is, to understand that he is by no means the crown of creation and not the embodiment of a dream. How to act to achieve this goal? There's nothing tricky about this. We just need to change our view of what we considered to be the exclusive worth of a man, and pay more attention to flaws in his appearance and behavior. That is, you need to change your attitude towards the person. Act for this will have approximately the following:
That's about the way we need to changeimpression of a person. To speed up this process, it is necessary to look for shortcomings of a very different kind in it. The guy has unshaven armpits? What a horror, after all, from him, surely, one day will start to smell strongly afterwards! Is the young man wearing a stale shirt? It seems that in the same state and socks ... He, on the contrary, pays too much attention to hygiene and clothes? Oooh, it generally makes one suspect a man of excessive tediousness and narcissism. And then in some interesting, yet not pronounced, inclinations. In the treasury of the shortcomings of the hobby object, we add up everything-ignoring or ignorance of the rules of etiquette, lack of taste, ignorance of elementary questions, and even inability to control an airplane. Oh, he can? Then, then, badly dances. Or it does not matter draws. Or writes with errors. Yes, you never know! There would be a desire. Something repellent can be found in any person always. Does not work? In this case, we will resort to the help of girlfriends or mother. We describe them to the guy without bias, intentionally speaking about him in a negative way. It is not necessary to think that this is somewhat immoral, - we need to pound ourselves into thinking that a man is more bad than good. And if you can not cope with this yourself, you'll have to make sure that it is properly scolded by others. Sometimes the opinion of close people is acting sobering. To destroy love in itself is not bad help comparing a young man with his previous hobby. But only when the comparison is in favor of the former cavalier and when this gentleman is remembered without disgust. Otherwise, we risk becoming even more attached to the one we want to forget. It is understandable - antipathy to the former friend will automatically provoke a growing sympathy for a friend of the present. We absolutely do not need this. In general, in order not to lose one's head due to one person, one should not refuse to flirt with others and favorably accept male marks of attention. In this case, firstly, we will disperse our attention, and secondly, we will have options for choice. Even if it seems that the current elected one is not better in the world. It's just focusing emotions on a particular object. You can change the focus at any time. There is no suitable man for this - we will concentrate on some actor, singer, and even a football player or political observer! The main thing is that it evokes sympathy. We will acquire a photo of a celebrity, attach it to a prominent place and tell ourselves - this man is really super! Our young man is very far away! Honestly, in the struggle of the senses and the mind, the feelings most often win. No, while the loved one is not around, the mind is still sporting. But as soon as it appears on the horizon, it's an amba! All rationalism disappears without a trace, a cycle begins in the head, a vacuum forms in the pit of the stomach, the soul croaks to the heels ... So is it worth it to make so much effort to get rid of the feeling? Dear ladies, fall in love with your health! After all, it's not so important - a man is suitable, does not fit. It is important to remain alive, capable of grief, delight, unreasonable actions by a woman. Only in this way can you feel the whole charm of being and reserve the right to happiness. We advise you to read: