There is an old saying "I've loved my whole life, and inThursday ceased to love. " In fact, it happens, and quite often. Perhaps, outwardly you are an absolute happy family, where the husband is both loving and caring, to envy all girl-friends. But one fine day he just collects his things and leaves for another woman. A wailing wife, confused children, malevolent neighbors with their eternal "I told you!" ... And another option is possible when the husband is with you, but you know for sure that he has someone on his side and an uncontrolled fountain explodes in your head emotions and feelings: resentment, anger, resentment, self-pity. And the thought alone knocks in my head like a hammer, beating a wild rhythm along the nerves: what to do, how to return the husband?
If the husband has left for another
The earth is round, the square has four corners, after the summerautumn comes, and then winter. ... All these are axioms that you do not need to prove, just like the fact that your husband loves you and will always be there. So you thought before. But now, without meeting with you a glance, he collects suitcases to breathe freely outside the door and on all wings to fly to another, to your razluchnitse. Usually this happens suddenly. It does not matter whether you suspected him of treason before or not, but it is impossible to prepare morally for a real husband's departure from the family. It seems that the whole world has collapsed and there is no point in living further. But, of course, this is not so. If you survived the departure of an expensive, beloved man from the family, then the first thing you need to do is find the strength to live on. Look around - for sure you are surrounded by loving people who are ready to support you in a difficult time. It is especially important not to forget about children at such moments, because they suffer most from the fact that the pope is no longer around. Overcome your own weakness and become a real support and support for your children, but in no case do not tune them against your husband. Children really need a father, lose both his presence, and love and respect for him - this is too hard a test for the child's psyche. Allow them to see Dad, do not interfere with their communication, because in addition to caring for children, this is also one point of our plan to return her husband home. Since you are reading this article, it means that you are not ready for a quick and decisive divorce, but in your head there is an insistent thought: I want to return my husband! Right? In that case, let's start with something that should not be done when trying to reason with your man. The main mistakes of a woman after her husband's departure
- Let's start with the most difficult: Do not shout at him, do not make hysterics and do not blame him for breaking your life. Aggression is not the best companion in building relationships. All that you achieve by this behavior is to assure your husband that he made the right choice in favor of someone who does not yell and does not shake his nerves (and your rival certainly tries to be extremely gentle and gentle with him). Of course, coping with your feelings is not so easy, but if you want to achieve the desired - to return the husband - then gain strength and courage to behave in this situation is worthy.
- Do not beg him to go back, smearing onface evil tears, do not humiliate before him. Surely he will be very sorry for you, but pity is not love, right? In the end, it's not their fault, but he, so do not lose your dignity. Make it clear that you are not one of those who are easily broken, that you are a strong and wise woman. This, at least, will cause the husband to respect.
- Do not blackmail him with children, apartment or othercommon values. Men can not stand when they are forced to do something forcibly. Even if you can force him to return for some of the reasons listed above, then you will not have a normal life, believe me.
- Do not question him about your opponent, notinquire about what it is better than you. Now he lives in another dimension, he has a state of being in love, and he will protect his passion with foam at the mouth and remember all your flaws. Do not torment yourself, this you will not achieve anything.
- Do not try to take revenge on your husband by going to the left. Firstly, it is unlikely that you will feel better from this, because sex without mutual affection does not bring moral satisfaction. Secondly, if the husband finds out about this, it is unlikely that he will want to return to you. Unfortunately, this is the psychology of men: they are much more easily affected by their own infidelities than by women. Perhaps he will get angry and povornuet, but at the thought that you belonged to another man, he is unlikely to have a desire to share with you life and bed.
As a rule, after the husband leaves, the woman isonly emotions, because it is really a great stress to lose a loved one. But you just need to pull yourself together and not commit all those mistakes that are described above. Nobody forbids you to cry out in plenty, but make sure that the husband does not see these tears. Of course, your man is dear to you, but he is not the only creature in the world for whose sake it is worth living. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, unfortunate, and cursing your evil destiny by days and nights, try to become what you were before meeting him. After all, it was in that woman that he was once without a memory in love. A guide to action for an abandoned woman
- In order to return her husband, you need to re-createlove yourself. Take care of yourself, devote more time to caring for appearance. Go to visit friends, visit fitness centers, buy yourself something fashionable out of clothes. And do not forget that all this you do not for his sake, but for yourself. Your husband did not die, but simply left your family's life, at least for now. So you have a lot of free time to regain the glamor and brilliance that surrounded you before you were mired in family life.
- Try to understand yourself and understand what is notarranged a husband in your relationship. Discard the first thought that you were an ideal wife, and your husband is just a dishonorable person. Having looked honestly at the events that took place in your common family life, you will surely understand that they themselves were in some way wrong. These conclusions wind up on your own, promising that in the future this will not happen again.
- Be confident in yourself. At meetings with the husband, behave so that he understands that he has offended you, but in any case do not take the form of a victim. Smile, talk calmly, but slightly alienated. Now he certainly expects from you inadequate reactions - accusations, cries and tears. So surprise him and show that you have pride and you do not die because of his absence. Otherwise, you simply flatter his vanity, and it is already inflated utterly (he has two women, and both go crazy with him!).
- During the time of married life together,you have a common circle of friends and acquaintances. After the husband leaves the family, this circle usually breaks into two camps: one on your side, the other on the side of the husband. Try not to recruit mutual friends to your side, do not ask them for details of his new personal life - all this will immediately become known to your husband and will only turn him away from you. Communicate with all as if nothing had happened, avoid the slippery topic of your parting - for sure you have something to talk about, except about your husband!
In your case, the best tactic is waiting. The fact that he started a conscience with another woman does not at all mean that he will be sweeter there than with you. After all, the first romantic feelings will soon subside, and come a harsh reality: dirty socks, tasteless dinner, unpleasant habits of each other. You have lived with him a lot of time and probably learned to make his life comfortable. You know exactly what he likes for breakfast, how many suits to put in his business trip, what medicine to give for a cold. Your opponent does not have such advantages. Believe me, there is a high probability that very soon he will catch sight and understand who he lost. On some flowers and kisses you will not go far; he was used to the adjusted life, and to build a new family means to get used to the new rules. Not every man can survive such stress, when before a gentle and affectionate lover suddenly begins to require him to clean up things scattered around the apartment and not drink on weekends beer with friends. So in most cases, husbands who abandoned their wives for the sake of their mistresses return home. How to return her husband? Do not lose hope and continue to live with dignity, because it is from such women to refuse the hardest. If you have a special case, you feel that you can not cope with the situation already, and you really need support in , -you are sure to find answers to many questions on the site dedicated to the topic of the return of family relations. Here is collected as a huge experience of those women who themselves have experienced the same and could , and the recommendations of specialists who have been helping people for many years in difficult situations, if there has been a break in relations. To immediately get real help and find a way, , refer to those who are aware of this problem best.
If a husband has a novel on the side
It happens in life and so that your husband did not abandon you,and every evening comes home, but you know for sure that he has another woman. He deceives you, inventing a hundred pretexts to stay on the side, and you feel that you are losing your man. What to do in such a situation, how to return his love? It would be great if you read this article before you made a major mistake: told your husband that you know about his mistress. Otherwise, you will either have to swallow the insult, continue to live with it further, or proudly shake your head, demand a divorce. But you want to return your husband to your family, right? First of all, you must understand that you are by no means a failure, from which the husband "walks". You are not at all terrible, not stupid or fat. Even husbands of the most beautiful women are set up mistresses of husbands, so stop doing humiliation. Learning that her husband has a novel on the side, it is better, under an imaginary pretext, to go somewhere far away to give vent to emotions and cry a lot. Crying your grief, you can go home and act quite adequately. Do not try to follow him at all, read his sms, ask your friends about who your rival is, it will not lead to good. In any case, he learns about your behavior, and this will cause him either pity or disgust, but not the desire to leave his passion for you. After all, he now has such a joyful, pleasant period in his life - a candy-bouquet period with your rival. And if it comes to the showdown and he will have to confess everything to you, will you be able to restrain himself from emotion and not fall into hysterics? This will become another pebble in your garden: you are a nervous hysterical woman, and she is a gentle, wise woman. And then, if after all these events you stay with him, he will understand that you can not live without him, and will change, practically without hiding! All you need to do now is fundamentally change your usual behavior and make him pay attention to you. If in your habit of pestering him with interrogations, where he disappears in the evenings, then try to ignore his eternal delays. If you are from morning to night doing things that have been building up life and cleaning, washing, rubbing an apartment, then you should take a small time-out and devote more time to yourself. Do not focus on thinking about how to get your husband back to your old life, just live for yourself. Urgent deal with your appearance: cut and paint, buy yourself something new from clothes. And do not forget about sexy underwear, and not the kind your husband used to. If you are used to choosing black satin kits, then get something red, or pink with cute crochet and push-up. Let him see you casually in the bathroom in the new underwear before your going out. This, at least, will make him think that you are interesting to someone other than him. Jealousy is a serious enough reason to leave for a time and so successfully developing relations on the side and seriously take up the "elusive" from the hands of his wife. After all, no matter how much he has cooled to you, but no one has canceled his feelings of ownership! Just do not really start a lover just to take revenge on the offender and instruct him on the horns! Maybe some of the men will shake this, forcing them to return to the bosom of the family, but most of the male representatives will never forgive the betrayal. This can be an excellent occasion to part with you officially, and to prove who started first will be already useless. Think about your mistakes, what you are doing while living with it. Perhaps, you are one of those who like to dominate the family and make her husband dance to her tune. Or maybe, on the contrary, it seems so helpless and unskillful that you do not cause anything but irritation. You know your husband very well and can perfectly understand what was wrong with you. Instead of stubbornly bending your line, try to change internally - it can not go unnoticed. But will not he go to his mistress for all the time that you will restore order in your head? Hardly, because men take such decisions for a long time. Unless you push him, driving him out of the house. At this time, it's your ally. Let him remember that you are the same woman he loved many years ago, that you are interested in other men. This should be a powerful incentive to look at you in a new way - especially if you change internally for the better. After a while, you will not be in a fever, but decide on a fresh mind: do you need this person, or can you safely let him go to a new attachment? Maybe you deserve a better life partner? So, it does not matter if your husband left for another woman, or just turns the novel on the side. The main rules for returning her husband are calmness and endurance. No aggression, no tears, no feelings of self-pity - all this kills the desire to be with you. Play a game called "I will not be lost without you" and win to spend the rest of your life with someone you love. We advise you to read: