Oh, these treason! How many divorces are due to them, how many tears are shed, how many tragedies happen! However, changes do not become less. And, alas, most often there is a betrayal of her husband, no matter how sad it did not sound. But statistics - a stubborn thing. And she claims that husbands cheat on their wives 64% more often than their husbands' wives. Most often, men brush off and joke, covering themselves with polygamy. And how things really are? To the left go not only hardened debauchee and ladies' man, but also quite a respectable people. Why? After all, not always in these cases, the connection with one partner is unsuccessful. On the contrary, often a person changes, not intending to break the previous union. And when it still comes to this, begins to tear the hair on his head, regretting what he has done. What are the causes of treason of this kind? And what are the reasons for going to the party?
Causes of betrayal of men
In order to prevent treason, it is necessary to understand why this is happening at all. Psychologists say that the husband can change for a whole lot of reasons. The main ones are:
- New love
This reason occurs most often whenUnion is based not on feelings, but on reason. Calculation by calculation, but in love, warmth and affection are needed by everyone, including men. In addition to marriage by calculation, this can happen in the event that the former love disappeared without a trace. Unfortunately, this happens all the time. As the folk joke says, love passed, tomatoes wilted.
In this case, change, wanting to take revenge on a partnerfor his infidelity. As a rule, from such a betrayal a man does not get any pleasure at all - only greater spiritual discomfort. For a man, the betrayal of a beloved woman is a very strong psychological blow, recovering from which only a few men can do and very rarely.
- Search for new sensations
Such betrayal usually happens in marriages already havingrather long experience. How unpleasant a woman was to admit, her husband's betrayal in this case and her fault. After all, any relationship must be constantly fed, take care of them, like a rare flower, so that they do not fade. If your husband is comfortable and interesting with you, he will never look for thrill on the side. Or in alliances where free relations are practiced - although, strictly speaking, it is foolish in this case to talk about treason.
- Random communication
Such changes are unintentional and almost notlead to further relations between people. Just happened favorable circumstances for sex and all. Unfortunately, such infidelities are found most often and it is because of them that a huge number of families are collapsing. But for the sake of justice, it should be noted that most often random changes occur in cases where the family is not all right. Otherwise, a happy man will not even notice that a favorable situation has developed for treason - a pretty fellow traveler, a corporate party, and so on.
- Fear of extinction of sexuality
In this case, betrayal is due to the fact thata man seeks to prove to himself that sexually he is still quite wealthy. Most often this happens after 45 years. And a man can sincerely love his wife and consider it better, but he will not miss the opportunity to see once again his masculine abilities, charm and irresistibility.
- The crisis of marriage
Here the changes are analogous to attempts to create a new onefamily. A man is not looking for sex, but quite different. Someone tries to prove that in all problems the wife is guilty: for this he compares it with other women to make sure of her insolvency. And someone and at all because of desperation starts to search for a new family, and at all the mistress. As a rule, this is an extreme measure, to which the man resorts last.
- Lack of love of one of the spouses
And do you know that sometimes it can change andmadly loving man? If a person unrequitedly loves his mate and is unable to part with it, he can try to compensate for the lack of reciprocity by communication on the side. To at least briefly feel loved. And then he returns to the object of his unrequited love.
- The desire to revive the relationship
Such a betrayal is usually sought to be made explicit inhope that this will make the partner's feelings flare up again with a bright flame. We women understand that this is complete nonsense. However, desperate men do not understand this and are resolved here at such an extreme step. And pay attention - despite all the obvious signs of betrayal, in fact, it might not be. So, a theatrical performance for one viewer - his wife.
- The desire to raise your social status or financial status
Such mercantile reasons for change occurquite often and, in principle, as old as the world. And do not be surprised - recently, alas, this is typical of a male audience. And a wife can not always become a hindrance to a romance beneficial for a man.
- The desire to break off relations with a bothered partner
In this case, the person changes openly, hoping,that betrayal will put an end to an already outlived relationship. The wife is in an openly humiliating position. Unfortunately, in this case, the relationship should not even try to save. A man doing this way does not just dislike his wife, but does not even respect him.
Through treason, people try to understand that theyfeel at the proximity of an outsider and whether it will be the same as with a spouse, or better. Most often this happens in the event that a man married too early and he had only one sexual partner. In the people it is called "did not walk up".
- Desire to be distracted from life's problems
Here, infidelity to one's partner is explained by the desire to create a kind of love oasis in which one can rest from the vicissitudes of the outside world. Naive men ... Such big, and believe in fairy tales.
- The desire to raise self-esteem
Relations on the side for people with lowself-esteem is a great opportunity to feel completely self-sufficient. Do not confuse yourself with trying to prove your male viability. A very young man can also raise his self-esteem if he does not see respect in the family.
- Unrealized sexual needs
In this case, the search for a partner on the side is calledthe desire to realize sexual fantasies, which in marriage to realize it is not possible. In general, these are the most frequent reasons that men allow themselves to hike to the left. Strangely enough, quite a few fans of such campaigns are convinced that their connections on the side contribute to the strengthening of marriage. Actually, this makes sense - treason sometimes allows you to understand how much your half is better, and tie it to a new power. That's just how the half herself will react to adultery, if she finds out about him, it is not known. Women can still, drowning a pillow in tears and chasing with a rolling pin for a faithful, in the end calm down. Why? But let's see.
To forgive or to leave?
It would seem that adultery always remainstreason, and it is quite possible to put it on a par with betrayal. However, this is not quite true. The fact is that the motivation for female and male betrayals is different. Therefore, the attitude towards them must be different. Men in the majority change because of their sexual needs. Spirituality is rarely involved in such changes. They involve only the body, which, being satisfied, can never again reach out to a temporary partner on the bed. And sex happens often because of the long absence of a wife nearby, under the influence of alcohol or because of the availability of a partner. Many men who enter into extramarital affairs are moved by ordinary curiosity. Decide on betrayal of husbands can, quarreling with his wife, frightened of the loss of male viability, because of his wife's pregnancy and so on. In a word, to the infidelity of our dear faithful, as a rule, the soul is not pushing, as a rule. No, it happens that the soul, of course. But it will already, perhaps, end the marriage. As for women, with their infidelity, things are somewhat different. In this case, the main concern is dissatisfaction with the relationship with her husband. That is, representatives of the weaker sex most often enter into extramarital affairs because of lack of love and care in the family. They try to either find this love, or prove to themselves that they are still in demand and attractive. Thus, the main reason for female adultery is fundamentally different from the causes of adultery male. Men are pushing on the adultery mainly sexual attraction, women - emotional emptiness. And what does this tell us? And this suggests that the female sex is involved in betrayal, and the soul and body. Men are mostly body. That's why men's betrayal does not look as significant as a woman's. Our precious husbands can even with a successful marriage, without much thought, sleep with another woman. Think about the problem! After all, internally, he is with his wife! But a woman with a good marriage is unlikely to decide this. Because for sex with a stranger, she will have to break off the emotional connection with her husband. It's another matter if there is no such connection, and someone else can be admitted into the soul. Conclusion: women's treason is more difficult to forgive, because they are like a transfer of feelings to another partner. Running his wife left his wife almost lost. A woman traveling on someone else's bed of her husband - not always. In general, the emotional causes of family betrayal appear when one of the spouses can not satisfy in marriage their spiritual needs. This happens, for example, with a lack of communication, the search of which may well drive a person into the trap of treason. From a similar love triangle to get out very difficult, if you do not try to establish a family microclimate. Because part of the needs will be satisfied by the spouse, and some - by a new partner. And you get a vicious circle. In general, any betrayal is almost never accidental. They mature gradually when people do not meet each other's expectations, become less attentive, stern, selfish. Infidelity is, rather, a desire for positive change than a sex drive. Just for men, this desire is manifested in the search for new sexual partners. Unfortunately, very often a woman can not forgive her betrayal, because she tries on the situation on herself. They believe that betrayal occurred in the soul, not in the body. If you find it difficult to understand the situation yourself, contact a psychologist. Treason husband - a serious psychological trauma and survive it is very difficult. We advise you to read: