When one of our friends is sad, wewe feel quite clear desire to cheer it up; but sometimes it is quite difficult to do it correctly, so as not to offend inadvertently and not spoil her mood even more. Much depends on the degree of your friendly intimacy and actually on the cause of her sadness. For example, if you yourself spoiled her mood (maybe you quarreled, and only then did you realize that you were wrong), then you will have to do more to cheer your girlfriend. There may, of course, be other reasons, and there may be many. The recent divorce that your friend had to endure, the news of a serious illness or the death of a loved one ... Undoubtedly, when the best friend is upset, it can be very painful for you. Regardless of the reason, if you show patience and understanding, you can quickly find a way to cheer up a girl. We are also ready to offer several ways with which you will help your friend to go through difficult times, feeling the warmth of your shoulder. And we will consider different situations.
How to cheer up a girlfriend when she's upset about something
Suppose you feel that your beloved friend is sad, but you do not see an obvious reason. Or maybe just do not know about it. What can be done in this situation?
- Ask her what is the reason for changing hermood Just try to ask a question so that she feels your concern; insincere words or patronizing tone you will upset her even more. Listen to the answer without interrupting, even if you yourself at this time will become the object of her criticism (if it is you by some act or careless words hurt her). Do not be tempted to parry her attacks or take up defensive positions. Regardless of the reason for her sadness, it is very important to become a good listener. This way you show your girlfriend your special attitude to her, your desire to understand and help.
- Offer the girl his support. Let the girlfriend know that she can count on you, even if she is not yet ready to ask you about it.
- Give her the opportunity to stay inside her"Shell", if she does not want to talk about what happened, stop quarreling with her and simply try to distract her from sad thoughts. You can not climb into a person's soul if he does not want to let you go.
- Show that you sympathize with her conditionIt does not matter how you do it - words or actions, - the main thing is for a friend to see your empathy. The trouble is that one of the most natural reactions of people to the bad mood of loved ones is to pretend to be emotionally deaf or even try to defend themselves by occupying a defensive defense. Do not succumb to this temptation. The anger or displeasure of your girlfriend can not be directed at all against you. Better tell her: "I know you had a hard day, and you seem to be too tired. Is there anything that I could do for you? "Or:" I feel that you are angry. Tell me, what's going on? "
- If the girl wants to tell you thatshe was upset, then listen carefully to her. This is the best thing you can do for your girlfriend at first, when she is upset. Give her to pour out her soul, remove some of it from her. Do not try to give advice immediately. If you are not sure, do not hesitate to ask your friend if she wants to just speak out, or she wants to know your opinion.
- Do for a friend something that sheloves It will be good not only for an obvious reason - because it will help reduce the sadness of your beloved friend - but it will also help to show your sympathy and love for her if the girlfriend does not want to say that she is depressed. And sometimes it can help to find out what has happened.
- Give her something from yourself, share somethingmeaningful It does not have to be something tangible; it can be the time that you will allocate from your busy schedule to meet and talk with the frustrated girl, or the changed plans for the day off, when you all throw and go to your girlfriend to get her to a movie or a cafe. When you sacrifice something for her that you would not do in another situation, it will tell your friend about your willingness to help her. So she will not feel too lonely.
- Suggest a friend to do for her somean urgent important matter for which she does not have the strength or the mood now, you, of course, can not solve all her problems for her, but you can help in solving one issue from her list. You can run for a friend in the store, wash the dishes for her or pay her bills. Often what worries a person - lack of time for household chores or work difficulties - is an additional source of tension for him. If you know what exactly is oppressing your girlfriend, offer her your help. By helping her, you can greatly improve her mood. Even if she refuses your help, the fact of your care for her will be supported by her spirit.
- Spend some time to distractgirlfriend from gloomy thoughts. Suggest her to go for a walk. Sometimes a simple walk through the park can raise your spirits. Chat about something pleasant for you, for example, indulge in a memory of those funny adventures that you happened to experience together. Sit in a cafe, tasting delicious cakes. Who else but you know that we girls are able to come in a good mood, with only one kind of sweets! Perhaps, this is the easiest and most pleasant way to raise a girl's mood.
- Summon all your humor to the rescueplay a trick on yourself if this is appropriate in the course of the conversation. Such jokes not only can amuse you both, but also make you in the eyes of the interlocutor more accessible. It will be easier for her to trust you if she wants to talk. So, tell us what you do not do for your beloved friend! You can also watch a good comedy together. Watching the funny adventures of the heroes, the girl will be distracted from her own unhappy thoughts. Watch the evening of humor on TV, too, will be very handy. In general, try to make your friend smile. Our brains are used to associating certain actions with their corresponding emotions, and if you smile, the brain will give the command: "Be happy!" You can raise the mood by smiling just to yourself. Use humor, jokes, anecdotes, but just make sure that your choice is right. If you start joking too early and out of place, you risk appear insensitive. Nevertheless, if you know your friend well, then you can always make her laugh.
- Listen to music together No other kindart is not capable of influencing our subconscious like music. Just do not include sad and capable of causing sad emotions of the song: your mood will "follow" after the music. A sad song will make your girlfriend feel even worse, while cheerful will make you forget about worries at least for a while.
- Involve your girlfriend in a fuss with a pet,her or her own Animals usually feel the mood of the owners, and if the girlfriend is sad, then her favorite certainly hid in the corner. Rastormoshite pet, involve him in the game - and a friend, of course, too. Kiss and grasp the animal - the smallest sign of love from a cute little creature can turn your cloudy day into the warmest and sunny.
- Make for a friend a small gift thathas not so much practical, as the emotional value Create a mix of your favorite girl songs, for example, and write them to the disc. Bring her her favorite flowers. Buy her a CD with your favorite movie. You can come up with a lot of such nice little things that you will be able to please your beloved friend.
How to cheer the girl on the phone
Sometimes speaking on the phone is all that matters.It is required to raise the girl's mood. Of course, if her mood is very bad, she might not want to pick it up. Then we recall the above recommendations and fly to her home. And if she came up to the phone, but did not show much desire to talk, after a few minutes of your "speeches" (always in optimistic tones!) She will cheer up and even thank you for perseverance.
- Talk to a friend with a smile in your voiceSmile when you talk to her, because it will affect your intonation, and this will help improve her mood. A smile will radiate your kindness, which will show that you want to take care of it. It's always nice to know that someone is worried about you!
- You can ask her about the reason for the bad mood;but do not feel rejected if she does not want to talk about it. Girls usually want to express their feelings and feelings, especially if something that wounded her soul happened recently. But if your friend hides, then you should not invade her personal space, trying to call her to frankness.
- If the girlfriend, on the contrary, is too immersed inexperiencing trouble, gently translate the conversation into some merry topic. Distract her attention from the experiences and laugh her. Think of some funny story that supposedly happened to you, or tell us about the fun trick of your child or pet. This will help you to cheer her up.
- Again, ask her to get out of the house andgo somewhere together It would be best to spend time somehow fun - with eating ice cream at a nearby cafe or dancing with friends at someone's party.
How to cheer up a girl with low self-esteem
No matter what your reasonfriend or girlfriend feels insecure in life, often staying because of this in a bad mood, in your power to teach her to be happy. Show her that every girl deserves to be appreciated. Give her the impetus to increase self-esteem, supporting her motivation, and she will cease to be sad and frown. Here's what you can do for her:
- Start the day with an unexpected surpriseSay hello to her with a joyful and friendly message on mobile communications. Send a smile or some nice picture by e-mail. Bring her multicolored balloons. There can be many ideas!
- Talk to her alone, usingoptimistic, energetic tone If this is your co-worker or classmate, then praise her for a job well done or for an attractive appearance. Ask how things are going and let them express their concerns. Help her feel more confident, it will definitely improve her mood.
- If this is your close friend, help herDetermine your best and most strengths Make a large collage together, pasting pictures that represent its best qualities. Add your own contribution to this collage by specifying those traits of character that your girlfriend does not notice. Illustrate all her good deeds, all that she does for other people. Hang this collage in her room - he is guaranteed to cheer her up. And at the same time and self-esteem!
In the life of every girl there are their ups and downs.falling. Whether it happens because of serious life changes, or because of personal tragedy, or are just minor reasons for the disorder - there are times when it needs support, communication and friendly warmth. All that is required of you at this moment is just to let her know that you will do everything necessary to raise her spirits. And then you, too, someone will come to the rescue, if your mood falls "below the plinth"! We advise you to read: